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Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More than IQ Hardcover – September 1, 1995
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The Western cultures esteem analytical skills measured by IQ tests: but there is clearly more to success and happiness, even in technological societies, than IQ alone. Goleman has written one of the best books on the nature and importance of other kinds of intelligence besides our perhaps overly beloved IQ. Recommended.
From Publishers Weekly
New York Times science writer Goleman argues that our emotions play a much greater role in thought, decision making and individual success than is commonly acknowledged. He defines "emotional intelligence"?a trait not measured by IQ tests?as a set of skills, including control of one's impulses, self-motivation, empathy and social competence in interpersonal relationships. Although his highly accessible survey of research into cognitive and emotional development may not convince readers that this grab bag of faculties comprise a clearly recognizable, well-defined aptitude, his report is nevertheless an intriguing and practical guide to emotional mastery. In marriage, emotional intelligence means listening well and being able to calm down. In the workplace, it manifests when bosses give subordinates constructive feedback regarding their performance. Goleman also looks at pilot programs in schools from New York City to Oakland, Calif., where kids are taught conflict resolution, impulse control and social skills.
Copyright 1995 Reed Business Information, Inc.
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The reason I am giving this a 3-star review is because after listening to the CD, I didn't come away with much practical advice. It's more like food for thought. Also, many of the anecdotes are from childhood (example: person x had something traumatic happen in his/her childhood, now that person exhibits signs of y as an adult). Ok, this is well and good, but it doesn't bring the lesson full circle to say, here's how to unlearn this pattern as an adult.
The one other thing that annoyed me was his voice at times. I want to be sensitive saying this, because I think he is most likely a very caring man who has devoted his life to doing good, but there was a condescending tone to many of the stories. It was almost like, as a listener who was trying to learn from the stories, I was already picking up his disdain for some of the behaviors.
I wouldn't say don't get this, but I'd say to buy with the intention of opening your mind to the concept rather than find practical ways to develop a well honed sense of emotional intelligence.
1. The ability to handle impulses
2. The ability to handle difficulties and setbacks
3. The ability to handle pressure and anxiety.
Overall Emotional Intelligence is our meta-level ability to handle emotions and use them to our advantage. I discuss in more detail in the video above.
A word of caution for prospective readers - this reads more like a textbook than a story. It is worth the effort but don't go in assuming the pages will fly by.