- File Size: 12170 KB
- Print Length: 595 pages
- Simultaneous Device Usage: Unlimited
- Publication Date: December 5, 2016
- Sold by: Amazon Digital Services LLC
- Language: English
- ASIN: B01N2R15ST
- Text-to-Speech: Enabled
- Word Wise: Enabled
- Lending: Enabled
- Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #69,926 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
The Federal Witch: The Collected Works, Book 1 Kindle Edition
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|Length: 595 pages||Word Wise: Enabled||Enhanced Typesetting: Enabled|
|Page Flip: Enabled||
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Top customer reviews
I credit the author with his worldbuilding skills. His set-up is intriguing, starting with a previously hidden paranormal society that had to out itself with the advent of the first world war. And I dig Aggy's quirky roommate Catherine Moore - who is a werecat Alpha - and Agatha's irrepressible familiar, Fergus, who happens to be that same unicorn she shrunk oh those years ago. Paul tries to right away establish Aggy as an underdog to root for. Her elders consider her an unpredictable menace. The narrative takes an anti-Ell Donsaii approach in that those who meet Aggy in the outside world greet her with immediate hostility. Some instantly draw their guns on her. In the area of public regard, it seems that witches are not to be trusted.
The Federal Witch: Book 1 is an omnibus that contains the short story prequel, "Born a Witch... Drafted by the FBI (The Federal Witch Book 0)," and the first two books, Conjuring Quantico and Magical Probi. I wish I could give this a good rating because I eat up this sort of wacky premise. But T.S. Paul sinks his own storytelling. You'd think, by producing this omnibus, he would've taken the opportunity to correct all the grammatical and punctuational blunders. But, no.
- "Demon incursions here deadly for all involved."
- "While you took your nap, Agatha. We brought in more troops and secured the area."
- "If you aren't going to, believe me. I'll just go home then."
- "I'm, sure I would get used to having it eventually."
- "Hello, Grams. That's creepy how you do that you know."
Those above are only a few. You can't go pages without bumping into a horribly misplaced punctuation mark. This was so jarring and so rampant that it kept taking me out of the story. Not to mention, frequently enough, the author refuses to use contractions which results in dialogue that doesn't flow naturally, that feels stilted. His storytelling is scatterschot. His character work could do with more three-dimensional depth. Excepting Cat and Fergus, the other characters feel so cardboard and seem to lack a life of their own. The sense I get is that, when Aggy isn't directly interacting with them, they either vanish into limbo or freeze into some holding pattern.
And then there are the inconsistencies. In the prequel "Born a Witch... Drafted by the FBI," Aggy is very keen to help people, and wants to go into law enforcement, and jumps at the chance to attend the FBI Academy. But in Conjuring Quantico she "was forced to join the FBI." In "Born a Witch..." it was her Aunt Cordelia who blackballed her to all the witch schools, leaving it to her grandmother to home school her. In Conjuring Quantico, it was her Aunt Camilla who did the blackballing.
I don't get all up in arms at the occasional errant comma or apostrophe. But there's errant, and there's egregious. One of my favorite ongoing reading right now is Michael Anderle's Kurtherian Gambit saga (and, by the way, Anderle is another party guilty of sloppy editing). I'm so into that series, I'm even all in when it comes to the various spinoffs he'd allowed other authors to write. As such, I was looking forward to checking out Paul's Etheric Academy spinoff. Now, not so much. Maybe, someday, I'll resume Paul's Federal Witch series. For now, I'm too busy building a community shelter for all the commas and apostrophes that Paul had traumatized. I'd meant to start this post with this fluff sentence: "I heard that T.S. Paul finds inspiration in cooking his family and his cat." But, as you can see, the commas ran away.
The reason for three stars is that there are so many punctuation errors, lack of new paragraphs for new speakers or topics, and some misuse of words, so that the reader has to stop frequently to figure out the true intent of the writer. Too distracting! These mistakes would not take too much to fix, the story is a good one, but, please, find an editor!
I love the stories and definitely look forward to more.
The only downside was a little sloppy editing in some spots, but not nearly enough to prevent me from moving right on to see what happened next!
Love this series and hope to see many more installments in the future!