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Feeling And Healing Your Emotions Paperback – February 1, 2003
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The book is based on a question and answer format, but the premise of the book is simple: Dr. Baars (a clinical psychiatrist with a breadth of experience) proposed that, rather than arguing with our emotions, and trying to suppress them, it was better to feel them, and heal them. This does not mean giving into one's emotional whims. Baars argues that there is a place for the intellect and prudence, and a space between our emotions and how we react to them. However, our emotions are an important gift from God. The emotions we feel are not a moral calculus. Feeling anger is not a sin for instance; neither is sadness. If we feel anger, and then pile on guilt on top of it for feeling anger, and then try to suppress the anger, we are headed for a ton of emotional problems over time. That is NOT to say we can't sin in how we respond to our anger, but the emotions themselves are there for a very important reason, and if we ignore them or suppress them, we can do ourselves serious harm.
This is a major work in my opinion, and one that needs to be rediscovered and read widely.
What makes this book unique is that he describes how you can become more present to the good things around you. When you learn how to do this, your stress level decreases, and you have more energy. With this renewed energy and perspective you can go about making gradual changes in your life. There's nothing contrived, or forced about it.
This book is also profound in that Dr. Baars combines his knowledge of philosophy, psychology, and religion to arrive at an approach that treats the entire person.
Emotional maturity is the attainable horizon that this book points to.
The first helpful thing that this book did was to arrange some emotions into catagories:
Emotions of pleasure/appetite
Emotions that are assertive or bring energy/action, utilitarian emotions.
Emotions of pleasure build on each other:
Joy when it is obtained
Avoid/have an aversion to something
Sad if it comes about.
All sorts of synonyms for each of those could be listed.
This made sense and has helped me.
The next group, assertive emotions, cause action.
Hope causes energy to get something that would bring joy.
Despair causes actions to avoid losing something that would bring joy or to avoid something that would bring sadness.
Anger, and it's synonyms, is a separate assertive emotion.
That is a brief outline of the first thing that I found helpful.
Some of the writing is not clear cut in defining some terms, but I got enough out of it to find it very useful.
The author talks about Emotional Deprivation Disorder as something which stunts a child's ability to grow emotional due to lack of unconditional acceptance by the parents.Read more ›
Most Recent Customer Reviews
Kind of older ideas and language, but still on target. Very helpful to see myself more clearly, and validating.Published 5 months ago by Java
Very accurately describes clients who fall between adjustment disorder and psychotic symptoms. Affirms clinicians who know clinical distance must be peppered with supportive... Read morePublished 5 months ago by heads up
Conrad Baars along with Thomas Aquinas, and Anna Terrue have taught me invaluable truths on the emotions that I was never taught growing up. Read morePublished 18 months ago by Christian Cobo
I recommend this book an audio version. It is so good, and profound, that I need and enjoy listening to it and letting the words just wash over me. I highly recommend it.Published 20 months ago by Td
I enjoyed the clarity of the writing. I got terms for terms that I had heard but never had clear definitions for like the heart. Read morePublished 22 months ago by Jon Murray