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The Feminist and the Cowboy: An Unlikely Love Story Hardcover – January 3, 2013
This Modern Love
The exciting new release from Will Darbyshire. Learn more
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Top Customer Reviews
Anyone who has been in a protracted bad relationship with someone who wasn't a good match for them will recognize their own bad relationship in Alisa's. The issues she attributes to the vast divide between liberal feminist and conservative cowboy are actually no more, and no less, than the same issues all mismatched couples face, the largest one being a total inability to constructively communicate with each other. To wit: the huge fights over nothing. The "what did you mean by that" comments that turn into all-night screaming arguments. The great sex followed by fights followed by temporary agonizing breakups followed by tearful reconciliations followed by more great sex, repeat cycle. The lying, to each other and to oneself.Read more ›
She has just announced, a week after the book came out, that this turned out to be a violent, abusive relationship. At one point, she was afraid he was going to kill her, so she jumped from his moving pickup truck: "I landed facedown on a bunch of rocks, nearly crushed under the back tires, dislocating my shoulder, badly cut and bruised everywhere, my hip filling with blood. I screamed. He stopped the truck, walked over, looked at me on the ground as I begged him to call an ambulance. "Only you would be stupid enough to jump out of a moving truck," he told me. He did not help me, or come near me. Instead, he said he was going to the hunting lodge to get some witnesses, in case I tried to tell the police he had done this to me."
Anyone interested in this topic might want to read "Crazy Love" by Leslie Morgan Steiner.
Who said that guys are the only ones who think with what's in their pants? While Alisa finds him challenging and hard to live with, she's also very attracted by his hunky good features. Aside from the fact that she's no blushing virgin, this could be the plot of nearly any romance novel - rough around the edges country "real man" takes control and shows uptight city lady a good time. True love ensues.
Personally, I saw more red flags waving than at a matador convention. Whether it was the way the cowboy screamed at his dogs, told her to shut up, the way he had her groveling and apologizing to get him back after she busted him for cheating on her, or his coolly delivered bald-faced lies that reeked of narcissism, I cringed for her every time she made excuses for him. He manhandled her pet dog? That's okay, turns out there was a rattlesnake nearby, and he didn't have time to explain that just then. He rudely domineered the conversation with her parents? Well, he was just trying to protect her, since they obviously don't have her best interests at heart. He's got a nonsensical list of rules for her a mile long? That's just biological imperative. "Real" men are supposed to be that way, apparently.
The book ends on an abrupt note - she's started a website called learningtosubmit.Read more ›
Those wacky feminists -- always on about the equality this and male privilege that.
If they'd just learn to submit they'd hardly need much rapin' 'tall.
Just remember when some right-wing pundit cites this book as a relationship template, it comes with with a side of beatings and nice rape cherry on top.
You call it corn. We call it felony.
I won't be reading this "romantic memoir."
Most Recent Customer Reviews
I was intrigued by the title and a few reviews I read, so I requested this from my library. I liked it at first, but this book needed serious editing and this author needs a lot... Read morePublished 9 months ago by Sally Ember
Valdes has deep emotional issues and an alarmingly erroneous idea about how feminism works. Based on the manipulative relationship dynamic seen in the book, I'm not surprised that... Read morePublished 15 months ago by Cherry
It's entertaining but not an actual good read. She writes in an inner dialogue sort of way, which makes it funny-ish but don't bother calling the Pulitzer people any time soon. Read morePublished on June 23, 2014 by Dandy Dandelions
Received in excellent condition, one more to add to my collection of books by this author. Just love her stories, so worth the price.Published on May 29, 2014 by Donnamarie Silva
Ever had someone you love and care about engage and stay in an abusive relationship? You'll have similar sick feelings and frustrations when reading this book, because that's... Read morePublished on May 5, 2014 by Marie
often not worth the patience for reading it
story isn't interesting
had to read it only because it got suggested by the local book club
Reading Alisa Valdes’s memoir was like watching a reality television show – all chaos and drama and no substance. Read morePublished on February 13, 2014 by PJS
If you are an Alisa Valdes Rodriquez fan like I am than you will thoroughly enjoy this book. Her writing abilities never disappoint. Read morePublished on December 21, 2013 by Natalie N