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The Five Keys to Mindful Communication: Using Deep Listening and Mindful Speech to Strengthen Relationships, Heal Conflicts, and Accomplish Your Goals by [Chapman, Susan Gillis]
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The Five Keys to Mindful Communication: Using Deep Listening and Mindful Speech to Strengthen Relationships, Heal Conflicts, and Accomplish Your Goals Kindle Edition

4.1 out of 5 stars 19 customer reviews

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Length: 227 pages Word Wise: Enabled Enhanced Typesetting: Enabled
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Editorial Reviews

Review

“In a clear and at times humorous style this encouraging book gives our heart the green light to open. Susan Chapman presents accessible practices from Buddhism and the best in psychology to help this happen.”—David Richo, author of Coming Home to Who You Are

“This is an invaluable resource for anyone who longs for connection with others. Susan Chapman’s simple explanations and engaging stories provide us with practical tools that let us recognize our shared humanity, moving us from a ‘me-first’ approach to a ‘we-first’ one.”—Karen Kissel Wegela, author of The Courage to Be Present and What Really Helps

About the Author

Gabra Zackman knows romance.Her clever and thrilling romantic caper ("Library Journal") Bod Squad series was inspired by the more than one hundred romance and women s fiction titles she has narrated for audio. She divides her time between her native New York City and Denver, Colorado.

Product Details

  • File Size: 691 KB
  • Print Length: 227 pages
  • Publisher: Shambhala Publications; 1 edition (April 10, 2012)
  • Publication Date: April 10, 2012
  • Sold by: Amazon Digital Services LLC
  • Language: English
  • ASIN: B008JFN4BA
  • Text-to-Speech: Enabled
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  • Word Wise: Enabled
  • Lending: Enabled
  • Enhanced Typesetting: Enabled
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #141,531 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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Customer Reviews

Top Customer Reviews

Format: Paperback
Susan Chapman specializes in mindful communication. Whether she is approaching that specialty from the professional perspective of a family and marital therapist, or from the perspective derived from her years of Buddhist practice, her goal is the same: to increase positive communication between human beings. She believes that it is the true key to improving our struggling society. She believes her goal is achievable. She has watched for decades as the principles outlined in the book have helped people alter their relationships and their lives.

Practicing what she preaches, she presents her ideas in a nonjudgmental, compassionate, and open-ended manner. She uses the simple metaphor of a traffic light to help readers categorize their reactions and responses and recognize when changes need to be made. She adds "Journal Exercises" throughout to help us put our new awareness into action. She provides gentle guidelines for practicing meditation so that we can use that tool to relax and untangle our thoughts.

The ideas in this book will open the door for tremendous self-healing even before they are applied to communication with others. Change begins with the conversations we have with ourselves. This book begins there and then shows us how to apply what we've learned to every other aspect of our lives. It is down-to-earth, filled with positive and possible suggestions, and realistic in both its goals and its expectations. I highly recommend it.

(InannaWorks.com received a free review copy of this book.)
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By md on October 23, 2014
Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
While there is some valuable insight hidden within this book, I didn't feel like the book did a good job at conveying the most essential points. The writing was not very concise or well-organized, so that by the end of the book I still didn't feel like I fully understood the analogy of red-yellow-green light communication that the author had used over and over again throughout the book. I finished the book feeling like I got something out of it, but not really sure about what that something was or how to apply it to my relationships.
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Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
This isn't a book that can be read quickly because the wisdom that is there takes awhile to process. For example: The idea that to be defensive is the same as "toxic certainty"--and this did ring true in my own relationships. After reading this book, I walked away with a better understanding of how to improve my communication with others.
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Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
I read this book twice from the library then bought it. The author's approach using the green/yellow/red lights idea is easy to use and explain, then to apply it to when one has or does not have an open heart or open mind in situations works for me. She does begin with talking about mindfulness and personal awareness of when one is open and closed, a reminder that it all begins with oneself and how aware we are.
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This book provides good examples and is well written however it can be a bit redundant in the information it provides. It does describe some practical steps (which are wonderful) but does not provide enough practical application and ideas. Overall worth reading.
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Format: Paperback Verified Purchase
Within the first few chapters contained very powerful suggestions that really did help my fiance and I communicate better. I would reccomend this book to any couple that needs help listening to each other.
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Format: Kindle Edition
My favorite book on mindfulness and communication in a long time! It was such a turning point for me when I was introduced to the practice of mindfulness over twenty-five years ago. (Just last week, when cleaning out an old file, I found the certificate of "Living Creatively with Stress" from Loyalist College in Eastern Ontario dated May 1990... I had moved to the country after a burnout as a young, over-idealistic nurse in bustling Toronto.)
So I've read much on mindfulness, have been on numerous mindfulness meditation retreats, and despite my formal daily meditation practice waxing and waning, not a day goes by in my life that isn't enriched by remembering to remember... Yet this book has added a dimension to the practice that has made a difference in how I cultivate unconditional friendliness while setting healthy boundaries in relationships: with my family, friends, team-members, patients, and last but not least with myself.
Similar to The Moment by Achim Nowak, this book offers simple tools to refresh and deepen a tried and true practice. (I rarely write reviews, and today I'm writing two!)
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Format: Paperback
I've read the entire book, and I'm still waiting for a practical definition of mindful communication. She talks about "meditation" "unconditional friendliness" "red light communication" "winter cycle" "getting in touch with your fears" etc. All of it is discussed in terms of imagery and metaphor, and none of it is clear. The book contains no practical or reality based information that a person could apply to their lives. She wrote incessantly about the importance of communication, but gave no details on how to more effectively communicate. I'm sure she had some good ideas, but I just couldn't tell what they were. A more apt title for this book would be "How to meditate" or "How to leave and abusive partner." Quite a disappointment.
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