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The Future of Love Paperback – January 19, 1999
Best Books of the Year So Far in fiction, nonfiction, mysteries, children's books, and much more.
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From Publishers Weekly
Copyright 1998 Reed Business Information, Inc. --This text refers to the Hardcover edition.
--Marianne Williamson, author of A Return to Love
"In this innovative book, Daphne Rose Kingma breaks down the popular myth of how love is 'supposed' to be by introducing us to a broad spectrum of intimate connections. She reveals how to work through the various confrontations that every relationship encounters and reach deeper levels of love and intimacy."
--John Gray, author of Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus
From the Hardcover edition.
Top Customer Reviews
The general theme that I left this book with was that love is an infinitely powerful force, and as being such, love takes on an infinite array of scenarios. Some of the scenarios can be gay, lesbian, straight, friendship, emotional, long-distance,strictly sexual, non-sexual, and even communal. Basically, the point is that love can take a variety of forms and this is the ultimate desire of the human soul.
While I personally didn't find anything in this book to be offensive, I can understand that many people may find this book controversial or even offensive. This book suggests that divorce, extramarital affairs, polyamorism, gay marriage, and even casual sex can serve a spiritual purpose for the soul. Even if you are skeptical of this point, I suggest you read the book anyway.
I find it also important to note that this book is on Neale Donald Walsch's "Ten Books that Can Change the World" list. This book is an excellent expansion of some of the relationship suggestions featured in his "Conversations with God" series. At times I found myself wondering if this book was actually written by Walsch.
This book gives permission to us not to conform to the social norms, convinces us that it's OK to have "failed" relationships, and tells us that there are more to love than what we are used to know. SOUL LOVE is the ultimate love, according to Kingma. Search within yourself, acknowledge what you really need, believe in the agenda of the soul, and you'll see the way.
This is a good book to help us console ourselves.
On the other hand, this book also challenges what most people believe in - social norms and expectations that seem to put things in order. It belittles the importance of marriage institute and underestimates the virtue of shouldering responsibilities. The way I see it, if the soul is too busy trying to grow it may neglect the needs of the family. I am a bit skeptical with her confidence with her "love prophecies".
The book is well written, with sufficient examples to illustrate the ideas. Some sentences are too similar to those found in Conversation With God, though.
All in all, there are some good points well elaborated in this book. Take them. At the same time, be cautious to some of the dangerous, crazy ideas. Oh! I might be traditional! ;-)
First, I must warn potential readers that this is NOT a self-help book "about love." In the broadest of terms, Kingma turns our perception of how we view love on its head, and invites us to consider love in the context of the soul, rather than as an extension of wants, desires, needs, personality, insecurities, and so forth. At the heart of this lies the non-dualistic premise that love isn't something we "want," or "have," or can "get," but simply something we ARE, with love as an "expression of the soul," rather than a "want" or "need."
Kingma spends a fair amount of time examining the way we tend to push away love, through our efforts to force it into a particular "shape." To some, it may sound like she invests a lot of effort in taking to task the traditional concepts of "heterosexual marriage" and "till death do us part," but I believe those examples are merely used to illustrate our personalities' tendency to make love EXclusive, rather than INclusive. As she points out, we are "in relationship" with almost every person who comes through our lives, yet we tend to "limit" loving behavior to just a very few people. For many, she will cover some "uncomfortable ground," by making us look at the insecure ways in which we often tend to approach love, even while considering our motivations "noble" and "true."
The first half of the book doesn't actually cover a lot of "new territory," exploring love and the structure of relationships in ways that have previously been covered by other writers.Read more ›
Most Recent Customer Reviews
Recom. by Neale Donald Walsch as one of Top 8 Books That Change The World.Published 6 months ago by George Kagawa
Not very helpful or,deep,enough . Most things mentioned were obvious .Published 16 months ago by eve
This will completely change your view and experience of love! It's such a ground-breaking book! And it has such a poetic, soothing voice! Read morePublished on June 15, 2014 by Kundan Chhabra
This is a great book. I have shared it with others and everyone finds it insightful and valuable. I would highly recommend it.Published on January 15, 2014 by Fay Otto
I thought the book was very repetitive, and I could hardly wait to be finished with it.
However, it did provide food for thought within my own marriage relationship.
This is an excellent book for anyone exploring non-concensus ways of Being in relationships, and for anyone who is on their Soul Path & following their heart.Published on December 19, 2012 by Chehale