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Getting Past Your Breakup: How to Turn a Devastating Loss into the Best Thing That Ever Happened to You Paperback – May 5, 2009
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From Publishers Weekly
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Elliott delivers the goods with a book that can help anyone get past a broken heart, and be stronger for it The book provides solid, usable information told with compassionate understanding that really jumpstarts a heart that is on standby The tools are priceless, and the inspiration to come out on top is what really makes this book stand out in the ocean of other self-help titles out there.”
ForeWord This Week, 4/22/09
Each of the book's steps has been thoughtfully developed from the author's personal experience and her training and experience as a grief counselor.”
This book identifies the frequent mistakes people make during the early days of a breakup and explains how to avoid them. [Elliott] shows how to use the pain to grow, reassess your goals, and create a healthier life.”
Publisher’s Weekly, 6/8/09
Provides sound advice for those still driving by the ex’s house or obsessed with self-blame.”
Tell[s] people who have suffered relationship devastation how to get through the stages of grief associated with romantic implosion-and how to pick themselves up afterwards and come out of their distress better than they ever were before Elliott’s comments on the stages of grief, although scarcely new, can be helpful to just about anyone who feels devastated by the end of an intimate relationship.”
Midwest Book Review, June 2009
An effective book any general lending library will find popular.”
Midwest Book Review, June 2009
A recommended read for those looking for more reasons to embrace better health.”
About.com, Top Breakup Books,” 1/1/10
An excellent breakup book that assists not only in dealing with the shock of a relationship ending, but also how to move past the breakup to become a stronger, better person in spite/because of it. Topics such as dealing with breakup myths (I need closure!”) and boundaries (how do I not get into this situation ever again) are refreshing and well-suited to the tone and style. Highly recommended.”
A well thought out and surprisingly thorough book about dealing with a breakup With chapters on learning new boundaries and how to tell the kids, Elliot has covered topics that most books of this genre ignore outright. Chapter 2, The Rules of Disengagement, are a must-read for anyone who has ever suffered a bad breakup, particularly the list of items that keep folks stuck in their griefmost notably the concept of needing closure after a failed relationship Well written and thorough. Practical how-to’s in every chapter. Warm and friendly tone that never comes across as condescending or judgmental.”
YourTango.com, Top 5 Breakup Books of 2009,” 1/1/10
This practical book offers useful tips about how to get through the depressing post-breakup stages of loneliness and desolation. If you can't afford a therapist, this useful tome will help you take charge of your life instead of giving way to grief.”
From the devastation that comes at the end of a relationship, through the reeling, dealing and healing, Elliott worms her way around all aspects of a broken heart Getting Past Your Breakup will help you see a crystal-bright future.”
A breakup is the best time to change your life, and this book will tell you how to do it. It will serve as a road map for getting over your ex and putting your energy back where it belongs: on you! Stories and strategies will keep you inspired as you permanently get over the breakup, get your confidence back and open yourself up to finding the love of your life. You can do it with this book.”
Top Customer Reviews
For me, that person is Susan Elliott.
I stumbled upon her blog when I was at an all-time low in my life, having just undergone a heart-wrenching breakup that turned my world upside down and inside out. How could I allow someone to treat me so horribly in the name of love? Why didn't I recognize that I was being exploited? What was so damaged in me that I chose such a narcissistic mental case?
Susan's blog shed light on all of these questions and set me on a long journey toward becoming the person I was meant to be. My life is far better now than I ever could have imagined, spanning all areas, and she is in large part to thank.
This is not just a book about how to overcome your breakup -- it provides the resources to heal from your damaged past, recognize that you deserve better in life, learn to listen to and trust your instincts, and find real happiness. There's no hocus pocus here -- it's a smart book that executes key elements of cognitive psychology.
Simply put, this book is a life saver. Read it, apply it and be forever changed.
It is practical help, written with the compassion of someone who has gone through it, to guide you through those darkest hours and beyond. Like the best kind of friend, who is there for you even when you are not there for yourself, one who tells you the truth even when you don't want to hear it, her no-nonsense approach to both understanding where you are and guiding you with how to deal with it, is invaluable. There is no fluff here. Heart break and betrayal are soul destroying and the grieving and the healing processes need to be honoured.
Ms. Elliott provides the tools you need when you are in no place to think for yourself, the tools you need to get your life and yourself back, and the tools you need to navigate a better, more beautiful future for yourself when the time is right. And in the end she leaves you to spread your own wings and fly again - the best kind of teacher. She is an awesome woman, and this is an awesome book.
I will never let go of this one. I want it on my bookshelf, just in case. Not that I'm expecting ever to be in that space again. I can honestly say since coming across Susan Elliott's work I have become stronger, clearer, got back into my own life, and taken complete responsibility for my healing. And although I may suffer heartbreak again, I will not lose myself in the process.
I've not written a review before, but I can honestly say this helped me get through this like nothing else. Actually... not just get through it, I'm learning to thrive and really live my life. So, if you're going through a heartbreak, or know someone who is, get this. And go visit her blog. All the best to you.
The reason why this book is still so valuable to me is that it is more than a breakup book, it is a book about how to live your life as a happy and complete person. The book offers not only ways to get past your breakup, but ways to build your confidence, be happy single, and be happy in a relationship. The chapter on setting boundaries has been invaluable to me.
Another reason why I strongly, strongly recommend this book is that there is a companion website, created and maintained by the author, Susan Elliott. The website, gettingpastyourpast.com, is a great community of people and Susan writes amazing posts that expand on the concepts in the book. I can truly not express how much the website and book have helped me in the past year.
As a final note, another reason I appreciate this book is that it is appropriate for any gender, any age, and any sexuality. Susan is careful not to use heteronormative or gender specific language, and I really appreciate that. The book also takes into account that the readers may be at very different points in their lives-- from in college, to having kids, to beyond.
In conclusion, I can't recommend this book enough!
The writer had many exercises and suggestions for how to start attracting the life that we were meant to live and not the unhealthy familiarity and dysfunction of our childhoods! The most helpful exercise that I use today are the affirmations; taking time to affirm the things I want to be.. ie , "I am worthy. " This tool in conjunction with the inventory exercises and meditation has changed my life! If you have lived with an alcoholic parent, emotionally withdrawn parent or a narcissistic parent this book is for you...
I have recommended this book to several people. I would strongly recommend this book to those looking to correct the dysfunction and get answers for learning to love yourself first to attract the mate you want to have. I know you maybe thinking like I did that you love yourself because you are highly educated, have great friends, health conscious, etc. Truthfully, I learned I was not loving myself because I was staying in relationships where the partner was emotionally withdrawn; turns out my closest parent was the same way.Read more ›
Most Recent Customer Reviews
I enjoyed reading this book, it spoke to many incidents and situations in my life current and past. I would recommend to anyone going through a breakup, determining if their... Read morePublished 6 days ago by Amazon Customer
Amazing read!! Full of self-help, not just dealing with how to get over the break up!Published 14 days ago by Lisa J
This book is an excellent resource for anyone dealing with the devastating effects of a major breakup. I read it during my separation and it helped me tremendously! Read morePublished 15 days ago by Amazon Customer
This book provides great insight for anyone going through a rough break-up. I first discovered Susan's blog about 5 years ago and will occasionally return to the blog and her book... Read morePublished 25 days ago by Tara
for real, I'm overjoyed im single and get to make better choices! this book has taught me so much, it was exactly what I needed to read. Read morePublished 25 days ago by kimba
The book is written in a really practical way! The author is very broad in tackling almost all possible concerns you may have. Read morePublished 28 days ago by Tammy
I am struggling with a break up and have been for several months now. I thought I was over it and out of the blue the grief comes flooding back. Read morePublished 1 month ago by Daz
Good book with a lot of good advice. There are even exercises to do that will help people who are having a tough time getting past a breakup. Read morePublished 1 month ago by Patrick Watson