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God, Marriage, and Family: Rebuilding the Biblical Foundation (Second Edition) 2nd Edition
David W. Jones
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From the Publisher
More Books by Andreas Köstenberger from Crossway
Andreas J. Köstenberger (PhD, Trinity Evangelical Divinity School) is the director of the Center for Biblical Studies and research professor of New Testament and biblical theology at Midwestern Baptist Theological Seminary. He is a prolific author, distinguished evangelical scholar, and editor of the Journal of the Evangelical Theological Society. He is the founder of Biblical Foundations, a ministry devoted to restoring the biblical foundations of the home and the church. Köstenberger and his wife have four children.
Editorial Reviews
Review
“In breadth of coverage, thoroughness of learning, clarity of analysis and argument and, I think, soundness of judgment, this solid, lucid, pastorally angled treatise has no peer. Evangelicals who research, debate, teach, and counsel on gender, sex, marriage, and family will find it an endlessly useful resource. The easy mastery with which the author threads his way through forty years’ special pleadings gives this compendium landmark significance, and I recommend it highly.”
―J. I. Packer, Late Board of Governors' Professor of Theology, Regent College
“The special value of this book lies in its pervasive exposition of Scripture. We are adrift in a sea of speculation without this. I am thankful for the book. I plan to give it to my grown children.”
―John Piper, Founder and Teacher, desiringGod.org; Chancellor, Bethlehem College & Seminary; author, Desiring God
“Anything Andreas Köstenberger publishes is worthy of attention. His international education and experience, his teaching career, and his Christian character make him an author to be read with both care and anticipation. You may not agree with all his conclusions, but you’ll be better equipped for living and teaching about God, marriage, and Family. Sensible, balanced, and biblical, this is a sound and timely summary of the Bible’s teaching on some of the most basic and yet controversial topics in today’s world. I highly recommend it.”
―Mark Dever, Pastor, Capitol Hill Baptist Church, Washington, DC
“If you are looking for just another collection of saccharine clichés about shiny happy Christian families, then you might want to leave this volume on the book-store shelf. In an era when too many Christians listen more intently to television therapists than to the Bible on the question of the family, this could be one of the most significant books you ever read.”
―Russell Moore, President, The Ethics & Religious Liberty Commission of the Southern Baptist Convention
“The book is wide-ranging and reflects mature judgment in interpreting Scripture and applying it to life. The author does not avoid controversial issues, but in each case he treats the issues fairly with ample explanation of alternative views. This is an excellent book that deserves to be widely used.”
―Wayne Grudem, Distinguished Research Professor of Theology and Biblical Studies, Phoenix Seminary
“This is a superb book―the work of a gifted exegete whose feet are firmly planted in this world. God, Marriage, and Family addresses the daunting issues facing today’s Christians regarding marriage, divorce, remarriage, sexuality, children, contraception, abortion, singleness, sex roles, and leadership with radical biblical fidelity and practicality. If you want the Bible on these questions, this is the book! What a gift to today’s church!”
―R. Kent Hughes, Senior Pastor Emeritus, College Church, Wheaton, Illinois
“This volume should be not only on the shelf of every pastor in this land, but also in the syllabus of every course on marriage and the family taught in Christian colleges and seminaries. The author’s careful defense of traditional biblical values relating to family life demands a serious reading, especially by those who do not agree with him.”
―Daniel I. Block, Gunther H. Knoedler Professor Emeritus of Old Testament, Wheaton College; author, The Triumph of Grace and For the Glory of God
“The Christian looking for a brief, understandable, straightforward, intelligent, faithful presentation of what the Bible says about marriage, family, divorce, remarriage, homosexuality, abortion, birth control, infertility, adoption, and singleness need look no further.”
―Ligon Duncan, Chancellor and CEO, Reformed Theological Seminary
“While many popular treatments of marriage and the family are available, very few have explored with care and precision Scripture’s own teaching on these crucial subjects. Köstenberger does not avoid the hard contemporary issues of gender and sexuality but addresses them with sensitivity combined with keen biblical insight.”
―Bruce A. Ware, T. Rupert and Lucille Coleman Professor of Christian Theology, The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary
“With the current attack on marriage and family now raging at a fevered pitch, Köstenberger’s book is a vital resource that should be in the hands of every evangelical.”
―Tom Elliff, Pastor, First Southern Baptist Church, Del City, Oklahoma
“This volume is a treasure trove of biblical wisdom on matters pertaining to marriage, child-rearing, singleness, and sexuality. As Western society struggles to hold on to its social identity, this study reaffirms God’s will for self-understanding and family ties. Readers seeking the whole counsel of God on these matters will find enormous assistance here.”
―Robert W. Yarbrough, Professor of New Testament, Covenant Theological Seminary
“The book is especially valuable because it is remarkably clear and comprehensible, while at the same time reflecting deep and responsible research. I consistently found the conclusions to be sound and biblically faithful.”
―Thomas R. Schreiner, James Buchanan Harrison Professor of New Testament Interpretation, The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary
“Characterized by exemplary exegetical analysis, Köstenberger’s book is a refreshing and welcome addition to the current debate on marriage and the family. This outstanding work will help academicians, pastors, counselors, and anyone who genuinely seeks to understand God’s design from a biblical perspective.”
―Mary A. Kassian, author, Girls Gone Wise
“There has never been a greater need for a comprehensive, well-researched, and thoroughly biblical examination of the interrelated topics of marriage, family, and sexuality. Although not all will agree with each conclusion, Köstenberger has done the church a great service by providing this readable and eminently useful volume.”
―Gordon P. Hugenberger, Senior Minister, Park Street Church, Boston
“These days it is important for us to remember that God has something to say about marriage and family. With all of the competing voices insisting on new definitions and unbiblical patterns, Köstenberger has provided the Christian community with an invaluable resource. It will be perfect for the college or seminary classroom, for local church educational programs, and for families trying to conform their lives to the Word of God. I heartily recommend it.”
―Randy Stinson, Senior Vice President for Academic Administration and Provost, The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary
“At a time when our society is attempting to redefine the standards and values of marriage and family, Köstenberger has brought us back to the biblical foundation. He tackles some very difficult and politically sensitive issues in this book.”
―Bob Baker, Pastor of Pastoral Care, Saddleback Church, Lake Forest, California
“The unique contribution of God, Marriage, and Family is Köstenberger’s approach: he carefully traces God’s unfolding plan for marriage and family from creation through to the end. The true beauty of marriage and the family shines most brightly when one looks at these topics as they are developed throughout God’s entire story.”
―Richard W. Hove, Executive Director, Faculty Commons, Cru
About the Author
Andreas J. Köstenberger (PhD, Trinity Evangelical Divinity School) is the director of the Center for Biblical Studies and research professor of New Testament and biblical theology at Midwestern Baptist Theological Seminary. He is a prolific author, distinguished evangelical scholar, and editor of the Journal of the Evangelical Theological Society. He is the founder of Biblical Foundations, a ministry devoted to restoring the biblical foundations of the home and the church. Köstenberger and his wife have four children.
David W. Jones serves as professor of Christian ethics, director of the ThM program, and associate dean for graduate program administration at Southeastern Baptist Theological Seminary. Jones is also the author of more than a dozen articles that have appeared in various academic publications and a frequent speaker at churches, ministries, and Christian conferences. He currently resides near Raleigh, North Carolina, with his wife and five children.
Product details
- Publisher : Crossway; 2nd edition (May 5, 2010)
- Language : English
- Paperback : 400 pages
- ISBN-10 : 1433503646
- ISBN-13 : 978-1433503641
- Item Weight : 1.23 pounds
- Dimensions : 6 x 1 x 9 inches
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Best Sellers Rank:
#115,802 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- #495 in Christian Marriage (Books)
- #670 in Religious Studies (Books)
- #737 in Christian Family & Relationships
- Customer Reviews:
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Top reviews from the United States
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Particular strengths include the comprehensiveness of the book, as well as its integrative nature. Topics like marriage, singleness, gender, manhood, womanhood, child-bearing, dating, and the relation of family to the church are all critically related. Other essentially-related topics are ethical issues like divorce, remarriage, homosexuality, and polygamy. All these issues are considered together and from a biblical-theological standpoint. The authors clearly and concisely explain their reasoning in a way that should be comprehendible and accessible to the average person. If not read as a whole, the book is certainly a helpful resource, with a large section of recommended resources included in the back for further study.
The only weakness I might point out is some wordy introductions and conclusions that make the text read a little dry and almost textbook-like at times.
Overall, this resource is highly recommended, whether you agree with all of the authors' conclusions or not.
Second principal of this book is that it is showing us how to think God’s way. This book honestly discusses the Bible’s teachings on marriage and relationships, divorce, parenting, being single, homosexuality, birth control, abortion and church leadership.
Another principal of the book is that marriages and families are under attack and that we need to be intentional about growing a Biblical foundation because the world and Satan are trying to destroy marriages.
Surprisingly with the size of this book, you would think that there would have been something that did not set right with me. However, there was not anything that I was totally disagreed with in this book or have any questions about. The book was very straightforward and clear. The book was so exegetical of scripture, to argue against it would be arguing against God’s word in many cases.
This book is a great resource for a pastor. The lessons that I learned from this book is that it is a great resource for further studies into a specific area of marriage and family. I will turn back to the book constantly during my life in ministry. My favorite chapter was chapter eight, Requiring the Wisdom of Solomon: Special Issues Related to Family Part Two.
In this chapter, the author gives us 21 questions for a prospective wife or husband. I thought this was very insightful to sit down with your child and ask their potential spouse these questions. Not only are you displaying what should be important when choosing a spouse, you could be uncovering potential problems in the future for their marriage.
The next lesson that I learned from that chapter was marks of manhood on page 154. Here we get insight on what a Biblical Man of God should look like. I believe that this is especially important in today’s culture. Also, the insight that we gain on spiritual warfare on pages 160-63 was great for me to learn for my own life.
This book is a great resource and provides many lists and charts to help with understanding. I specifically appreciate the outline of Proverbs 31 on page 40. I believe that this is very insightful on what we should be looking for in a Godly wife. I also appreciated the outline of Proverbs on training up a child on page 95.
Topics addresses are as follows: 1) Biblical theology of marriage; 2) the nature of marriage and the role of sex; 3) Biblical theology of family; 4) whether to have children; 5) methods in child-rearing; 6) the gift of singleness; 7) homosexuality; 8) divorce and remarriage; 9) family-related qualifications for church leadership. The premise, of course, is that "human sexuality and relationships ... [are] to be rooted in the eternal will of the Creator as expressed in the way God made men and women" (269).
I purchased the book initially because someone I know well has been divorced and wondered to me whether the Lord permits remarriage in her case. The chapter on divorce and remarriage helped, and the endnotes and bibliographies showed me where else to look for Christian wrestling with the biblical teaching on this topic. Notes and bibliographies are helpful if not comprehensive on the other topics also.
This second edition is not only a reprint; it is a re-working of much of the material in light of the pertinent literature released between 2004 and 2010. It also addresses a few topics not covered in the first edition, e.g., parenting teenager.
If you're not familiar with Kostenberger, he's a theologically-conservative Austrian-American Southern Baptist whose expertise lies primarily in the areas of hermeneutics and Johannine literature & theology, though his academic interests have occasionally taken him in other directions. He also speaks publicly on issues of family for an organization called Biblical Foundations. His conclusions, as one would expect, are conservative; but he argues for them with aplomb.
Don't ignore this book.
Top reviews from other countries





„Die in Genesis 1-3 dargelegte Schöpfungsordnung kann nicht hoch genug eingeschätzt werden.“
Der Autor
Andreas Kostenberger (* 1958) ist renommierter Neutestamentler und eben vom Midwestern Seminary „gechartert“ worden. Es freut mich immer zu sehen, wenn ein 60-Jähriger einen geradlinigen Kurs verfolgt und mit seiner Frau zusammen auftritt. Nicht zufällig ist das Buch der Frau und den vier Kindern gewidmet. Bei einzelnen Themen, die ein vertieftes medizinisches Fachwissen nötig machen, hat er sich in diesem Buch mit Experten verstärkt.
Das Anliegen
Im kurzen ersten Kapitel legt der Autor sein Anliegen dar, was auch der Untertitel zum Ausdruck bringt: Das biblische Fundament wieder aufzubauen. Es sei das erste Mal in der Geschichte des Westens in den letzten 2000 Jahren, dass die Christen ihre Sicht der Sexualethik wieder von Grund auf entwickeln, herleiten, nachweisen und verteidigen müssen. Das offenbart eine realistische Einschätzung der gesellschaftlichen Lage. Zudem sieht er innerhalb der Evangelikalen ein bedeutendes Manko an dieser Grundlagenarbeit. Es werden auf der Symptomseite jede Menge von Themen adressiert, die jedoch alle die Methoden und Techniken im Auge haben (besserer Sex, bessere Kommunikation, gelingende Erziehung etc.).
Auch wenn es nicht das Ziel des Buches ist die gesellschaftliche Situation ausführlich zu skizzieren, (ich empfehle dazu die Werke von Denny Burk "What Is the Meaning of Sex?" und Albert Mohler "We Cannot Be Silent"), stellt er in den einzelnen Kapiteln immer wieder aktuelle Bezüge her.
Das Leseerlebnis
Das Buch verfügt über einen durchgängig leserfreundlichen Ansatz. Das beginnt beim Kapitelanfang, wo das Thema kurz umrissen wird. Zudem finden sich vorab, zwischendurch und am Schluss auch in einzelnen Teilthemen laufend Zusammenfassungen. Diese schriftlichen Schlussfolgerungen werden durch Tabellen unterstützt.
Zweitens hebt sich dieses Buch durch eine angemessene Länge hervor. Die einzelnen Abschnitte endeten jeweils dann, als meine Aufmerksamkeit nachzulassen begann. Das bedeutet aber nicht, dass bei umstrittenen Themen die nötige Tiefe fehlte. In Kapitel 11 zur Scheidung und Wiederheirat werden die einzelnen einander widersprechenden Auslegungsvarianten zuerst besprochen, bevor eine eigene Stellungnahme abgegeben wird.
Drittens finden sich ausführliche Fussnoten. Wann immer ich in den Fussnotenapparat wechselte, blieb ich einen Augenblick hängen, weil weitere, hochinteressante Hinweise gegeben wurden. Es finden sich dazu umfassende Literaturverzeichnisse, welche nicht nur die wichtigsten Werke, sondern auch relevante Aufsätze in theologischen Zeitschriften miteinschliessen.
Viertens und wahrscheinlich am zentralsten ist die saubere Vorgehensweise bezüglich der Auslegung biblischer Texte und einzelner Bibelstellen. Wenn Kostenberger in Kapitel 10 alle AT- und NT-Stellen zur Homosexualität zusammenträgt, bettet er sie stets im engeren und weiteren Zusammenhang ein. Dazu trägt er die wichtigen exegetischen Argumente fachgerecht zusammen und füllt die Begriffe nicht aus dem eigenen Erleben und pragmatischen Erwägungen, sondern von ihrem biblischen Gehalt her. Oder er geht zuerst durch den gesamten (!) Epheserbrief, um die Argumente aus den christlichen Haustafeln zusammenzutragen. Noch nie hatte ich bisher über den Zusammenhang der Anweisungen an Ehemann, Ehefrau und Kindern nachgedacht, indem ich sie auf dem Hintergrund des geistlichen Kampfes (Eph 6,10-18) ausgelegt habe.
Einzig bei den Anwendungen – z. B. zum Thema Erziehung – bleibt er meines Erachtens zu holzschnittartig. Er bringt zwar auch hier Struktur rein. Doch die Hinweise bleiben sehr knapp und wirken zuweilen etwas aufgesetzt. Allerdings ist dies auch nicht der Hauptzweck des Buches. Gerade im Kapitel über Kindererziehung fand ich drei wichtige Hinweise auf a) Kennzeichen geistlicher Reife bei Heranwachsenden (Paul Tripp), b) 13 Merkmale eines Mannes (Albert Mohler) und c) 21 Fragen für den zukünftigen Ehepartner (Doug Wilson).
Der Aufbau
Das erste Kapitel dient der Herleitung der Dringlichkeit. Es fehlt den Evangelikalen an einer zusammenhängenden, auf den Aussagen von Altem und Neuem Testament aufbauenden Sichtweise zu Ehe und Familie (wohlgemerkt, beider Testamente!).
Das zweite und dritte Kapitel war für mich der hellste Teil des gesamten Buches. Dort werden nämlich sämtliche Aussagen zur Ehe im Alten und Neuen Testament zusammengetragen. Dem schliessen sich die Kapitel über Sexualität (4.) sowie der Theologie der Familie aus AT und NT (5./6.) an.
Auf diesem Fundament können nun spezifische Themen angesprochen und behandelt werden: Die Frage nach Kindern (7.) sowie der Weisheit in der Erziehung (8.). Nicht unterschlagen und genügend berücksichtigt wird das für den Westen immer wichtiger werdende Thema des Alleinseins (9.).
Natürlich muss auch die Frage nach gleichgeschlechtlicher Sexualität (10.) sowie nach Scheidung und Wiederheirat (11.) angesprochen werden.
Die zwei letzten thematischen Kapitel widmen sich dem Komplex Familie und Kirche, wobei es um die Qualifikation um Führung in der Gemeinde (12.) sowie die Integration von Familie in der Kirche (13.) geht.
Wie es sich für ein durch und durch „getaktetes“ Werk gehört, schliesst es mit einer Synthese (14.). Dem schliesst sich der ausführliche Fussnotenapparat und eine umfassende Lektüreliste pro Kapitel an.
Was mich inhaltlich besonders angesprochen hat (Pos = Positionsnummern Kindle)
1. Die doppelte Gefahr für den Ehemann, bedingt durch den Sündenfall: Die Frau durch Passivität in die aktive Rolle zu stossen oder sie aktiv zu dominieren (Pos. 454)
2. Die Zusammenstellung der Entartung menschlicher Sexualität durch den Sündenfall: Polygamie statt Monogamie; Scheidung statt Dauerhaftigkeit; Ehebruch statt Bundestreue; Homo- statt Heterosexualität; Sterilität statt Fruchtbarkeit; die Auflösung von Rollen/Merkmalen der beiden Geschlechter. (Pos. 540)
3. Eine ausführliche Liste an Merkmalen einer gottesfürchtigen Frau anhand von Sprüche 31 (Pos. 741)
4. Der Durchgang durch den gesamten Epheserbrief im Hinblick auf die Theologie der Familie (Pos. 1022ff).
5. John Stotts Definition von Ehe: Exklusive, heterosexuelle Bundebeziehung eines Mannes mit einer Frau, verordnet und besiegelt durch Gott, dem das Verlassen der Eltern vorangegangen ist. Es erfüllt sich in der sexuellen Einheit, wird entwickelt durch eine stabile gegenseitige Unterstützung und wird normalerweise durch Kinder gekrönt. (Pos 1356)
6. Daniel Blocks Aufsatz zu der Familie im AT. Ich frage mich, wie es heute möglich wäre, als Grossfamilie mit Verwandten und Alleinstehenden, wieder zusammen zu leben.
7. Eine Aufzählung der Pflichten der Kinder gegenüber den Eltern (Pos. 1730)
8. Eine Aufzählung von Charaktereigenschaften, die ein gottesfürchtiges Haus (durch Gottes Gnade) den Kindern vermitteln kann (Pos. 1818ff)
9. Acht Steigerungsformen elterlicher Disziplinierung anhand der Sprüche (Pos. 2777ff)
10. Pro-homosexuelle exegetische Argumente (Zusammenstellung, Pos. 4318) sowie Robert Gagnons Buch „The Bibble and Homosexual Practice: Texts and Hermeneutics“.
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