- Hardcover: 272 pages
- Publisher: Tyndale House Publishers, Inc. (August 18, 2010)
- Language: English
- ISBN-10: 1414335881
- ISBN-13: 978-1414335889
- Product Dimensions: 5.8 x 1 x 8.5 inches
- Shipping Weight: 13.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
- Average Customer Review: 25 customer reviews
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#1,495,779 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- #3810 in Christian Marriage (Books)
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Great Parents, Lousy Lovers: Discover How to Enjoy Life with Your Spouse While Raising Your Kids Hardcover – August 18, 2010
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Great Parents, Lousy Lovers by Dr. Gary Smalley and Ted Cunningham ($17.99, Tyndale House Publishers, softcover) is another one of those books that will not be officially released until September. Dr. Smalley has authored sixteen books on family relationships and Cunningham is a pastor who co-authored three of them with him. Both have been guests on leading radio and television shows, sharing their expertise. Filled with wit, wisdom, and practical advice, the good news is that partners can be great parents and still maintain a healthy love life to ensure a happy marriage which they regard as essential to good parenting. Readers will learn how to maintain a proper balance and to avoid or deal with the frustration and fatigue that the demands of parenting often impose. If this describes your marriage, put this book on your reading list. --Bookviews.com, June 28, 2010
From the Inside Flap
You might be a great parent but a lousy lover if you and your spouse . . .
- let your kids sleep in your bed with you
- can’t remember the last time you went on an actual date
- are regularly late to events and activities because you are coming from other events and activities
- feel more like cooks, maids, or chauffeurs than lovers
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Yes, normally I have to post my book blogger reviewer status disclosure because of some sort of FTC law or whatnot. Not so with this book. This time I'm disclosing that I am a reviewer of this book because of my husband seriously took one look at the title of this book and started in on the questions! He was pretty worried that I felt the need for this book and paid money for this book.
As a matter of fact, in the book Mr. Cunningham mentions that his wife felt the book should have been titled "Great Parents, Great Lovers." After the intense discussion with my own spouse, I'm thinking that Mrs. Cunningham was right.
But anyway, on to the actual review!
As I've already mentioned, this book was a huge conversation starter. Yes, I discussed this book at length with my husband, but I also ended up in conversations with a few close friends, too. Without exception, we all had interesting talks about what truly makes a great parents and what makes a great lover.
As far as the book itself is concerned, overall it is fairly generalized. Not every scenario can reach the depths of every single relationship. The book does list two coauthors. Dr. Gary Smalley is a renowned expert on relationships but his voice in this book is fairly limited. At times Dr. Smalley does dole out advice, but on the whole his voice is limited to a sort of "Yeah, what he said" sort of responses. At times I wanted more information and helpful hints.
It is primarily a book written by Pastor Ted Cunningham. Cunningham's training? Well, as a pastor he has clearly been in countless marriage counseling sessions. As an author and relationship expert? To be honest, at times I felt his writing was trite and the jokes were flippant. For example, on Page 205 is this little ditty by Cunningham: "My wife is the type of woman who knows when the thermostat is set on seventy or seventy-one degrees at home. One degree makes a difference for her. And all the women said, "Amen!"" What in the heck does that last part mean? Perhaps a good editor should have taken a bit more of the...ahem...personality out of Cunningham's writing?
On the whole I do give this book 4 out of 5 stars. Is it the best book ever written about relationships and parenting? Not a chance. However is it a catchy, quick read that is sure to provoke discussions with your spouse? Most likely yes. And most importantly, Dr. Smalley and Ted Cunningham do truly try to bring Christ into each and every teaching point in the book. And if there is one thing couples need more of these days, I can agree that it is more Christ in their marriage.
Disclosure (once again): I received this book complimentary as a book blogger, not to hurt my husband's feelings. The opinions about this book are all mine.
LOOK at the title of this book!! Doesn't that just make you want to read it? I was intrigued by its title wondering...if I fell into this category. Dr. Smalley and Ted Cunningham are great writers and have a wealth of knowledge and information that they share in this book. The book is balanced with information, descriptions of what they are talking about and stories that will make you laugh...OUTLOUD!! It is not a 'fix our sex life' book it is a 'fix myself, fix my relationship with God' book which in turn fixes your relationship with your spouse.
I believe that this book is a must read for every parent, whether you are new to the game or have been in it for a while. I would even suggest that empty nesters read it and gain a new passion for their spouse. These two men are full of insight from their many years in the counseling world and I believe cover just about every 'couple type'.
I was impressed with how easy it was to read. The book does not 'yell' at you for having slipped off the bandwagon of being a wonderful spouse but rather, it encourages you to start today and do what is right. I liked the description of Ted Cunningham's discussion with his daughter when she was three about their home 'I need you [Corynn] to know that there is only one queen in this home and you are not her.' As Cunningham further describes when you start treating your wife like the queen she will in turn start treating you like the king. What a HUGE impact this would have on many of our homes if we treated our spouses like the king or queen instead of our children.
This book has been added to my list of recommended books for people in need. I hope that a great many of my friends will choose to read this book for themselves and see how God can change their family life and reawaken the passion and love for their spouse.
I was given a free copy of this book for review purposes by Tyndale Publishers. Thanks!!