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Grunts Mass Market Paperback – August 1, 1995
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Here's the quote that sums it up:
p.451 "That does it!" Oderic said, puffing smoke-rings that lurched, lopsided, into the air." I'm going to tell the REAL story about halflings,orcs, the Dark Lord, and the final victory. The halflings are going to be cheery and moral and know their place; the orcs will be cowardly, and they'll lose; there won't be ANY mention of arms trading, and at the end, the Dark Lord will be male, and VERY, VERY dead!"
If you enjoy Tolkien, but find some of his attitudes towards women and the 'lower classes' offputting, and if you find the unthinking repetition of these attitudes in every Tolkien imitator annoying, this is the book for you.
Two caveats: 1.)These are more warhammer orcs than Tolkien's . If you play the games, you'll have a much better chance of keeping all the orc characters straight in your mind.Read more ›
I'm in the first camp, and I hope you'll join me. At the very least, heed my opinion on the second camp- too many people try to take this book seriously. A quote on the cover says it all, "moves at a good clip and delivers plenty of gags". And that's what this book is all about- a nice quick story with lots of gags.
And they're great gags at that. Sure, the story isn't particularly solid. And there's nothing in the book that'll have people pulling out comparisons to Tolkein-esque visuals or Salvatore-esque characterizations... but that's sort of the point. Think of this book as the "Three Stooges" of the Fantasy genre, and you're on the right track.
I particularly reccomend this book to anyone who's ever played Dungoens and Dragons, known someone who played it, or laughed at someone who was playing it. So many elements here seem to be ripped right from late-night, caffiene-enhanced, power-gaming D&D scenarios that I'm surprised the Roleplaying community hasn't adopted this work.
Grab this book if you're a Fantasy fan who wants a truly lighter take on the genre- complete with lots of cursing, sex, and gore just for flair. Grab it if you're a D&D fanatic who's taken part in one too many sour campaigns. But mostly, just grab it. It's a great twist on the genre, it's a terribly fun read, and at least a few of the gags are going to be worth the price of admission alone.
This is when I realized that orcs are the perfect marines for this book. I mean, being an evil sorcerer, who would you send in to kill off a dragon? It sure wouldn't be your most prized possessions, but the lowliest of your henchman, and usually your most prolific ones as well. Come on, we all know that orcs breed like rabbits, so that's got to be the first choice of henchman. All the bad guys use cannon fodder, so it only makes sense that we would see the orcs in charge.
Well, all in all, I loved this book, from the first paragraph to the last. I would recommend this to any fantasy reader out there. Actually, I think I just did.
Along with this arsenal, orcs also acquire the attitude and language of marines, and use modern military tactics in different combat situations. The battles between the orc marines and elfs, paladins and halflings is the high point of the book, filled with one liners like “pass me another elf, this one is split”, and when a general hears he is charged with crimes against humanity he answers: “thank you.”
The reader should be warned that the book revels in it’s black humor and political incorrectness. The violence is very graphic, as are the rape jokes.
I liked the idea of Grunts, but it seemed to me like a joke stretched too far. After the initial novelty and baddass factor of ORC MARINES elapses, the reader is left with unidimensional characters whose motivations change just because the plot needs them to, wooden plots and deus ex machina moments. Out of nowhere, a race of sentient space insects shows up, out of nowhere they are defeated. It was a bit of a struggle to read all the way through.
Grunts seemed for me like a hyperactive child babbling whatever crazy idea came to her mind. At first it is charming, but soon you are staring at your watch wondering when it will end.
Most Recent Customer Reviews
Crude, rude and overall fun but hey they're Orc Marines so what did you expect? The author takes just about every high-fantasy trope and tosses them into a blender with modern... Read morePublished 16 days ago by Karl Grant
What is a Grunt? What is an Ork? Take your High Epic where good wins and the cannon-fodder complains! Read morePublished 25 days ago by destrey
So very, very funny. A great read for lovers of fantasy stories or anybody that wants to read a great story. Mad, mad genius.Published 6 months ago by L.T.
If you are a fan of fantasy, you may have found yourself at times feeling less than satisfied with the standard fare. Read morePublished 6 months ago by JC A. Lai Andurin
A great read, funny as hell, and makes you feel for the orcsPublished 6 months ago by james browne, jj
Grunts is, simply put, the single greatest comedy fantasy novel ever written. As a huge fan of Terry Pratchett, I am excluding several of his books from the prior sentence, because... Read morePublished 10 months ago by David Relyea
For the first time, read about the Last of the Last Battles between Good and Evil from the Orc point of view. Still LMAO!Published 11 months ago by Walter E. Starr
I have seen a lot more negative reviews about this book than I expected since I totally loved it. If you are looking for Hemmingway or Shakespeare class prose then you are in the... Read morePublished 12 months ago by Rick Westbrock