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Healing the Wounded Heart: The Heartache of Sexual Abuse and the Hope of Transformation Paperback – March 1, 2016
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From the Back Cover
Find hope and healing in the wake of sexual abuse
If you are one of the millions of people who have suffered abuse in the form of rape, incest, molestation, sexting, sexual bullying, unwanted advances, pornography, and more, you know that hope doesn't come easy and healing can seem impossible. Dan Allender has been there--and he's spent twenty-five years helping other victims of sexual abuse walk the path toward wholeness.
Never minimizing the pain or offering pat spiritual answers that don't truly address the problem, Allender calls evil evil and lights the way to renewed joy, one step at a time.
"For all those seeking healing, and those who bring healing to others, this is an immensely powerful book filled with wisdom, understanding, and experience--and above all filled with hope. I highly recommend it!"--John Eldredge, author of Wild at Heart and Beautiful Outlaw
"Through Dan's skillful and tender writing, I've been given a vision for how to love and walk well with the members of my community whose stories have been marked by sexual abuse. I'm so very thankful for his gentle, prophetic voice, and for the many ways his words have been healing and life-giving for generations."--Shauna Niequist, author of Savor and Bread & Wine
"Brilliant and accessible, Allender has given us this incredible gift: a book that not only helps us understand the potent impacts and effects of sexual abuse but offers hope and a roadmap to healing. Thank you! I am thrilled this book exists."--Wm. Paul Young, author of The Shack, Cross Roads, and EVE
"This book is like Dan--compelling, liberating, and a gentle salve that will transform wounds into holy scars. This book will become a classic for generations."--Dr. Dennis Rainey, president of FamilyLife
Dan B. Allender is professor of counseling psychology and former president of The Seattle School of Theology and Psychology in Seattle, Washington. He travels and speaks extensively on sexual abuse recovery, love and forgiveness, worship, and other related topics. Allender is the author of fifteen books, including The Wounded Heart, and coauthor of God Loves Sex.
About the Author
Dan B. Allender (MS, Barry College; MDiv, Westminster Theological Seminary; PhD, Michigan State University) is professor of counseling psychology and former president of The Seattle School of Theology and Psychology in Seattle, Washington. He travels and speaks extensively on sexual-abuse recovery, love and forgiveness, worship, and other related topics. Allender is the author of fifteen books, including The Wounded Heart, and is coauthor of God Loves Sex.
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Top customer reviews
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Unlike a lot of workbooks, this one does not directly overlap the book. In other words, it's not the same exact questions mentioned in the book, just re-printed with lines for you to write your answers. These are well organized (mostly open-ended) questions designed to make you think about what you've read and how to implement that in your life. It also asks very pointed questions designed to make you look back at your life with honesty and openness. You have to be willing to be truthful and face the past or this workbook will not work for you.
Also, the workbook is divided into two sections, the first half being for the recovering victim, and the second half for the spouse or partner. It's designed to help your spouse understand what you're going through in order to be able to support and assist you on this very hard journey. If you don't have a spouse or partner that will go through this with you, I very strongly suggest you find a close friend or other ally to walk this path with you. Even with the best ally, it is not an easy. But in the end, it is worth so much more than you imagine.
I was hesitant to read this book because so often ignorance is bliss. However, God has brought some people into my life who have suffered from sexual abuse. As much as I want to pretend these horrors do not really exist, I know they do and I should seek to understand if I can help the healing process in any way.
This book is really long and in depth. I skipped some of the chapters that didn't seem to apply as much. And a few chapters I skimmed just because they were so hard to read. The book seemed balanced in that it talked about the subject from so many different angles. I learned about the brain and how it is affected by sexual abuse. I learned about why people behave certain ways after abuse. I learned about different kinds of sexual abuse and signs that they are occurring. And in the end, I was left with some hope. I think I also gained some understanding as to the depth of the pain these people have gone through so that I can be more empathetic to their current struggles. And while the author says that these victims won't be fully healed until heaven, God can begin to heal, and He can use me in that process.
This isn't a light read or a fun read, but I would recommend it. We are surrounded by sexual abuse, and I feel like we need to ask God what our part is in ending it and supporting those who have already endured it.
I received this book for free in exchange for an honest review.