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Help Me Say Goodbye: Activities for Helping Kids Cope When a Special Person Dies Paperback – February 23, 1999

4.5 out of 5 stars 50 customer reviews

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Product Details

  • Paperback: 32 pages
  • Publisher: Fairview Press; 1 edition (February 23, 1999)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1577490851
  • ISBN-13: 978-1577490852
  • Product Dimensions: 7.1 x 0.2 x 10.1 inches
  • Shipping Weight: 5.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
  • Average Customer Review: 4.5 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (50 customer reviews)
  • Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #19,907 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)

Customer Reviews

Top Customer Reviews

By A Customer on October 16, 2000
Format: Paperback
My 5 yr old son was having a hard time coping with losing his mother to cancer. A friend recommended this book, and I thought it was abosultely wonderful. My son, who couldn't or wouldn't open up about his feelings, took to this book like he would a favorite coloring book, letting all his feeling and perceptions just flow out right there on paper. I bought it to help HIM, but it helped ME just as much--I wept when I looked at what he had drawn. After he finished it, he forgot about the book for a while. So I took it and put it in our hope chest for him to look back on years from now, as a keepsake and memory of the wonderful woman who brought him into this world, and who brought us both so much happiness.
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Format: Paperback
I purchased this book for my daughter and now also plan to purchase it for my niece and nephew. After reading the other reviews I knew I needed to get this book and set it aside for when one or both of her grandparents pass away.

Basically this book is a place for your child to express what they might not be able to do by saying but can do so in drawing. Each page has a few sentences to help your child write or draw "out" their feelings of loss onto each page. I am even thinking of also in a blank notebook doing this as well for my daughter to see that adults too grieve and miss loved ones.

A few pages:

1st page reads:

Some things, like sand and sea shells, don't change, but people change. Is there someone you loved who has changed? Has this someone been sick or hurt? Draw you special someone.

Page 16:

Sometimes, when a special person dies, we feel like it is our fault. We think this person died because of something we did or didn't do. Death is not something you can control. It is not your fault that your special person died. Draw about some of the things you cannot control.

Page 24:

When a loved one dies, birthdays, holidays, and other special days can be very hard. You might feel mixed up, scared, angry, and sad all over again. On these days, you may want to plant a tree or do something in memory of your special someone. Draw or write your ideas.

Pages 26 & 27

Keep something that belonged to your special person so you can touch it and look at it and remember. Write or draw the things you have kept that belonged to your special person. Think about why these things are important to you.

Do you have a good box to keep memories in?
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Format: Paperback
This is a very good book for young children who have lost a special person. There are many suggestions for remembering this person and pages for writing down feelings as you and youngster explore this book.I used this book to explain to my four year old grandson about the loss of his father to murder. Put special pictures of my son and grandson on front pages so he could always nave his special pictures to look at whenever he missed his dad.
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Format: Paperback
What a beautiful book. My 2 girls are watching their father slowly die of ALS--Lou Gehrig's disease. It is a painfully slow and tortious death in that he has slowly lost the use of his legs, arms and can no longer speak or eat by mouth. I used this book to help get them through this process. The art therapy approach honestly helped my 6 year old explain things she could not verbalize and the 8 year old enjoyed it for a type of relaxation. Thank you
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Format: Paperback
This book is an absolute must have for anyone with a child who is about to face the loss of someone special and close -- due to an illness, accident, or age, -- Children have such difficulty expressing their emotions because in times of such sorrow and anxiety, they are experiencing things they have NEVER felt before. They are confused, distraught, fearful, and so terribly hurt - and when all the adults around them are suffering too -- it makes it all the harder to discuss such delicate and sensitive things -- we want to be strong for them, we don't want our angst to invoke their own.....

But we don't realize that hiding our emotions teaches them to hide their own, or worse, feel theirs are WRONG.....

That is why books like this are so precious and so very priceless -- because it gives the child an outlet to express themselves in the way they do best -- their own drawings, - and their own writings..... not only are these activities that children enjoy - it offers them such amazing therapy - a release.... It encourages them to express and emote, reflect, feel, cope, and most of all -- through creating what is essentially a journal of the child's journey through the impending loss, to the death, to the mourning that follows ---- it gives your child a keepsake for relection, - spiritiual growth, emotional strength, - and a grand tribute and memoir of the intense love and connection they shared - a book that will honor their love, -- and remind them as they grow through the years of the strength and courage they found within themselves, -- and the compassion and tenderness that blossoms from these things.
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