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Hero in a Halfling: A Humorous Fantasy Adventure (Epik Fantasy Book 1) Kindle Edition
|Length: 324 pages||Word Wise: Enabled||Enhanced Typesetting: Enabled|
|Page Flip: Enabled||
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|Book 1 of 3 in Epik Fantasy|
|Age Level: 13 - 18||Grade Level: 9 - 12|
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From the Author
From the Inside Flap
"What do you mean?" Epik said, giving the old halfling sitting at the bar a look before returning to his work.
"What I mean is, humans--they haven't a lick o' sense. See, the smartest of the lot goes around claiming some piece of land is his. Convinces a bunch o' others it's true. Even convinces 'em that if they live and work on it, they have to pay some sorta pittance. Poor idiots! Only gets worse from there."
"Yeah?" Epik asked, smiling.
The Hog's Toot Saloon was quiet that night, except for Fatty.
"Then the king, as he now calls himself, gets this notion that he wants some other piece of land down the way. Somehow convinces the others o' this too. Tells 'em it's his by rights or whatnots. Gets 'em to fight the other group o' idiots werkin' for the other king. Damn fools! Most get their heads chopped clean off."
"Clean off, lad. They'll never take, I tell you. Be wiped each other off the planet, in the end, leaving the land to us halflings. And the elves."
"What about the dwarves?" Epik asked absentmindedly.
Fatty Cheapskate looked at him, dumbfounded. It wasn't his real name, but nicknames in the Bog tended to be quite literal. He was a fat old halfling with a mutton chop beard--and he didn't pay for much if he could help it.
Fatty took a swig of ale and blew a smoke ring at Epik's face.
"Lad, have you not been listening to a word I said?" Epik pursed his lips; he had caught a few words. "All these blitherin' idiots who go about fighting for fun, they aren't meant for this world. Won't last but a blink of the perennial eye, as it's called. Take us halflings; we know how to feud the right way. Never see us goin' about messin' with swords or crossy bows and whatnots. We fights with our words. Doesn't matter if I don't like the way another halfling looks or smells or thinks. I'll give him a right talkin' to, then he can go on thinkin' or smellin' or--erm-- lookin' somewhere else."
- File Size : 6146 KB
- Word Wise : Enabled
- ASIN : B073SM1ZJT
- Print Length : 324 pages
- Publication Date : October 5, 2017
- Text-to-Speech : Not enabled
- Enhanced Typesetting : Enabled
- Language: : English
- X-Ray : Enabled
- Screen Reader : Supported
- Lending : Enabled
- Best Sellers Rank: #244 Free in Kindle Store (See Top 100 in Kindle Store)
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