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Showing 1-10 of 73 reviews(Verified Purchases). See all 89 reviews
on February 5, 2016
Even if you are not a Christian, the psychology of self and relationships with others is excellent. This is not a good book for people who refuse to be honest with themselves about themselves. If you are stuck in life, this book offers practical insight into owning yourself, learning about yourself, and authentically connecting with other people. If you are not in a place where you can be honest with yourself, this book will be a waste of time. This book uses Bible references and Christian principles heavily. But, concerning the Christian aspect, a non Christian can easily ignore the God talk and walk away with tremendous personal and relational growth. This book is about you and how to own yourself. It takes a courageous person to apply the principles of this book to themselves. I found the challenge rewarding. Difficult, but long lasting. This is no "power of positive thinking" book. It is a "be honest with yourself about yourself" book. An excellent guide for Christians and non-Christians alike.
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on December 12, 2016
After the Boundaries series, this is the best resource for me thus far. Excellent material that really opens up the biblical basis of traditional family and why it works. In utilizing this material, I've grown to understand not only my own short comings but those of my parents (and theirs) and why they were present in my childhood but not exactly involved on the day to day. Very eye opening
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on March 31, 2012
As I licensed professional counselor I've begun using the insights learned through this book to aid in determining where my clients are broken. Initially, I found the book valuable and right on in helping me to see my areas of brokeness and how they relate to relationships. Many times we continue with lifelong patterns that don't work because we don't stop to evaluate. This book provides the reader with tools to evaluate his life. I know there's a famous quote that goes something like, "an unexamined life is not worth living". I agree. Read this book, examine your life, and then really live.
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on March 27, 2015
This is an AWESOME book. I am learning some great lessons on intimacy. Not surprising, as John Townsend is a wise teacher. The 'story' at the beginning is really good for making the more difficult concepts easier to relate to, and sum up what we learn from chapter to chapter. Not an easy or quick read, but definitely worth your time if you have trouble developing close relationships. It is helping me see why that is the case with me.
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on September 30, 2015
Maybe the best book I have ever read in my life. I have struggled with destructive patterns my whole life and this book has opened my eyes to the root cause of the issues I face. I would say this author is right on point, it literally felt like he was reading the diary I never wrote. So grateful for the clarity and knowledge that this book has bestowed up me. It will live a long life in my hands and be used thoroughly to help me continue this journey of growth that I have embarked on.
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on June 4, 2017
This is a difficult read. If you want to work through some unmet needs and issues in your own life, this book is a great resource. Dr. Townsend uses Scripture and metaphorical stories to explain how issues that we may experience have formed. (If you are not interested in Scripture, don't rule this out. He doesn't preach at the reader, but simply gives Biblical foundation to his explanations.) We may hide from others because of past hurts (also explained as unmet needs). He explains the helpful time of hiding and the harmful time of hiding. If you really examine yourself as you read through this book, it will take some time to go through, but if you want to see an improvement in your thought life towards other people and your relationships with other people, this book will definitely help!
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on August 12, 2015
This book reaches for the parts of our hearts, character and past that hides from our own awareness but still is in pain. Awesome book. Not "religious" or "6 easy steps" or " mastering principles!" It is a book that gives heartfelt insight and wisdom to help the broken parts of us get free. Mark D.
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on August 4, 2006
I was gripped by anxiety and panic attacks since my early teens, but didn't realize it until my mid-40s. Once I hit bottom in my relationships, and had to face the facts, I turned to Dr. Townsend's book and found the answer. My early childhood trauma had imprisoned me in a childish emotion that I had to overcome.

He not only helps you recognize where and how this can grow from early childhood, but describes specific steps to healing, including the spiritual aspects as well as how to recognize old habits that built up as a defense against the pain.

I highly recommend this to anyone that had a wrenching early childhood experience (i.e. alcoholic parents, abandonment or abuse)and wants to begin to live life in close relationships rather than loneliness, shame and guilt.
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on January 29, 2017
I did not like this book and was unable to get through the second chapter. The first chapter was good but then the author went all over the place talking about characters that you could not remember from the first chapter. I stopped reading it and gave it to a friend who did not like it either. I read Safe People and Beyond Boundaries by these authors and loved them.
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on October 29, 2012
I personally have been incredibly blessed and helped by all of the Cloud and Townsend resources I've read. This book, authored by Dr. John Townsend, is truly a timely, heartfelt and useful resource in a time when we're more tempted to hide than to really look at all the forces interacting with our souls. I highly recommend this to anyone who suffers from consistent disappointment in your relationships. In fact, I recommend all of the Cloud and Townsend resources to all people willing to do some self-evaluation to ensure a better future. God's blessing to you all.
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