- File Size: 501 KB
- Print Length: 193 pages
- Publication Date: April 26, 2013
- Sold by: Amazon Digital Services LLC
- Language: English
- ASIN: B00CJV1DVS
- Text-to-Speech: Enabled
- Word Wise: Enabled
- Lending: Enabled
- Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #76,507 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
The Hitwoman and the Family Jewels (Confessions of a Slightly Neurotic Hitwoman Book 4) Kindle Edition
Try Kindle Countdown Deals
Explore limited-time discounted eBooks. Learn more.
Enter your mobile number or email address below and we'll send you a link to download the free Kindle App. Then you can start reading Kindle books on your smartphone, tablet, or computer - no Kindle device required.
To get the free app, enter your mobile phone number.
What other items do customers buy after viewing this item?
Would you like to tell us about a lower price?
Top customer reviews
There was a problem filtering reviews right now. Please try again later.
In this installment, we begin with Maggie being pressured by the Delvecchio brothers to accept a contract on police officer Paul Kowalski, a former dating partner from the first book. It turns out that Patrick, our heroine's mentor in the assassination trade, isn't the only cop who moonlights in killing for hire --but while Maggie and Patrick do have ethical "standards," Kowalski's got none at all. (The Delvecchio's interest in his death, though, isn't based on his lack of morality; it's a self-protective move, since they're believed to be his current targets.) But while Maggie's pondering this "request," it becomes clear that there's a mystery afoot involving her estranged father, who when the series began was already in prison. Archie Lee's a small time thief and con man who was convicted of the killing of a teller during a bank robbery (though he's steadfastly denied being the shooter). Now, it's beginning to seem that there may have been more to this robbery than initially met the eye. And Paul Kowalski is definitely involved.
While I gave the earlier story five stars, I couldn't in good conscience be that generous for this novel. The mystery elements aren't crafted very well. I'm having to phrase things cautiously to avoid spoilers, but Maggie arrives at her insights about the clues to something by a process that's too much of a stretch to suspend disbelief. (And one clue was supposedly supplied by her dad --but he actually didn't say it here, though perhaps he did in an earlier book. I still haven't read the first two books; reading this one out of order was something of a fluke.) Also, one closeted bad guy acts on (and Maggie expects him to act on) knowledge that he couldn't logically possess at that time. Maggie benefits, BIG TIME, from a totally fortuitous coincidence in the denouement. I've said before that I don't take her supposed ability to talk to animals seriously; I interpret those "conversations" as hallucinations that serve her as a harmless coping mechanism. That said, while mammals can form emotional bonds with people that make them protective, reptiles do not; and while animals can seemingly have a "sixth sense" for danger and much more perceptive physical senses than we do, that allow them to follow and track people over considerable distances, IMO Maggie's four-legged friends pull off one feat that strains credibility a bit too much. Finally, though the issue in this book is fully resolved, it ends with a cliffhanger that obviously segues into the next book. :-( (And the next book, like all those after the first two, exists only in an e-version; I don't buy e-books, and got this one only because I had an Amazon credit earmarked for them. J. B., PUBLISH THESE IN PAPER FORMAT!)
Nonetheless, I still liked the book as harmless fun. It's fast paced, sparing with bad language (and has no sex as such --though Maggie and Patrick's loving relationship is moving in that direction) and often humorous. And it's also got its serious side, with a clear-cut good vs. evil conflict (and as Maggie says, "I'd like to see the good guys win this one!") and a look at the complex dynamics of a dysfunctional, but not unloving, family. (In this installment, we see some growth in more than one of Maggie's relationships, and some revisions in her estimations of people, which I give her credit for being able to make.) It remains something of a guilty pleasure; after all, respectable librarians who work for a Southern Baptist college aren't supposed to like, and root for, a semi-professional assassin (even if she only works at that trade occasionally, and has mitigating circumstances). But I don't feel too guilty, since Maggie's about the nicest, and kindest hearted, hired killer you're ever likely to meet. As Patrick wryly puts it, in that line of work Rule #1 is "Don't get caught;" but if she ever were to be caught, I wouldn't mind testifying as a character witness for the defense. :-) (And I'm sure a legion of her fans feel the same way!)
For those of you who haven't read the other books, stop, read those first, & then come back to this one. Believe me, you'll thank me. The series starts out with the unbelievable hell that is Maggie Lee's life. Her father is in prison for robbing a bank & killing a teller, her mother is in the "nuthouse", her youngest sister was kidnapped & murdered as a child, her other sister ran away from home, & if all this isn't bad enough a DUI driver kills her oldest sister, the husband, & puts Maggie's 3 year old niece in a coma. And don't even get me started on her wacky 3 aunts! Then to make it worse, the hospital where her niece is receiving treatment wants to kick her out. What's Maggie to do you ask? Well, take on the job of being a hitwoman for a mob boss to earn enough money to help keep her niece continue getting the needed medical care. But Maggie has a code. She will only take jobs where the "hit" is definitely the scum of the earth. Helping her is her murder mentor, Patrick, a decorated cop with 2 wives & 2 kids, who needs the money to support his 2 families. Patrick has the same code as Maggie. In each book the sexual/romantic tension between the two grows to where you think it is just going to ignite.
Also helping Maggie out are her niece's anole lizard, Godzilla aka God, her dingbat Dobberman, Doomsday aka DeeDee, & later a one-eyed cat known as Piss. What gives comic relief to all the suspense is that after the car accident that killed her sister & put her niece in a coma, Maggie finds because of a bizarre head injury from the crash she is able to communicate with animals. "God" according to Maggie sounds like Alan Rickman from the Harry Potter movies! As Maggie bungles her way through each "hit" she grows stronger & more compassionate to the world around her. This book leads up to a tension filled suspenseful ending that just will leave you with your mouth on the floor & cursing JB Lynn to get the next book The Hitwoman & the Neurotic Witness published ASAP!! How can you pass up a book that starts out with "You know it's going to be a bad day when you've got Piss on your chest, Doomsday staring at you in the eye, & God singing, 'Staying Alive' out of tune!!"
This series has it all, murder, romance, suspense, comic relief, & talking animals with attitude. Could you want anything more????