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Holy Crap! the World Is Ending!: How a Trip to the Bookstore Led to Sex with an Alien and the Destruction of Earth (Anunnaki Chronicles) Paperback – September 21, 2017
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"An unexpected story that promises to be one of the most creative fictional discoveries of the year...a fun approach to the entire save-the-Earth-from-alien-invasion scenario which successfully turns traditional approaches upside down."- D. Donovan, Senior Reviewer, Midwest Book Review
"An awesome read! Warm, witty--and thought provoking--a beach read that stays with you throughout the year!"- Aionios Books
"A rollicking seat of your pants fun ride through the universe!"- Joan Silvestro, Booktrader of Hamilton
"This book starts with a lot of humour, but quickly gets a very rich storyline with great characters and seriously... this ending? If you like to be blown away, you should read this!" - Esther, BiteIntoBooks
"Anna-Marie Abell has succeeded in weaving her years of study into in the ancient Sumerian culture and their gods with common conspiracy theories, pop culture and random human quirkiness into an out of this world end times romp that will have you laughing out loud at the most inappropriate times and possibly even shedding a tear or two before it's all said and done." - Jennifer, JennlyReads
About the Author
Anna-Marie Abell grew up in a trailer park. Well, several actually. Her trailer was on wheels so she got to experience the Pacific Northwest's vast array of mobile home parks as her parents moved her from one to the other. Somewhere along the way, she got totally into UFOs. Probably because she was hoping extraterrestrials would come and abduct her. But they never did. Luckily for her she was smart, because her only hope of escaping trailer life was college and a full scholarship. Moving to sunny California on her almost full ride to Chapman University, she was well on her way to her new life. Two bachelor degrees later (Film and Television Production and Media Performance), and several honors and awards for her accomplishments, she managed to start working in an almost completely unrelated industry from her majors: infomercials.
It was in college that she got bit by the "ancient alien" bug after listening to Zecharia Sitchin on Coast to Coast AM. In her pursuit to uncover the truth, she has spent the last twenty years researching the ancient Sumerian culture--in particular their "gods" called the Anunnaki--and their connection to the creation of the human race. What she found changed her life, her beliefs, and her understanding of the universe and everything beyond. Her humorous science fiction trilogy, The Anunnaki Chronicles, is a culmination of all her research, her borderline obsession for all things paranormal, and approximately 2,300 bottles of wine.
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Autumn is your typical semi socially awkward twenty something living in Southern California. Working for an advertising agency her favorite free time activity is her regular pig out sessions with her bestie artist Emma. On one such pig out eve, Autumn makes a quick stop at the local Barnes & Noble to look for a book on Light Beings when she encounters the most incredible specimen of manhood she could ever dream. Dubbing him “New Age Guy” due to his placement in the exact section she was headed for, Autumn becomes obsessed with this guy and after telling Emma about him is determined to find out more about this mysterious man.
Aptly named, Rigel has come to Earth from the planet Nibiru as an observer to the inevitable collision of one of his planet’s moons into Earth. Rigel also finds himself inexplicably drawn to this quirky Earth woman and seeks out more interaction with her against the wishes of his own kind and at the peril of death. Tossed into a forbidden whirlwind romance with an alien, Autumn is warped into the middle of her own space odyssey as she finds herself among alien spaceships, conspiracy theories and eons old prophecies that may result in her own demise. The race is on to save the human race with Autumn the most unlikely of saviors. Is there at least time for one more Twinkie?
Holy Crap! The World is Ending is the first book in the Anunnaki Chronicles by Anna-Marie Abell and takes the “end of the world” story line on a whole new journey. What if humans were created by alien life forms to do their bidding? What if alien life forms have been working with the Earth’s governmental superpowers all along and their existence has been kept a big secret from the rest of the Earth? Just how strong is number 12 hairspray and why are there so many darned Wal Marts all over the place? Holy Crap attempts to answer these and many more burning questions in this hilariously brilliant read.
Anna-Marie Abell has succeeded in weaving her years of study into in the ancient Sumerian culture and their gods with common conspiracy theories, pop culture and random human quirkiness into an out of this world end times romp that will have you laughing out loud at the most inappropriate times and possibly even shedding a tear or two before it’s all said and done. I couldn’t help but notice the politics of the politics of the Anunnaki to be eerily like that of Earth. At one point, there is a protest on Nibiru that could easily have been Anycity, U.S.A. Little things like this for me made this less of a super heavy Sci Fi book and more of a “Hey, look at that, what if they are like us!” sort of book. Another thing that really stood out for me was the addition of real people, places and podcasts to the narrative. This clever addition works twofold and functions a primer of resource material for those who find the Anunnaki intriguing. I, for one, have taken a deeper look at a few of her sources since reading this book. With this being the first in the Anunnaki Chronicles, Abell has set the bar high and it will be interesting to see where the Chronicles go from here. If this first book is any indication, it will be well worth the read.
There are back to back genuinely funny bits, liberally peppered with cultural and nerdy references, then * ka-bam* crap gets real. There are a fair few scenes which come on suddenly without preamble and which will offend some readers (concerning rape/murder/etc).
The writing is masterful and rapid fire. It reminded me a lot of Douglas Adams, or Grant/Naylor at the top of their games. Another reviewer was reminded of Shawn of the Dead. That's a fairly apt comparison.
The chapter headings and illustrations are perfectly hilarious and really add to the story.
This was a five star book for me right up until the last chapter. It ended so abruptly, I got reader's whiplash. Yes, I understand that it's the first in a series and the unresolved plot lines will be revisited later, but criminy, it just left me thinking "wait, what"?!
Interestingly enough, there's an afterword with enough conspiracy theory & alien/UFO info to keep the reader bemused for ages. I did not take the afterword info into consideration when tallying up stars and writing this review. A lot of readers will see the inclusion as an important part of the book and a positive thing.
For readers who are offended by fairly explicit sex or rough language, this book has both.
Altogether, a well written very funny book.
Disclosure: I received an ARC at no cost from the author/publisher.
Anna-Marie Abell has recreated Armageddon! This is a tantalizingly hilarious—and saucy—apocalyptic romance. We have good versus evil before the end of the freaking world!
We are first introduced to Autumn. She is quirky, witty and absolutely clumsy. After listening to a late night conspiracy radio broadcast, she visits Barnes & Noble to look for books on light beings.
She doesn’t necessarily find what she’s looking for, but she does see some mighty fine piece of delectable male HOTNESS. Her wandering eyes can’t help but fixate on any and everything emanating masculinity. The dreamy Barnes & Noble assistant, the hunk of an alien (that she doesn’t know is an alien yet) standing across the way…girl is going crazy!
Speaking of crazy, she suddenly starts hearing voices in her head and has an out of body experience. Meaning: she physically leaves her body. She’s this hovering thing floating above herself like those terrible dreams where you’re watching yourself make terrible decisions.
Autumn’s terrible decision is falling in love with the crazy hot alien. Well, that, and running him over with her car—the latter was an accident. I call it fate.
What Autumn soon finds out is that this hunk-o’-B&N signifies the destruction of Earth. No man should have that much power. Oh, but he does.
"I was startled awake by my real screams reverberating off the walls of my bedroom...I sagged back against the pillows and calmed by racing heart. I couldn't shake the dream. Rigel falling into the pit of lava kept playing over and over on a continuous loop...I hadn't really, I mean really, thought about what could happen if I continued these secret meetings with [him]."
Secret meetings, huh?...
Rigel, Autumn’s extraterrestrial man-love, is quite the specimen, my friends. He is from a planet unseen in the solar system. Snort. A planet of sexiness. These two are combustible and Anna-Marie Abell is not shy with that lighter!
Does the world end? Well, yes. It’s in the book’s title. What happens to Autumn as human kind inevitably disintegrates?
Autumn is handed the responsibility of saving her race. Meanwhile, Rigel is looming in the dark like a sexy reaper of death and destruction and honestly, I wouldn’t mind sacrificing myself to him.
"One last super sexy half-smile appears on his face, and my pain is replaced by the warmth of pure love."
The other characters in this book act as catalysts propelling our protagonists on this wild, conflicting journey. I could have survived without them; they’re not necessary, but perhaps they have a better place in the subsequent books of this series.
The humor is ON POINT. Err merr guurd. However, after the first fifty pages, I would have liked to see the characters take superiority over the humor. The plot did not swell and constrict like I was expecting it to because the satire overpowered the storyline. But hey, the world is ending. No one wants to read a book filled with mopey tears. Ok maybe we do, but not here!
Anna-Marie Abell has created an extremely impressive paranormal romance. Err-Apocalyptic romance? Heck, I don’t know what to even categorize this book as!
HOLY CRAP! THE WORLD IS ENDING! is in a class of its own.
*FTC Disclaimer: I received a copy of HOLY CRAP! THE WORLD IS ENDING! from Anna-Marie Abell in exchange for an honest review. I have in no way been influenced by the author and/or publisher's generosity. You can't fake these stars, baby!
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