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About Hope Edelman
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Blog postMarcia Evelyn Rosenberg Edelman Sept. 19, 1938-July 12, 1981 Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about the elasticity of time, especially this past year and a half, when time seemed to pass both slowly and quickly at once. We’ve been conditioned to conceive of time as linear, like a relentless arrow moving us in one direction from birth to death. We call the loss of young people “out-of-time” deaths, because they don’t occur where we believe they should along that trajectory. But the more I
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Blog postMy father, Julian Edelman (not the Patriots’ wide receiver)
Dear Friends, Dear Readers, Dear Sisters of the Heart,
On the Motherless Daughters Community Calls, and at our workshops and retreats, we spend so much time talking about our mothers that we often overlook the profound impact our father’s have had on us, too.
That’s something that I want to acknowledge and highlight, because it’s hitting me hard this year
Study after st -
Blog postMy mother, Marcia Edelman, 1938-1981
Dear Friends, Dear Readers, Dear Sisters of the Heart,
It’s been quite a year, hasn’t it, women? As I sat down in Los Angeles to write this annual letter to motherless daughters on Mothers Day, it’s been impossible to do that without situating it in the larger context of losses we’ve all experienced since Mother’s Day last year. People, jobs, incomes, social interactions, freedom of travel…already, May 2020 feels like half a -
Blog postHello Friends,
I’d like to share some information with you about delayed or postponed grief, because it’ll be helpful to know about in the coming weeks.
First, as many of us know, grief occurs in cycles. We can mourn to the best of our ability at any point in time, but months later — or years or even decades after the loss — those feelings can be reactivated. It can happen because of a date on the calendar, an anniversary event, a life milestone, or even the scent of a pa -
Blog postHello, Friends!
From start to finish, my next book took four years (gulp) to research and write. But it’s finished! and it’s scheduled for publication in early October 2020.
The book is called The Aftergrief: Finding Your Way Along the Long Arc of Loss. I like to think of it as Motherless Daughters all grown up. I was 28 when I wrote that book, just learning what an early loss would mean for the rest of my life. This book is more of the long-view perspectiv -
Blog postThe first holiday season without my mom was a confusing, disorienting time. I remember wondering, How are we going to continue traditions that had been under her purview? How will I even know how to do that without her guidance? I often think of a scene from Susan Minot’s novel Monkeys, about a group of siblings who’ve recently lost their mother in a car accident. As they decorate their house for the holidays they try to arrange everything as their mother always did. “Everything was
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Blog postDear Friends, Thanksgiving will soon be upon us, as tends to happen every November. I don’t know about you, but this is always a mixed time of year for me. It’s a culturally sanctioned period of connection and good cheer, but how many people always experience it that way?
Not everyone, that’s for sure.
38 percent of people surveyed by the American Psychological Association reported feeling higher levels of stress than usual around holiday time.
Most people I know find -
Blog postI was so moved by Anderson Cooper and Stephen Colbert’s interview on August 15, and their candid talk about childhood grief, I wrote an op-ed piece about it. The link to read it on the NYT web site is here. I’ve also cut and pasted it below. Please feel free to share with others! Opinion I Couldn’t Say ‘My Mother’ Without Crying Losing a family member at a young age has lasting impacts, well into adulthood. There’s no quick fix for childhood grief.
By Hope Edelman
Ms. Ed -
Blog postMay 11, 2019
Dear Motherless Daughter,
Here we find ourselves again, on the brink of another second Sunday in May. It’s easier in some years than in others, isn’t it? For many years after my mother died, this Sunday was all about missing her on a day that seemed culturally sanctioned to remind girls like me of what we no longer had. Later, it became a day to spend with my daughters and celebrate our bond. Now it’s also the day that caps off a mo -
Blog postMother’s Day can be a bittersweet holiday for those of us who’ve lost our moms. It’s an occasion to remember the bond we shared, but can also be a painful annual reminder of what’s been lost.
Between us and together, Claire Bidwell Smith and I have helped thousands of women explore the long-term effects of mother loss and face recurring events. Our free, one-hour video call on May 6th is open to anyone who’s facing Mother’s Day without a mother and would like support and community as
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