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How to Meet Broads: A Comprehensive Guide to the Art of Seduction Paperback – May 29, 2011
"Theft by Finding: Diaries (1977-2002)" by David Sedaris
In one of the most anticipated books of 2017, David Sedaris tells a story that is, literally, a lifetime in the making. Pre-order today
About the Author
For over a decade, Jeff Cagney has been widely regarded as the most knowledgeable, charming and sexually-dynamic relationship advisor in the Southeastern United States.
As the inventor of the acclaimed How to Meet Broads system, he has made it his goal to teach both men and women how to better navigate the often-treacherous world of dating.
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Top Customer Reviews
I was disgusted by a large portion of this book, primarily in the first half because of sentences such as:
Chapter 1, paragraph three, page 10, "Rather, meeting women and, more importantly, talking them into an exchange of bodily fluids..."
Chapter 1, paragraph three, page 11, "I learned what turned women on and figured out how to become exactly what any woman was looking for at any given moment."
This to me was a very sad start to a book even one with such an inspiring title as, "How to Meet Broads". You're immediately treating women as if they're meant simply for fornication and that it's alright to make yourself out to be something you aren't. That "something" is tailored to what they may be looking for so you can shack up for the night. Combining this attitude with the over-the-top Casanova routine of the opening I was ready to put this read down right away and spend my time elsewhere. I don't particularly find that fair and wanting to give this book a fair shake I delved further:
Chapter 2, paragraph two, page 13, "You might be better off reading one of those I'm Worth Something self-help books. You can find them in your local Barnes & Noble, just behind the slouching, overweight woman in the ill-fitting jeans."
Chapter 2, paragraph two through three, page 19, "When you bring a girl home with you, the goal is to get her more drunk, not less, and if the girls you meet are at all like the ones I've known, they'll be perfectly happy with any beer you hand them... you have even more options to offer her so that she can get drunk enough to make the idea of sleeping with you seem like a good one."
So essentially we're further denigrating women and fully endorsing getting them schnockered so that while inebriated they're going to lower their standards (presumably) and sleep with you. In other words the book is advocating that you remove informed consent before moving to the bedroom.
Chapter 2, paragraph seven, page 28, "If you're not already aware of this, every single thing a guy does is done with one goal in mind: Getting laid." This particular utterance occurs frequently throughout the book. Obviously it's patently untrue and I found it especially sad, even as an attempt at humor (which it is never presented as) because it's degrading to men.
Chapter 3, paragraph two, page 43, "Combine this with the advent of psychiatry and the feminist movement and the omnipresence of Oprah, and somewhere along the line, men got the impression that it was no longer appropriate to be strong and independent. Instead, it has become acceptable - and often encouraged - for men to talk - and when necessary, cry - about their feelings. For the most part, men are all becoming giant pussies." Those darn pesky women are at it again, ruining as many men as possible. Gosh!
Included in the first half of the book are references to bestiality because of a man's choice of pet (page 18-19) and how getting a pet just to meet women is a great idea because responsible pet ownership surely starts that way for all men - it's all about having sex, am I right? Then you have such solid nuggets of wisdom such as getting a bigger television (page 16) in order to hopefully impart some false sense of class and money (we women are surely all about your pocketbook) and that being too clean makes you gay (page 19). We're also advised that talking to women at dinner is just the pits (page 63), and that all women hate each other by nature and are just dying to cut each other down at a moment's notice (page 71).
By Chapter 5 we have moved away from this for the most part minus a sparse peppering of such jewels as:
"Despite recent scientific studies which have proven that men's brains are indeed thirty percent larger than the average female's, women still like to think that they're much smarter than their male counterparts, and feel that they are impeccably equipped to offer advice on virtually any subject. You can use this to your advantage...Something like `I'm baking chocolate chip cookies and I think I threw away the recipe. You're a girl, right? How much flour am I supposed to use?'Or `Some friends and I were arguing about this earlier: What was the name of Tiffani-Amber Thiessen's character on 90210?'" on page 110.
The use of a pejorative word that begins with the letter "C" and is used to denote an undesirable woman is also dropped by about this point in the book.
I really wondered why I was still reading How to Meet Broads but, it's not all bad. The author, Mr. Cagney, reprints his columns for the bulk of the 204 pages of the book and his advice in those aspects while not revolutionary is at stark odds with his narrations. Almost all of the above quotes come from his chapter headings and for the most part don't reflect the actual conversations he has through his column. Furthermore he does impart some good advice that you'd expect to see given by an older friend / relative to one that is their junior. He reiterates that you should be confident in who you are, what you are, and how you are, if you're not you need to identify why and take steps to change that because if you don't respect and love yourself you aren't going to get on with others. He does laud women and appropriately lambast those that use them when he is giving advice, but it's so painfully set against the rest of his book that it feels hollow.
In addition he does call to the carpet both women and men who are being ridiculously unfair to their partners in the relationship, and reminds his readers (and those who write to him) to be honest and upfront. Mr. Cagney also frequently brings to the table an important thing that we forget a great deal when we're younger: we're young. You don't need to let yourself become dragged down and in the dumps because you had one bad relationship or you were rejected one time too many - it's going to happen and we can either deal with that and grow as a person or stagnate.
The ultimate problem that I had with this book was tone and it came across to me that the author was trying far too hard to be funny. He had a pretty good and level communication in his column, just enough snarky humor and solid advice (though at times very repetitive which has more to do with the questions asked than answers given) to reach the reader. Then he moves into very alienating territory by deriding women, any man that doesn't fit the image he paints of a perfect man (that all women surely salivate over), and with his language he removes a chance for us to reach a middle ground. This hypocrisy was most apparent when he defines the word "broad" positively and then uses it derogatorily in his advice on page 77.
I would not suggest this book to any younger men who are struggling with self confidence and approaching women because of the dual tone. I would recommend his column to them however, because what you see written to individuals varies so greatly from his personal screeds in the first half of the book. I teetered heavily between a 2 star and a 3 star rating before making a decision. I found many parts of this book incredibly and horrendously offensive; I tried however, to look at the overall effect of How to Meet Broads and at what was being attempted by the author. I believe there was an honest effort to help those struggling look at the patterns they have fallen into whether in their own life or relationships, to address some of this, and help people grow into better individuals. This is exemplified in the latter half of the book. I went with a three star because of those factors, even though it isn't original, new, or perfect, this book could help someone.
My only fear is that it may also hurt those who are already rejected, dejected, and looking for someone that appears at surface level to agree with whatever poor thoughts they hold of an entire gender. We should never validate those types of belief with any form of credibility because they are intrinsically damaging and dangerous.
However, Jeff Cagney has one vital advantage because not only is he willing to share his experiences with the reader but he is equipped as a talented writer to give voice to them. How To Meet Broads can be used as a self-help guide, sure, but it is also a stand-alone, damn good read.
At some stage in his investigations into how the human mating dance occurs in modern life, Cagney started his own web site devoted to the subject and runs a sort of 'agony uncle' service which provides advice to the love-lorn and many of these anonymous episodes are recorded in his book and provide fascinating evidence of the countless problems you can encounter when meeting the opposite sex. However, his secret lies in the way he replies to these problems.
The rest of the book is divided into helpful sections, each devoted to a separate stage of the courtship ritual. He tells you how to create the proper environment for your seduction routines; how to be a man, or at least the type of man most women are attracted to; how to develop charisma and the art of conversation (which is as much about how to listen as much as what to say). Cagney then spells out the game you are playing, (even if you don't know it, you are taking part in a Cosmic Dance which has existed ever since Man first set foot on planet Earth). Of course, along the way you will experience rejection but Cagney instructs you not only how to deal with it but how to embrace it. Finally, he shows you how to become a master and attain the unattainable.
In all, this book is a masterpiece of how to get on with the opposite sex. Although it is written from a man's point of view, it is readily accessible by women. It is written in a very direct style. Cagney doesn't pull any punches. He calls a spade, a spade, but in a humorous way. In all, it should be required reading for any young men who aren't getting enough (or any). If that describes you, then do yourself a favor and learn from a master.
Ian Wallace Campbell That Will Do Nicely