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How Much Is Enough?: Everything You Need to Know to Steer Clear of Overindulgence and Raise Likeable, Responsible and Respectful Ch Paperback – December 11, 2003
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From Publishers Weekly
Parents who over-coddle, over-schedule and over-stimulate would do well to cut back or risk damage for generations to come, according to authors Clarke, Dawson (co-authors of Growing Up Again) and Bredehoft (chair of the department of social and behavioral sciences at Concordia College). Unchecked, overindulgence can create kids who lack even the most basic skills, morals and emotions, they say. Considering the popularity of the 'they're-only-kids-once' people who encourage individuality and permissiveness, this is certainly a different-maybe even controversial-approach. While perhaps a bit melodramatic in its outlook, the book manages to be useful and specific, and it's not simply a "tough love" guide, either. Go ahead, these authors say, love them dearly but while you are at it, give them chores, rules, structure and a united front-the results will be overwhelmingly positive. The unlikeliness of some scenarios and tips will make parents wince (despite what anyone says, few kids will thank their parents for being strict). It's also safe to assume that no matter the case, sometimes even the best parent can't get a point in edgewise. So, if parents and kids can learn when enough truly is enough, will the world be a better place? Maybe, maybe not-but like chicken soup, it can't hurt.
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"A well-researched, groundbreaking approach to understanding the impact of overindulgence on our children, on our communities, and on our planet." -- Rick Ingrasci M.D., M.P.H., Director of Community Development, BigMindMedia
"This book will help you give your child the skills to be successful in life." -- Joan K. Comeau, Ph.D., CFCS, CFLE, Founder and Director,
"This is a marvelously helpful book for those of us who want the very best for our children..." -- Reverend Dick Lundy
Top customer reviews
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I live in a very wealthy community and frequently see what happens when parents over-indulge their children. Many times these kids grow up and can't finish college; or even worse, they get involved with drugs. They are totally un-motivated and quite often unable to focus on a job
What I particularly like about How Much is Enough? is that it gives information not just on how to avoid financially indulging your children, but also on how to emotionally indulge your children. Often the problem is two-sided. It's not that the child has been given too many things; it's also that they have way too much freedom or no rules at all. The author has made it easy for the reader to focus in on the particular issues that they find challenging.
The examples are compelling and easy to understand. Aunts, uncles and grandparents can learn a lot from this book, too. The sooner you "get it" about what is happening in the lives of your children and grandchildren, the better off you are. The author also gives you insight into your own issues, where perhaps you were over- or under-indulged, and how you carry that over to your children.
Because I was so interested in the subject, I did not find this book difficult to read--nor did any of my clients. I would perhaps rename it something short, like: Real Help for Parents. I'd give it five stars!
Carol Ummel Lindquist, Ph.D.
I was impressed with this research driven book. It contains countless interviews and real-life situations. The stories tell great lessons.
I see this as a window into the family dynamics of many children today.
I experienced self evaluation and a greater understanding of people I encounter in my daily life.
Worth every penny...buy it. emk.
It provides wonderful ideas about the tendency to overindulge one's kids. It also
provides thoughtful insights about your own upbringing. When it comes to
birthdays and holidays, pull the book off the shelf and review it. Maybe it is
time to give to a non-profit instead of another gadget for the child.
Really no one wants to raise a total brat or monster, but it happens all the time! This is a must-read for all parents, especially those who want their kids to be upstanding citizens when they grow up.
Good book though.