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on May 5, 2015
My Dad gave me a copy of this when I graduated highschool in the 90s but I wasn't "ready" for it yet, I don't even think I read it to be honest. Now I'm 37 and realizing that I've put my personal growth on the back burner for entirely too long. I had pretty much given up on making new adult friends. I had actually self-diagnosed myself with Asperger's because I was having such a difficult time trying to figure out why people (including myself) do the things that do. The realization that my marriage was being effected by my nearly empty toolbox of social skills promoted me to take personal responsibility and shoulder the blame myself for once instead of blaming everyone around me for everything. I grew up with a hypercritical Mother so I think I had promised myself that I would never be criticized again, even if that meant writing people off the instant I felt like I had made myself vulnerable enough to be hurt by them.

I couldn't find the copy that my dad gave me so I ordered a new one and chapter 1 alone is changing the way I look at EVERYTHING. I've been plagued with mild depression/anxiety for 20 years and I'm realizing that I've developed some unhealthy defense mechanisms to cope with these issues. I never turned to drugs or alcohol, but the fortress-like walls I've constructed to deal with criticism (real or perceived) aren't much better for me. I've re-read and taken notes on the first section of the book several times now and my wife is noticing and she seems quite relieved, i had no idea I could impact another persons life so strongly.

Like I said, I am only getting started with the book and it has already helped me enough to warrant a 5-star rating. This book has stood the test of time for a reason and I can see why now. The strategies are applicable to and helpful in all aspects of my life so far, from my marriage to my job, and even to the way I interact with clerks in gas stations. I've read numerous self help books in the past, seen a therapist for 3 years, been through the gauntlet of antidepressants, etc, and until now I thought I was wasting my time. I've been learning things all along, but I never learned how to actually apply the things I had learned until now. This book speaks my language and if your background sounds even remotely similar I have a feeling that you'll agree.
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on November 12, 2016
In my honest opinion, several principles in this book are repeated around the book. I don't see it as a disadvantage, because repetition is the key to learning. I did think several of the principles explained in the book are common sense, but I found that it could be easy for a person to react quickly to conflicts. This book has taught me the importance of staying in control and how beneficial it is to be in control of our behaviors and act in a way of service to others. The examples described in the book made it simpler to understand the concepts that Dale is teaching. I recommend this book if you would like to improve your skills with people. This book is especially beneficial for those who are working on their businesses and close relationships.

This book is divided into four parts. The first half of the book discusses techniques in handling people and how to have people like you. The final half of the book gives instructions about how to win people to our own thinking and how to be a leader by changing people without offending them or causing resentment.

In the first part of the book, it is divided into three principles. The first principle emphasizes the importance of avoiding criticism and he describes working with people as: working with people of logic. He further describes complaining and criticizing as a foolish task to do and how it takes a person of character to understand, forgive, and have self-control. Principle # 2 describes the importance of honest and sincere appreciation. Within this principle he describes the importance of ending our own thinking of accomplishments and desires. Instead, we must put our focus on the other person's good qualities. If being sincere, this will cause people to cherish them in their minds, even years later. The third principle involves influencing the other person to want, but not in a way that is manipulative. With this principle, he describes the importance of self-expression and connects it to the importance of thinking in terms of the other person, so that they come up with your ideas on their own, which they will like more.

Within the second part of the book, it teaches six principles. The first describes how critical it is to become interested in other people because you will make more friends compared to having others interested in you. When he moves onto the second principle, he explains the importance to smile in a heartwarming way because it will brighten the lives of those who see it. Dale then describes the importance to recall a person's name in the third principle. He gives tips on how to remember and then explains how people enjoy the sound of their own name. The fourth principle is about being a good listener and encouraging those to talk about themselves. He then goes onto to explain again that people are more interested in talking about themselves instead of others. He further explains this point in principle five: Talk in terms of the other person's interests. The final step is to sincerely make the other person feel important because this is the "deepest urge in human nature."

Dale describes in the third part of the book the steps to have a person think in terms of your own thoughts. He then explains that it is better to avoid arguments and to show respect for other people's opinions and never tell them they are wrong. because it will further push them away. If there is fault in your own behavior, Dale explains to immediately admit you're wrong without any doubts. If you are upset, he explains to sit down and counsel together, and if there are differences, understand it. Even in some differences, there will be points of agreement. He then explains the importance of agreement and having the person say "yes," at least twice. You doing this by looking into the other person's viewpoint and asking questions that cause them to agree. It is essential to have friends do the talking and have them excel us, instead of excelling them. When this occurs, they will feel important. To further the notion of feeling important, it is important to have the individual create their own ideas. He deepens this idea by asking questions such as, "Why should he or she want to do it?" and then being sympathetic towards their ideas. In order to catch a person's attention, you must dramatise the ideas you have. If all else fails, he explains the importance of competition and how it drives people to feel important and empowered to work efficiently and effectively.

In the final part of the book, Dale again discusses the importance of beginning with praise and honest appreciation. When someone makes a mistake, call to their mistakes indirectly. This can be done my making their mistakes your own and explaining the importance of fixing it and why it gave you a disadvantage. He then explains the importance of asking questions that direct the person you’re speaking to, to obtain your idea on their own. He emphasizes the importance of having the person be saved from embarrassment, and then explains the importance of praise again, even if it is small. Dale then gives examples of giving a person a reputation that makes them better, in order to have the person be motivated to improve. After giving someone a reputation to live up to, encourage the person to correct their faults and make them happy to do the actions you suggest.
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on December 31, 2012
Let me first say I have a master's degree (working on my doctorate) and work in the in the complex legal market.

I also read and/or listen the original "How to Win Friends and Influence People" at least once every couple years and firmly believe in it. It is good, solid advice. I believe the concept of this book was a great idea. That is where my praise stops.

This version on the "Digital Age" however is AWEFUL. There are soooooo many metaphors, analogies, and overly forced advanced English word choices that this book is unreadable. You literally have to "digest" every paragraph on the meaning of the language alone. It made this a painful read. I wonder if the authors were sitting around trying to make themselves sound smart or see how complex they can make this book. If Dale Carnegie were around today, he would be scratching his head in disgust. After all the original concept of this book was for the reader to function in any scenario, not to insult his/her intelligence. The original book was written for the common person which is why the it was such a success.

Take my advice skip this version and read the original instead.
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on December 7, 2017
I have so many good things to say about this book. I have bought this book for several of my friends who are in sales or who just need help talking to people. If anything will make me successful in my life it will be what I have learned from my Masters degree and this book. It truly is the only book you will need to succeed. I could go on an on about this book but others have already done so. Just buy it! Its so worth the $10!
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on February 8, 2017
Wow - this book is an amazing read, and beneficial both personally and professionally. In just two weeks of reading, this has already aided my work and leadership qualities all around. Appropriate for any level of leadership!
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on June 6, 2014
This makes you look at what you're doing in life and wonder how you can do it even better. At least that's what I'm getting out of it. I can see how it is very helpful for business minded people. I also see how it can turn an average person into a multimillionaire. I feel this is a must read for every boss, salesperson, and/or anyone whose looking to become an even better person. This book is rather old, but Carnegie has amazing techniques that can be applied to this day. Its a true gem that does not age. I was sent by the Shaycarl! Wanna talk about inspirational, go watch some of his videos on youtube! I first heard about this book from his vlog on 3/10/09. He's an amazing man and a great father.
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on July 14, 2016
There's a reason this book is so famous--believe the hype! Yes, many things stated in the book are kind of no-brainers, but Carnegie offers many examples and insights that illuminate the importance of his claims. I've learned a lot and try and remember his 'lessons' on a daily basis. It's definitely more than like a 'self-help' type book, it will help with your daily life! I recommend it to everyone and reference it often.
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on April 27, 2017
I liked the simple and effective approach by the author with various examples to highlight the point he made in each chapter. It took me a while to finish reading it due to the many aspects of your relation to others that can be improved. It takes time and practice to employ the different recommendations, but it will definitely pay off and make you a better all around person and someone that everyone wants to get to know.
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on July 16, 2014
I've been reading this book for over 50 years. When you're suffering from some relationship this book has some answers. Or just for leasure reading it can gift you a lift in your daily life by opening up to any page, where I'm certain you'll find a similar situation with a solution to follow. This book should be kept right next to your Bible. They both have answers and they're both great references for courses in Human Nature which is not offered in any college in the land...... Jno Watts, League City Texas
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on January 6, 2015
Book Review by Nick Nazzaro
How to Win Friends and Influence People
By Dale Carnegie
Who could have imagined that a book written in 1936 could still be so relevant today! Dale Carnegie’s How to Win Friends and Influence People is a must read for anyone who wants to better understand human nature and learn the keys to success in dealing with people. This book is invaluable to everyone, because it makes as much sense in your business life as it does in your personal and family life.
One of the things that make this book so powerful is the fact that every piece of advice Carnegie offers is supported with real life examples. These help the reader digest and more deeply understand his key points. Carnegie offers solid advice in several areas. First, he provides fundamental techniques in handling people. These techniques include giving honest, sincere appreciation to others, and not criticizing or complaining about them. Second, he talks about ways to make people like you. Things as simple as smiling and making the other person feel important can help accomplish this. Third, he gives strategies to help persuade people into your way of thinking. This is helped by being sympathetic to the other person’s ideas and desires and immediately admitting if you are wrong. And finally, he teaches you key principles of leadership. It is important to ask questions instead of giving orders, and generously use encouragement so a persons’ fault would seem easy to correct.
This is a self-improvement book but it doesn’t feel like it. The book keeps you engaged because it is compilation of interesting stories. You will learn how President Lincoln motivated his generals during the Civil War by effectively communicating with them. You will even learn how Mr. Carnegie himself avoided trouble with the law while walking his dog in the park. These stories support the points Carnegie is making, but they are extremely memorable. You will find yourself nodding your head and smiling as you absorb these stories.

How to Win Friends and Influence People is a very easy read. Carnegie writes in a way that leaves you wanting more. He uses simple language, and writes in a down to earth way. “You can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people interested in you.”  His advice just makes sense. “Talk to someone about themselves and they'll listen for hours.” Before you know it, chapter after chapter goes by and you’ve read more than you thought you would.
I consider this book a guide to life. It had a profound effect on me, and it is not something I will forget two weeks after reading it. Rather, I will take these strategies and techniques with me, and apply them to my people interactions for a lifetime. I’m confident this book will have a similar impact on you!
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