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If I Die Before I Wake: A Memoir of Drinking and Recovery Paperback – April 1, 2010
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About the Author
Top Customer Reviews
As I was reading this book, I was consistently reminded of another memoir I have recently read; "Potato chips for breakfast." "Potato chips" deals more with severe family dysfunction that leads to abuse and dependence; while "If I die before I wake" deals more with the positives of recovery. Barb R. deals more with the positive support through AA she has received since deciding to take the first steps to recovery more so than the author of "Potato chips," who just discusses her recovery from alcohol or other drugs in the last chapter of the book (and spends more time discussing the horrors of her home life that led to her using in the first place).
My only fault with the book is that Barb jumps around in time a great deal. At the beginning of the book, she has suffered a signifigant loss that led to a very real relapse. Then the book jumps back in time to her childhood and teenage years, in which she was pregnant and abandoned by her new husband just after they were married. Then the book jumps back to the signifigant loss, and eventually meeting of someone who helps her get into AA and recover.Read more ›
Rogers not only survived through the suicide of her mother, but took refuge in substance abuse to battle the emotional trauma she found herself in. This tale takes us through her spiral downward in addiction which included being homeless and the shattering truth of her son's tragic death.
And at the very end of her ability to topple further, she found a moment of grace and wound up at a twelve step meeting. Someone reached out to her and said "You won't ever have to be alone again." And recovery began.
I highly recommend this book. She accurately describes the horrors and effectively expresses the soul crunching losses she had experienced. And she still shares the hope. She still offers a step by step progression out of the darkest places one can go.
Brought up in an alcoholic home, Barb weaves a tale of searching for love and meaning in her life. She marries six times, has three babies all of whom pass, and she blames herself for these horrors on the inside. This emotion precipitates a further dive into the depths of booze, pills, more lovers, more tragedies and a heightened desire to escape life. At a meeting one day, not believing in a Higher Power, an old timer tells her to "get down on your knees". She does not see the white light, or arrive at some giant spiritual awakening, but rather, finally feels a slow but steady change in herself; that alcohol and drugs are not the answer.
She discovers that the "beyond your wildest dreams" of which AA speaks can indeed become a reality when she marries the love of her life and is able to cope with health and other issues without picking up a drink. It is truly a raw and griping book. And I would say to any of you who have questions about AA, or are on the fence, come join us! But first read this book - your doubts will be assuaged. Highly recommended!
Most Recent Customer Reviews
This is a book that honestly and accurately reflects the process by which a person ravaged by addiction compounded by loss recovers. Read morePublished 8 months ago by Amazon Customer
A remarkable story of courage. Insightful and inspirational. Thank you Barb for sharing your story.Published 23 months ago by Julie Smiley
The author's struggle to recover from years of alcoholism is a painful but inspiring story. Because I have a loved one who is currently in a life-and-death struggle with alcohol,... Read morePublished on April 12, 2014 by Janj
The book was well written and in such a way that you could feel the ups and downs of her life right along with her.Published on March 31, 2014 by Karen Vice
This book accurately depicts the struggles inherent in addictions. It lists the beginnings of trouble all the way to successful abstinence. Must read!Published on March 16, 2014 by J
4 1/2 stars. Great and thought provoking read. I could not put it down and must commend the author's courage for sharing her story in a brutally honest light. Read morePublished on June 23, 2013 by Jamie