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It's All Under Control: A Journey of Letting Go, Hanging On, and Finding a Peace You Almost Forgot Was Possible Paperback – September 18, 2018
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It’s time to get our control under control.
Jennifer Dukes Lee never thought she struggled with control. As long as everything went exactly the way she wanted it to, she was totally flexible.
But then Jennifer discovered what happens when you try to wrap your arms around everything, thinking it’s all on you: You get burned out on hustle. You toss and turn more at night, and you laugh less during the day. You’re so busy―caring, serving, working, and trying so hard―that you can’t even hear God’s voice anymore.
It’s All Under Control is a book for every woman who is hanging on tight and trying to get each day right―yet finding that life often feels out of control and chaotic. Join Jennifer on the journey of learning how to:
- Overcome the anxieties and worries that burden your heart
- Prioritize your busy life so you can make choices that align with God’s best for you
- Find freedom through a new “Do, Delegate, or Dismiss” approach to your daily tasks
- Let go of what God has not asked you to do, so you can shine at what he has
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- Publisher : Tyndale Momentum (September 18, 2018)
- Language : English
- Paperback : 288 pages
- ISBN-10 : 1496430476
- ISBN-13 : 978-1496430472
- Item Weight : 9.6 ounces
- Dimensions : 5.6 x 0.7 x 8.3 inches
- Best Sellers Rank: #10,879 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- Customer Reviews:
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Reviewed in the United States on September 19, 2018
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A few quotes – and really, it’s so hard to pick just a few. My book is glowing with yellow highlights.
“…you are not a grape; you do not mature just by existing.”
“I live under the false assumption that if I handle everything, I can shield my beloved people from pain.”
“But even for those of us with good intentions, our caring can cross over into behavior that makes us miserable, anxious, tired—and probably less pleasant to be around. We even find ourselves annoying.”
“I have regretted all the times that my well-meaning “acts of kindness” have made me as pleasant as a rabid porcupine.”
“Martha—Okay. You knew she’d be on the list. But can we just stand in solidarity with Martha for a moment? We would have been right in that kitchen with her. How else are people supposed to eat?”
“Good intentions get the best of us, don’t they? Eve probably didn’t go into her day with a diabolic item on her to-do list. Prune roses. Check. Feed the goofy-looking animals with really long necks. Check. Take stroll with God around lake. Check. Try out new fruit. Check. Usher sin into world. Check.”
“There’s a fine line between unhealthy control and healthy control, and that line is drawn with the pen of good intentions.”
“Consider the mental shift that happens when we focus primarily on Jesus’ love for us instead of our love for Jesus. Rather than working to prove our love, we work because Jesus has already proven his love toward us.”
“If our relationship to Jesus is our defining one, then every decision—big or little—passes through that filter. So instead of saying yes to prove our love and devotion to people or to Jesus, we are allowed to experience the freedom of saying no, based on the fact that we have nothing to prove. We already are beloved.”
“It’s hard to know when to hold tight to what we love and when to let it go. So I pray, “Give us the wisdom today, dear Jesus, to know the difference.”
“We must not confuse our God-given abilities with our God-given assignments.”
“Sometimes “Let go and let God” is bad advice.”
The stories draw word-pictures you can relate to your own life and that you won’t soon forget. I can see Jennifer Dukes Lee in my minds-eye lying flat out in the snow, one boot off, headed for that hay bale with the best intentions to create the best Christmas ever. And that scene, indelibly etched on my mind’s eye, is just one of the many visuals that will remind me of her shared wisdom and hopefully internalize and use everything that I have learned.
Jennifer Dukes Lee has a way with stories, wisdom, and compassion that will help you let go of trying to prove your love or whatever is spurring your need for control and to say “yes” only when it’s appropriate, letting go of wheel enough to let God and others do their part.
I fully intend to buy copies of this book to share with a few AAA-type-personality ladies (really, one “A” just doesn’t cut it for these gals – and myself) who happen to be my best friends. Birds of a feather and all that…
Highly recommended as a life-changing read.
I received this book as a digital Advanced Reader Copy (ARC) from the publisher through NetGalley. My opinions are my own.
Jennifer Dukes Lee shares how control had become a coping mechanism to numb herself from the pain of life. She discusses the unhealthy affects control has upon us and how it can break us down, piece by piece. There’s a cost to control. This quote by Jennifer summed it all up for me. “I can’t begin to tell you how I willingly withstand the pressure of believing I have to be “in control,” reliable, on top of all things—and how often that self-pressure completely breaks me. I’ve learned to hide the fractured debris of my overworked life.” This resonated with me on so many levels!
I couldn’t put the book down! I highlighted and journaled my way through the powerful truths and nuggets of wisdom. Jennifer Dukes Lee gently guides the reader through her Crack the Control Code plan and accepting the invitation from Jesus to live our lives in a new way. I say yes to Jesus because everything in my life is not fine, even though I tell everyone it is, including myself. It’s All Under Control is about getting our control, under control, surrender, and accepting God’s best for us.
I loved Jennifer’s description of surrender, “Surrender is willfully accepting and yielding to God’s plan for your life—no matter the cost.” It’s about being who God created us to be, living intentionally, and finding the peace we all long for.
I had so many “me too” and “aha” moments throughout the book. I experienced revelation, introspection, and hope of being able to untangle myself from unhealthy control. This quote by Jennifer Dukes Lee drove it all home for me, “I want depth but I stay stuck in the shallows—because I’m strung so thin. My desire to love well is why I say yes too often.” Yes, and Amen!
Jennifer walks alongside the reader as she shares her personal stories. I love the Bible verses, characters, and stories she shares throughout the book. “It’s All Under Control’ has useful tools to implement the Crack the Control Code plan; The Three Control Characters, The Decision Tree, and a Control Code Continuum. They are all highly effective and easy to follow.
“It’s All Under Control” is a must-read for so many beautiful reasons. I absolutely love Jennifer’s honest and engaging writing style. I’m confident this book will speak to the hearts and souls of other women as it did me.