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It's Called a Breakup Because It's Broken: The Smart Girl's Break-Up Buddy Paperback – Unknown format, September 5, 2006
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This month's Book With Buzz: "The Lying Game" by Ruth Ware
From the instant New York Times bestselling author of blockbuster thrillers "In a Dark, Dark Wood" and "The Woman in Cabin 10" comes Ruth Ware’s chilling new novel, "The Lying Game." See more
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From Publishers Weekly
If He's Just Not That into You told a woman how to spot a man who's not really interested in a relationship with her—and how to deal with it proactively—this follow-up is for those, male and female, who've been blindsided by a breakup after thinking Everything Is Fine. Speaking less this time from a guy's perspective and more as someone who has been dumped and survived, Behrendt tackles the often inevitable symptoms of a broken attachment: the obsessive thinking (and calling and e-mailing), the crying, the debilitating depression (and its effects on one's job performance), the crazy acting-out, the food and spending issues, the friend burnout. This time, Behrendt is aided by his wife, who offers her own breakup stories, with the two together serving as a constant reminder that one can love again. The book is padded with not-so-funny vignettes, and anecdotal letters from readers are answered in a rather wearying Dear Abby style. There's little new or insightful, but Behrendt's frankness—never too harsh—is as winning as ever, and the title is catchy. Everything is more or less in place for this burgeoning franchise.
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
Behrendt, coauthor of the wildly popular dating guide He's Just Not That into You (2004), teams up with his wife to offer a how-to guide for coping when a relationship goes south. Both Greg and his wife, Amiira, went through extremely traumatic, drawn-out breakups before finding happiness with each other, and they share the stories of what they did wrong (and what they eventually did right) as they go through the basics of how to survive a breakup: stop calling him or waiting for him to call, don't sit at home moping, avoid wearing sweats (unless exercising), and find a friend to help you through it. They also include letters seeking advice and Greg's responses to them, breakup horror stories, and "psycho confessionals," real tales of women who went too far in reacting to a breakup. The authors take a lighthearted and positive tone throughout their boisterous guide; expect demand from the many readers who made He's Just Not That into You a hit. Kristine Huntley
Copyright © American Library Association. All rights reserved --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
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Top customer reviews
I thought I was dating “the one”. Promises were made, he gave me a ring, we were in love (or so I thought!). Then, without warning, he needed a “break” (read “break-up”, I am sure he was just trying to make it sound better). What on earth had I done? There were no warning signs. He went from lovey-dovey to “I can’t talk to you anymore” within a few hours.
What now??? I felt like a piece of me had been torn off. I went through the motions of life, but I couldn’t sleep, I couldn’t eat, I couldn’t concentrate. Nothing seemed the same. And I was shocked that others could continue on with life – couldn’t they see how much life had changed (at least for me)? This guy & the break-up was all I could think about.
Then along comes this book. It was a gift from a friend. I crawled into bed and read it in just one sitting (although I wasn’t really sitting, I was curled into a ball). It was like salve on an open wound. I laughed, I cried, I read and re-read. This book was about me and for me. It was like a good friend who knew exactly what to say. It became my break-up bible.
Each chapter had helpful tips to move on. I realized right away that I was living in a “boyfriend torture chamber” and I had to remove all memories of him. I had to get rid of his old texts and stop re-reading them. I had to take his pictures off of my phone. I had to stop stalking his social media to find out if he moved on (accept the fact he is dating Heidi Klum and MOVE-ON! LOL!).
And although I did not see any warning signs, as the book said, he must have left the relationship much earlier. I thought about relationships I had ended. I realized I usually was “over them” a few weeks before I finally broke it off. And when I finally “did the deed”, I felt more relief than anything else. And after the relationship was over, I really did not want to talk to the guy again. That helped me look at this relationship in the same way.
Once I had some time under my belt (the first few weeks SUCKED), I was able to see the relationship for what it was. Not so great after all… like shoes I was convincing myself felt good, but after I got them off and the blisters healed, I realized how much hurt they caused. Like the book said, I was looking at the relationship through rose-colored glasses. Take the glasses off – oh my! The relationship really wasn’t that awesome.
I did take the book’s advice and instead of moping around the house, I spent extra time at the gym, I reorganized my closets, I found time and a place to meditate (it was better than “Netflix and chill” with the ex-guy), and looked into graduate school. At first, I was just going through the motions, but after a few weeks, a new “rockin’” me was emerging. Yay me!!
In addition to this book, I got “Ignore the Guy, Get the Guy, The Art of No Contact” (I highly recommend that book, too). Now, this ex-boyfriend has come sniffing around again. I am not sure I want him back. But, with these 2 books’ help, I feel in control of my emotions. I will not be an option. I will not be a booty call. I will not be a psycho ex-girlfriend. I want to be remembered as “the one that got away”.
I highly recommend this book. I plan to have a few copies on hand to give to girlfriends after a break-up. I am a Superfox and you are a Superfox too!!!
- Greg/Amiira's experiences: learning about their painful experiences made me feel less lonely, it put my experience in perspective, and let me know that it can be normal to temporarily become absolutely insane after a break up. It was also helpful in helping me see that there was life after my breakup
- Breakups happen, can happen suddenly and with no warning, or "sometimes he's just not that into you": I know they are just stating a fact of life but in my vulnerable state I found this terrifying. It really confused me in terms of having hope for the future because it highlighted the many bad things that happen in relationships and made me feel like it could happen again at any time.
- Get over it because you are wasting your time/and or you will get fired by wallowing in your misery too long: True but not really helpful because I already know that.
Needless to say, the day after finishing this book, I am in bed with a box of cupcakes and another book. Good luck to all of us recovering from a breakup - lots of empathy and love to you!