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It's Not Okay: Turning Heartbreak into Happily Never After Paperback – January 31, 2017
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About the Author
- Item Weight : 9.9 ounces
- Paperback : 320 pages
- ISBN-10 : 1501171399
- ISBN-13 : 978-1501171390
- Dimensions : 5.5 x 0.8 x 8.38 inches
- Publisher : Gallery Books; Reprint edition (January 31, 2017)
- Language: : English
- Best Sellers Rank: #76,894 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- Customer Reviews:
Top reviews from the United States
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Her re-telling of her relationship with #26 can be educational for women and men navigating "roller-coaster" romances and the potential psychic dangers they pose. However, her retrograde perspectives on relationships is so glaringly evident and disastrously reaffirmed throughout her book that I found myself reading some incredibly hypocritical passages aloud to my partner just for laughs. She calls herself a feminist but also continuously refers to other women as "skanks" "whores" and "sluts," calls wimpy behavior being a "pussy," and buys heavily into hierarchical relationship styles of hyper-femininity and hyper-masculinity so that when these exaggerated gendered characteristics play out in her relationship, it comes as absolutely no surprise to anyone but her. She conforms to every possible beauty standard and stereotype from clothes to shoes to makeup to thinness to Brazilian waxes to hair to shopping and on and on and on. She devotes page after page to these subjects couching "liberation" and "self-actualization" in terms of physical attractiveness and, most of all, being skinny. (She reveals that she is a size 4 early on and after gaining a few pounds during her breakup, frequently refers to herself as "fat")
I'll summarize her recovery process here: 1) drink booze, 2) drink more booze, 3) drink even more booze, 4) make lists, 5) burn stuff, 6) cry and cry and cry and cry, 7) get skinny, 8) buy lipstick, 9) have revenge sex with ex, and 10) exercise your incredible privilege by not working at all through this entire self-pity process and somehow afford to move to NYC to live in Greenwich Village to become the new Carrie Bradshaw. Now you're cured!
If you like Bachelor gossip, this has some stuff for you. If you happen to be a woman going through heartbreak, the entrenched anti-feminist attitudes of a woman who somehow claims the feminist mantle throughout the book might be $12 better spent on a book that really is empowering rather than a book that compares "brown liquid detoxes" to the emotional process of recovering from heartbreak and potential abuse.
This book is set up like a diary for the month or so after Andi and Josh broke up (right after Chris's premiere). Each chapter is basically an update on how she is moving forward (or not) and a flashback to her time as a reality star. It ends with her advice on how to survive a painful breakup, much of the advice is not good advice to boot.
By the middle of the book when she started fat shaming people I gave up on ever liking this book.
I'm surprised by a lot of things she didn't dig into with this book. Eric's death was a brief mention and he didn't even get much of a pass at all, it was all about how Josh's reaction made her fall in love with him more. Nick's cheeto confessional on the airplane wasn't mentioned at all and I was looking forward to hearing if this caused any issues behind the scenes. Nothing really was talked about that was behind the scenes while filming which is what most picking this up really want to read.
Beyond that, I just felt like I was reading a bitter Facebook timeline of an angry girl who just got dumped. We ALL have those friends that use Facebook as the perfect place to air dirty laundry and that's exactly how this read.
Save your time and pick up Courtney's book instead if you are looking for a more juicy tell-all.