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Showing 1-10 of 36 reviews(2 star). See all 389 reviews
on December 22, 2013
I bought 4 of these for my shipping container compound and am wholly disappointed in their performance. First off, how can a group of refugees escape the downfall of civilization over a road paved with skulls when the ground clearance is so small?. Second, you can't fit your 42" flat screen and 4 cases of MRE's on after you raided the Costco and/or national guard armory, its just too small inside. Sure it looks the part, but so does a rusted out Bronco II, but looks can't survive the inevitable frontal attack by a rival tribe/group. I do like the fact that when I roll up at the New World bazaar and barter post, I'll be the envy of every warlord and chieftain. I'll just wait for a real apocalypse commuter/diesel powered death machine to become available, and store these things out back with the other symbols of world so out of touch with what really matters(ed), and look upon them with nostalgic reference and a reminder that were are (were) screwed from the outset.
0Comment| 14 people found this helpful. Was this review helpful to you? Report abuse
on February 16, 2014
Welll... um. Ya know I really bought this thing because I'm a preper and thought if need be, I could stock it up with food rations and scram into the woods somewhere. I decided to give it a dry run. Ohhhhh myyyyy! First thing that happened, the whole friggin' contraption hit a rock and crapped out all of it's internal fluids leaving me stranded for days in the wilderness! Geez. After I ate all of my rations, I had to go hunt me some squirrels with sticks and stones. And no, the creepy little rodents don't taste anything like chicken (Dad, you lied to me). Some stupid redneck finally found me (after using The Donk for target practice). I got shot right in the @$$ and had to have one butt cheek totally amputated. Now, The Donk sits out there in the forest rusting away and the locals use it as an outhouse. I spend my days sitting lopsided on a memory foam pillow while waiting for my next disability check. Grrrrrrrrr!... I want my $ back.
0Comment| 13 people found this helpful. Was this review helpful to you? Report abuse
on February 17, 2014
Thought this would be great for ice fishing, but turned out not so much. No holes in the floor to fish through. The vents let in way too much cold air, the heater is weak (we froze). Very heavy, and not maneuverable-- make sure the ice is thick enough (28+ inches). We may turn this into a treehouse for the kids next summer when we retrieve it from the bottom of Lake Ontario. Did give 2 stars though, for the premium sound system.
0Comment| 5 people found this helpful. Was this review helpful to you? Report abuse
on April 7, 2015
I bought this tank thinking that it was a floating spaceship.

By the way, I live in the Galactic Star #920388823. I am not human. Where I come from, gravity does not exist in ways it does here on Earth. So, when I first had inquired about this tank, I immediately assumed that this was a floating spaceship. Being the Earth-geek that I am, I traveled 740,000 light-years and had to work at this place called McDonalds for over a year to purchase this tank.. only to find out that this was not a spaceship.

Now I am stuck here on this planet. There is no way of communicating back home at Galactic Star #920388823. So I found myself a nice American girl and settled here. I live in this place called California and the weather is quite beautiful. But I can't "drive" this tank around in this state. This one time I took this tank out for a test drive and oh boy, after 2 miles, I had to stop by the gas station and pay $4.00 per gallon; in total $75,000 in gas.

The seller must accommodate those who live outside of Earth, such individuals like myself.
0Comment| 10 people found this helpful. Was this review helpful to you? Report abuse
Top Contributor: Campingon November 8, 2012
I ordered this badonkadonk because I was in desperate need of a tank for my daily commute needs, (I live in an area that sees frequent adverse weather conditions, objects falling from the sky and where people often throw grenades out into the road). Ok, I lied, I orderded it because it was recommended as a purchase in correspondence to my black ops II pre-order...

The first thing that went wrong is mine was delivered in a box upside down. It is extremely heavy and requires multiple people to turn it back over for unpacking... Thank The Lord for the styrofoam package protection or I have no doubt it would have been damaged... *please note that this did not effect my overall product rating.*

I ordered mine with the optional .50 cal turret but was extremely surprised to find out that it was not a simple bolt on and required much cutting, welding, etc. this was a major disappointment as I had some friends over the day it was delivered that I would have enjoyed demonstrating it to.

The build quality is a completely different matter; as I anticipated it is as solid as a rock. I was also pleasantly surprised to learn that it is entirely water tight and can be used in waters as deep as 45feet before jeopardizing the integrity of the badonkadonk. *5 stars here*

Interior: I upgraded to the leather interior with natural wood accent trim panels. It looks really nice and features the mark VII Lincoln luxury package that gives you mood lights, etc.

My biggest complaints are as followed: (this was the deal breaker).

It runs off of napalm.. It is not easy to come by at my location and I have to have a license to special order it in and costs a ton of money! Not cool... I would consider this drawback the biggest financial set back since modern warfare 3's elite membership.

Additionally, even more irritating is mine was manufactured in 2011 and has absolutely no auxiliary port for my iPhone!!! Wtf! Get with the times badonkadonk!

Finally, the horn is really cheap sounding and it sounds like it belongs in a metro instead of this massive badonkadonk. This was easily resolved as I ordered an aftermarket ship horn... Sounds much nicer now.

Overall, I don't mean to knit pick but I wouldn't recommend paying anything more than the sale price of this item that I got it for. 1.3 billion dollars. (It was originally 1.7). If they would just add the iPod port it would be well worth it.
0Comment| 8 people found this helpful. Was this review helpful to you? Report abuse
on November 22, 2008
After blasting my music too loud one too many times, my next door neighbors got fed up and bought a Badonkadonk to teach me and my stereo speakers a lesson or two. I was quaking in my boots when the tank arrived on their doorstep.

They went after my shed first, which was made of straw. And they drove and they plowed and brought that to the ground. Then, my neighbors went after my garage, which was made of sticks. And they drove and they plowed and brought that to the ground, too. But when they tried to knock over my brick house, they rammed into the walls and broke their tank.

I'm unimpressed. Too bad they didn't shell out the money for the optional gatling gun as others here have done.

My music is louder than ever.
11 comment| 15 people found this helpful. Was this review helpful to you? Report abuse
on January 8, 2006
Fed up with much larger SUVs pushing me around every time I drove my Amigo down the freeway, I thought it fate I stumbled upon the JL421 Badonkadonk page while surfing for kitchen mixers on the Amazon site. Not a capricious buyer by any measure, I immediately began cross-shopping three other popular sites using "Donk" as a keyword and after filtering through several items that could only be described as lewd, I was certain the best deal available was through Amazon. 5 minutes later, it was in my cart and I was ready to check-out. Although it didn't qualify for free budget shipping like the Kitchen Aid, I thought $14.99 was perfectly acceptable for a tank.

Unfortunately, now that I've had mine for a few days, I find the Donk to be a bit of a let-down. First of all, as other reviewers have mentioned, it's much smaller than it appears in the photos here. It barely outmeasures the Freelander and is completely eclipsed by the Gelaendewagens I regularly encounter during my commute through the western suburbs. Second, although it does have adequate space for five passengers (as described), it doesn't come with five seats. I've partially remedied this by tossing in a couple lawn chairs I snapped up on clearance last fall at Target, but at this price I think it's reasonable to expect seating as standard equipment. Lastly, I have yet to find a Kayak carrier that fits it. I called Thule and Yakima to check for Donk availability but both inquiries were met with confusion followed by a long period of silence and then a dial tone. While some other minor details bug me too - like having to enter through the roof, no heater, no insulation, no exhaust system, no cupholders, tepid passing response, engine noise (it sounds strangely similar to a garden tiller at times), poor visibility, tank-like handling, wind noise (from both inside and outside the vehicle), et al. - I hate to nitpick. After all, no vehicle is perfect.

On the plus side, it really draws the stares. Everyone wants to know what it is and where I got it, but I'm keeping my lips sealed (sorry Amazon :-( ). Certainly the last thing I'd want is for every Tom, Dick and Harry to get one. Fortunately, it lacks any identifying badging so no one can know for certain that it's not the new Highlander.
11 comment| 40 people found this helpful. Was this review helpful to you? Report abuse
on December 26, 2007
I will tell you why I can only give the Badonkadonk two out of five stars. I know it may seem harsh, but let me explain before you condemn me.

I was so excited when I first found the beautiful, aerodynamic, fashion-forward Badonkadonk. I just KNEW that I had to have one for myself. You see, I have a very difficult job. I'm an office drone in a sea of endless office drones at a local hospital. I think I may have the most horrid boss on the planet. This year, we had just discovered that no one would get Christmas bonuses, because Dr. Sadistic sucked them down in liquid coffee form all year long instead of saving for us drones to be able to have some holiday cheer. A greedier doctor you'll never meet.

So you see, as soon as I saw the Badonkadonk, my head was immediately filled with fanciful images. I would smoothly careen up to work in my new tank, spying my boss scurrying in (late) from the parking lot, one of his ever-present Starbucks--he spends nearly all his money on those, sometimes consuming eight or twelve a day--in his hand. (Sometimes he'll actually make ME, at my $10-an-hour rate, go fetch him more Starbucks on my own dime. For shame.) I could picture his coffee spilling to the ground, staining his pristine white scrubs with the rich decadent elixir of wakefulness, with extra foam, as he turned around in shock and horror to see ME peeking out from the Badonkadonk, him in my sights. I knew this might be wrong, but I couldn't help myself from indulging in the fantasy for just a moment. I wouldn't harm him, I told myself, I would merely WING him.

Alas, it was not to be.

After month upon endless month of scrimping and saving, after selling off nearly all my wordly possessions and even moving back in with my parents, I finally had enough money to make my dream of the fantastic decadent Badonkadonk come true. Of course, I could never afford a NEW model. No, I was only able to get a used one. But I told myself that would be just fine. That would be enough.

Imagine my surprise and dismay when the Badonkadonk arrived from Mongolia! I carefully checked the picture, but no, it was simply not a match. Its sleek lines were marred by bullet holes, and it was adorned with spray-painted graffiti. The machine guns were warped and rusted. I could barely lift the hatch on my Badonkadonk. No amount of spit and polish could get this beauty shipshape. I shed a few tears, let me tell you.

My parents were so disgusted with me that they kicked me out. Now I live in the Badonkadonk, but when I pull up to work, my boss doesn't even raise an eyebrow anymore. He's too busy slurping down his second Starbucks of the day to pay me any attention.

This year I'm saving up for arsenic. I realize it's less impressive, but I can only hope it'll be more effective.
11 comment| 13 people found this helpful. Was this review helpful to you? Report abuse
on May 17, 2006
Pros: Underbody lighting and overhead body storage. Retro Jules Verne style, reminiscent of the Macintosh G5 tower. Optional lawnmowing undercarriage.

Cons: Cannot maneuver fastfood drive-thrus, even the ones you have to circle the parking lot 4 times to get into. Cannot fly. The all metal construction is incapable of providing any sort of defense to an attack from Dr. Magneto. The backing up "BEEP BEEP BEEP" can only be heard 4 blocks away. No cup holder.

This order got off to a rough start (though Amazon's patented ordering process is superb!), with UPS moaning and groaning about delivery, like that's my problem (it isn't). Then the Homeowners Association went ballistic, though there is NOTHING in their freekin rules concerning tanks. I had to park it in the street because there's no room in my garage where I store illegal aliens. This is not an adult-friendly tank. Adults expect more from a tank - like cup holders. My nemesis neighbor next door (who also happens to be the President of the Homeowners Association) got a surplus WWII Sherman tank off of eBay, and built a garage around it, so this Badonkadonk was not sufficient for my needs or intentions.

I met no resistance when returning the tank.
0Comment| 43 people found this helpful. Was this review helpful to you? Report abuse
on August 21, 2014
If you think this tank is going to protect you from wackjob Jedi knights with light sabers, think again. One swing of that electrophallus and my Badonkadonk ended up in the Sarlacc pit. Would not recommend, especially for those who live in the Gobi steppes. Or on Tatooine. The only reason I refrained from a one star review is that it runs over bantha fodder with nary a bump.
0Comment| 4 people found this helpful. Was this review helpful to you? Report abuse

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