- Series: Agency/Distributed
- Hardcover: 256 pages
- Publisher: AMACOM; 1 edition (September 15, 2009)
- Language: English
- ISBN-10: 0814414036
- ISBN-13: 978-0814414033
- Product Dimensions: 1 x 6.2 x 9.2 inches
- Shipping Weight: 15.2 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
- Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars See all reviews (539 customer reviews)
- Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #44,588 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
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Just Listen: Discover the Secret to Getting Through to Absolutely Anyone (Agency/Distributed) Hardcover – September 15, 2009
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From Publishers Weekly
Goulston (Get Out of Your Own Way at Work) returns with a primer on dealing with hard-to-reach people in virtually every scenario—defiant executives, angry employees, families in turmoil, warring couples—through use of well-honed psychological techniques. Negotiating intractable situations is like driving up a steep hill, he posits, but most of us make the mistake of creating more resistance by shifting up; downshift, and you get control, he writes. His Persuasion Cycle filters illustrative snippets from counseling sessions during which he digs into an impressive bag of tricks—Magic Paradox, Impossibility Question, Empathy Jolt—techniques like martial arts moves: potent on their own, but even more powerful when you combine them. His successful persuasion case studies include negotiating a police standoff and assisting a married couple's conflict resolution. Chapter summaries feature action steps preparing readers to encounter similar scenarios, yielding a guide that is as entertaining as it is useful. (Sept.)
Copyright © Reed Business Information, a division of Reed Elsevier Inc. All rights reserved.
[starred review] “Drawing on his experience as a psychiatrist, business consultant, and FBI hostage-negotiation trainer, Goulston provides brilliant yet doable techniques for getting through to others... This book transcends the self-help category by promoting real communication.” --Library Journal
“an impressive bag of tricks… a guide that is as entertaining as it is useful” --Publishers Weekly
"The most useful (five-star) book on communicating... Everyone can be a better communicator with the right knowledge, and this book makes learning interesting and easy." --Lindsey Novak, nationally syndicated "At Work" columnist
"It's a measure of how contentious work relationships can get that the author, a psychiatrist, draws on hostage-negotiation techniques to instruct readers on how to deal with 'defiant executives, angry employees or self-destructing management teams'.... Mission accomplished." --Time Magazine
"useful and applicable techniques and strategies for everything from getting teams to work together, to handling narcissistic clients (or is that a redundancy?), and getting your message across to even the most impenetrable people" --Accounting Today
"Just Listen is a banquet of approaches and ideas that's easy to devour the first time around, and a flavorful feast whenever you use portions as a reference book. It's certainly one of the best how-to books of the year." --Inland Empire Business Journal
"A primer on dealing with hard-to-reach people in virtually every scenario -- definat executives, angry employees, families in turmoil, warring couples -- through use of well-honed psychological techniques. Illustrative snippets from counseling session reveal martial-arts like techniques: potent on their own, but even more powerful when you combine them. Chapter summaries feature action steps preparing readers to encounter similar scenarios, yielding a guide that is as entertaining as it is useful." --CareerBuilder.com
"Just Listen is not only helpful for any kind of business, it teaches a skill that will aid you outside of the office too." --Niche Magazine
"Just Listen is an excellent guide for learning how to break down barriers." --Pittsburgh Post-Gazette
“Readers learn how to listen effectively, shift an angry or aggressive person into a calmer, more receptive state, and use empathy jolts to bridge a communication gap.“ —Business Insider
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Top Customer Reviews
There are so many tricks offered, that for similar situations you end up having multiple to chose from. Mark at times points out to use another one if the first did not work. I therefore can see how in the end after reading the book, one may feel overwhelmed or even confused, which of the tricks to use when. It will require probably a lot of practice to use the appropriate trick at the right time.
Somebody who's day to day job is to assess people and their state of minds, is exposed to the curse of knowledge and may therefore forget that it took that person years to become an expert psychiatrist and to gather all the practical experience we find in his book. So I will probably start using one or two of the offered tricks at the time and try to get good at them before moving on with the next few.
In order to do that I first have to review areas that I feel I need to address within myself most and work the priority list using the tricks accordingly.
Trying to use everything at once you will probably get you in some awkward situations. Just count the number of wonderful questions that are offered for different scenarios...
So a few a the time. The good news is that you will have enough material to use for a long time.
Mark, thank you for sharing so much of your experience with us.
This book, Just Listen, is best kept on the shelf in a strategic place, within daily line of sight, where the title can be a clear yet gentle reminder to "listen well" in daily interactions with those around you.
The author, Dr Goulston (evidently a true pro in psychiatry, counselling, negotiation, crises intervention, etc) presents his principles and techniques in a straightforward manner, without bogging the reader down with technical jargons. The ideas and techniques that he presents are well illustrated with real-life examples that help the read to grasp and practice.
In all, it is a small book that packs a great deal of highly useful information and suggestions. It is also fun to read. It is highly recommended for anyone interested in improving interpersonal communication.
So here is a ginormous POWER THANK YOU for you Mark!!! I will be reading all of your books and looking forward to the new books you write.