- Paperback: 224 pages
- Publisher: Rodale Books (April 27, 2010)
- Language: English
- ISBN-10: 1605296732
- ISBN-13: 978-1605296739
- Product Dimensions: 5.5 x 0.6 x 8.4 inches
- Shipping Weight: 6.4 ounces
- Average Customer Review: 44 customer reviews
- Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,375,986 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
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He's Just Not Your Type (and that's a good thing): How to Find Love Where You Least Expect It Paperback – April 27, 2010
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From Publishers Weekly
Tired of trying to figure out if a relationship is right for you? Dating columnist Syrtash serves her solutions with a large dose of encouragement: "The man you are looking for is also looking for you." Though when it comes to substantial suggestions for improving your dating life that don't involve the pursuit of your "NT," or nontype, Syrtash is largely MIA. Women, she says, are too focused on their type even when their dating history suggests this type might not actually work for them. For instance, when Lahna looked beyond her type she fell in love - with a six-hundred pound man. Syrtash's formula for change ("Consciousness/Faith/Action") might sound easy, but remember, "When you are with the right match it will not be a thought, but a feeling." The author suggests ignoring what your parents, friends, or colleagues have to say about your love life, encouraging readers to "Date men you would date if nobody was looking," in a perky primer that offers few specifics to weary women actually on the lookout for Mr. Right.
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“In terms of love and relationships, Andrea Syrtash has "been there" and "done that" and has mastered the dating game; in part by throwing away the rules and proving it's not a game at all, but rather a journey that needs to be undertaken with exuberance, honesty and an appetite for the unexpected. Her voice is fresh, funny and relatable and the advice in He's Just Not Your Type is spot-on. I've already given my copy to my single cousin!” ―Ian Kerner, bestselling author of She Comes First and Be Honest, You're Not That Into Him Either
“Andrea Syrtash offers some of the most practical approaches to dating that I've ever seen. She takes the guess work out of it and teaches you how to lead with your heart. When I read her advice, "Date the person not the potential" it made me smile. Get her book today....and you'll be smiling too!” ―Lisa Nichols, bestselling author of No Matter What and featured teacher in The Secret
“As someone who married her nontype, I can confidently say that Andrea nailed the process of how to mindfully date men who recognize and encourage you to be the best version of yourself - and never (okay, rarely) look back on the chumps who came before.” ―Kristina Grish, author of The Joy of Text and Boy Vey!
“Written from a place of deep caring and experience, Syrtash points out that what we think we want, and what's really good for us are often two different things. If this wise book doesn't jolt you out of your old, broken dating patterns, nothing else will.” ―Evan Marc Katz, dating coach and author of Why You’re Still Single: Things Your Friends Would Tell You If You Promised Not to Get Mad
“Confused by your "bad luck"in dating? Then you're lucky to have found this book! Syrtash explains in a fun and entertaining way how you developed your dating patterns - then inspires you to think differently - snagging you different (and happier!) dating results!” ―Karen Salmansohn, author Prince Harming Syndrome
“Finally, real love lessons for single women without any "rules"! Kudos to Andrea for teaching us right from wrong and how not to settle for Mr. Maybe.” ―Sherri Langburt, Founder, SingleEdition.com
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Top customer reviews
In "He's Just Not Your Type (and that's a good thing): How to Find Love Where You Least Expect It," Syrtash encourages her readers to change their perspective and refocus their values while also offering the tools and exercises to help her reader do this. As a result of her extensive research and interviews, Syrtash offers numerous illustrations of people who found lasting love with partners who did not match their "type." It's one thing for someone to advise you in a vacuum to open your mind and give a nontype a chance, but it's another thing to be presented with story after story of successful marriages which almost never happened if the parties involved had continued to cling to their "types" (which "types", it should be noted, were not working for them and the pursuit of which often resulted in frustration and disappointment). Syrtash provides a fair number of anecdotal stories of women who refuse to go on a date with men who veer from their idealized version of Prince Charming or because of their misguided limitations (one example of this in the book is a woman who will not date a man because he lived above 14th Street in Manhattan) and the reader can't help but scratch his or her head in wonder. However, these stories allow the readers to see what his or her own limitations may sound like when presented objectively. While the tone of the book is upbeat and nurturing, Syrtash also doles out her share of tough love (e.g. observing saying "I can't" is a guise for saying "I won't" and advising that she does not believe anyone is "unlucky in love" - we are all a product of our choices).
Among the compelling stories the author shares is her own. She is frank about her decision to stay in a comfortable but unfulfilling relationship for several years with someone who was her "type on paper" and her failure to initially recognize the potential her (now) husband had to be the perfect partner for her. Sharing her personal journey, Syrtash leads by example and offers a hopeful and positive take away: change your perspective and you may very well change your "luck."
While the advice to drop one's preconceived dating notions by the wayside in order to find love has been said before, Syrtash conveys this message in a fresh and highly effective manner. As someone who reads a good number of books in this genre, I found "He's Just Not Your Type (and that's a good thing)" to be among the best I have come across in its content and delivery.
Marni Galison, President and Founder
Sunday at Noon, Matchmaking and Events
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