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About Kevin FitzMaurice
Mr. FitzMaurice has a variety of formal and advanced training in counseling, which includes Addictions Counseling, Family Therapy, advanced Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy (REBT), Transactional Analysis (TA), and over 1,650 hours of diverse training for continuing education units (CEUs). To make the best use of that extensive training, he takes an integrative approach, grounding himself in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (REBT and CBT) and using the other theories to build upon that one core theory, rather than focusing on multiple theories and mastering none of them.
After more than twenty-five years in counseling, Mr. FitzMaurice has worked in the substance abuse field, directed two community mental health programs, and spent many years counseling in private practice. In that time, he has refined many principles for and methods of counseling. He now puts those methods, principles, and techniques into book form to share them with a broader audience, so more people can benefit than he can reach in person. Currently, he has more than forty books written, more than thirty of which are available worldwide as e-books from Amazon, Barnes&Noble, Google, Kobo, and Apple.
The philosophical odyssey of Mr. FitzMaurice began in the late '60s. It has remained a mostly self-taught pursuit, with little formal training or education in philosophy. The odyssey started with Western philosophy and a study of pragmatism and atheism. For example, he read every work of Nietzsche that had been translated into English at that time. From there, he moved to the study of Zen, Buddhism, Hinduism, and a misguided experimentation with psychedelics to achieve states of superconsciousness. He continued into Eastern philosophy, pursuing Taoism and J. Krishnamurti.
Next came a study of Christianity that consisted of seven readings of the Old Testament and nine readings of the New Testament, from cover to cover and word for word. This study was followed by a formal survey of Western psychology. The ongoing influences for FitzMaurice's thinking continue to be Christianity, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (REBT), General Semantics, and an Eastern combination of Taoism, J. Krishnamurti, Yoga, and Zen.
Academic Credentials: Master of Science (M.S.) in guidance and counseling, with a specialization in agency counseling, from the University of Nebraska. Associate of applied science in human services--chemical dependency counseling (with honors), from Metropolitan Community College.
National Certifications: National Certified Counselor (NCC) [active for 20+ years, now expired]; Certified Clinical Mental Health Counselor (CCMHC) [active for 20+ years, now lapsed]; Family Certification in REBT; Primary Certification in REBT; and Advanced Certification in REBT.
State Certifications: Certified Alcohol and Drug Counselor and Certified Gambling Addiction Counselor in the state of Nebraska. Both were allowed to lapse.
State Licensure: Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC) in Oregon [lapsed in 2018]; previously Licensed Independent Mental Health Practitioner (LIMHP) in Nebraska; and previously Licensed Mental Health Counselor (LMHC) in Iowa.
Community Service: One of the founders of the Francis House, Siena House, and Stephen Center homeless facilities still in operation in Nebraska. Organizer of free yoga classes for 4-5 years in his local community before moving.
Recommended Organizations for World Change: Fellowship for Intentional Community (ic.org), The Cohousing Association of the United States (cohousing.org), The Federation of Egalitarian Communities (thefec.org), Global Ecovillage Network (ecovillage.org), NuMundo (numundo.org), North American Students of Cooperation (nasco.coop).
READING LIST FOR 7 STEPS TO SANITY
Note: You can move around the steps and work on any one; however, progress does depend on doing each step.
Step 1: Practice Emotional Responsibility
The first step on the path to sanity is emotional responsibility.
1. To begin your understanding of emotional responsibility, read "Secret of Maturity, Fourth Edition."
2. To advance your understanding of emotional responsibility, read "Garden."
3. If you want to focus on your attitude and emotional responsibility, then read "Attitude Is All You Need! Second Edition."
4. If you are stuck in drama games as a lifestyle or if your family is stuck in a cycle of dealing with social services or the criminal justice system, then read "Garbage Rules." This book is also appropriate for those in early recovery, self-help, and 12-step groups.
5. Professionals who want to advance their counseling skills regarding emotional responsibility should read both "Garden" and "Not."
6. Anyone who wants the highest level of emotional skill and maturity should read "Stiffer: Stoic Mind."
Step 2: Upgrade Coping & Problem-Solving
Coping and problem-solving skills are needed at every stage on the path of returning to sanity. We are not born with these skills, and few of us have been formally taught them. Therefore it is logical and practical to pursue a complete understanding of them.
1. "Stress for Success, Second Edition" will help you to learn how to make stress work for you instead of against you.
2. "Breathe" will give you easy and simple exercises to instantly calm and center yourself in any situation.
3. "Garden" will teach you advanced coping skills that you can practice until they become habits.
4. "Problem Solved! 3Rs" will help you master problem-solving skills using a tried and true system.
5. "World Within: The Inner Life" will teach you about your inner life and how to make it work and keep it working positively and productively.
6. "Not" addresses the underlying problem of why coping and problem-solving fail.
Step 3. Discover & Reduce Ego Control
The third step on the path to sanity is to recognize the ego as the problem in all things.
1. To begin to understand how ego is your problem, read "Ego." This book requires you to be aware of your self-talk (inner dialogue).
2. To become more aware of your self-talk, first read "Garden."
3. To support and reinforce the work you learn to practice in "Ego," read both "What's Your Story?" and "Journal Journey from Ego."
4. To gain more insight into the false beliefs and thinking errors of self-esteem and ego, read "Planet Earth: Insane Asylum for the Universe, Second Edition."
5. To understand the ego in social relationships, read "Games Ego Plays."
6. To develop greater insight into ego and skills in spotting ego, read "Ego Playground."
Step 4. Rediscover Authentic Self
The fourth step is to strengthen your understanding of your original nature.
1. Learn how you are not your self-talk by reading "Ego."
2. Strengthen your understanding of your original nature by reading "Self: Who Am I?"
3. Strengthen your understanding of your identity by reading "World Within: The Inner Life."
Step 5. Upgrade Thinking Skills
Thinking skills are needed at every stage of life. We are not born with these skills, and few of us have been formally taught them. Therefore it is logical and practical to pursue a complete understanding of thinking skills.
1. "Attitude Is All You Need! Second Edition" will help you to develop thinking skills in relation to your attitudes.
2. "Discovery Demands 5TP" will help you build your perspective-taking skills, which will empower you to be able to see more sides to any issue or problem.
3. "Garden" will teach you thinking skills from a CBT and REBT perspective.
4. "Not" addresses a specific and pervasive thinking problem (no-ting).
5. "Planet Earth: Insane Asylum for the Universe, Second Edition" will help you to recognize self-defeating belief systems.
6. "We're All Insane! Second Edition" will help you to understand and apply General Semantics principles to the development of your thinking skills.
7. "World Within: The Inner Life" will teach you about dialectics, duality, triality, the 5 Thinking Positions (5TP), and advanced thinking skills.
8. "Stiffer: Stoic Mind" will teach you the nature of thinking and emotions and how to make them both work for you.
Step 6: More Responsibility & Less Ego
These books support and reinforce your learnings about emotions, ego, and self in various ways. All of these ways will help you to stay on the path of increasing your emotional responsibility and lessening your time spent on ego.
1. "Planet Earth: Insane Asylum for the Universe, Second Edition" will help you to face and surrender self-esteem, faulty belief systems, thinking errors, and games.
2. "We're All Insane! Second Edition" will help you to understand and apply General Semantics principles to your practice of recognizing, removing, and replacing your ego.
3. Other titles are collections of ideas and sayings that will help you to understand all of the principles of these steps from various perspectives and through different expressions. These include "Acid Test," "Anything Goes," "Something For Nothing," and books in the "3D: Daily Dose of Discernment series."
Step 7: Improve World & Communication
These books will improve your communication skills and help you to understand and deal with social systems.
1. "Planet Earth: Insane Asylum for the Universe, Second Edition" will help you to face and surrender socially accepted insanity.
2. "How To Govern Anything" is for those who want to discover and practice a saner system of governing any size organization or country.
3. "Carl Rogers, Control Freak" is for professional counselors interested in applying Carl Rogers' primary technique.
* Share, Encourage, & Support: Please help others to recognize and walk the path of emotional responsibility and ego reduction by recommending our books and practices. Thank you.
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Blog post“Your body does not become fire even if your body is damaged by fire.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“Your body does not become the cold even if your body is damaged by the cold.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“You do not become your abuse even if you suffer from your abuse.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“Abuse is not an excuse to become either a perpetrator (other-abuser) or a victim (self-abuser).” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“The victim beYesterday Read more -
Blog post“You do not become the rain when walking in the rain because you are not your experiences.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“You do not become the snow when playing in the snow because you are not your experiences.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“You do not become the wind when walking against a strong wind because you are not your experiences.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“A car driving in the rain does not become the rain any more than you become your exp2 days ago Read more -
Blog post“Does your fork taste the food you put in your mouth? Then how do your thoughts about the food taste it?” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“Do your clothes feel the wetness of the water when you walk through a river? Then how does your mind?” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“Does your car feel the wind pushing it to the side of the road? Then how do your fears?” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“Does your house feel the hailstones dropping on the roof? Then how doe3 days ago Read more -
Blog post“The work is not you, but it might try to be you.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“The struggle is not you, but it often tries to be you.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“The trials and tribulations are not you, but you will be tempted to identify with them.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“Blending self with experiences is the problem before the problem.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
3 days ago Read more -
Blog post“I create nothing, but I can host anything; therefore, I should accept responsibility for hosting, not creating.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“I generate nothing, but I can host anything; therefore, I am responsible for influencing but not for being a cause.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“I am the source of nothing, but I can host anything; therefore, I am responsible for what I host and how it affects, but not for its origins or creation.” —Kevin Everett FitzMauric4 days ago Read more -
Blog post“You exist independently from your beliefs, judgments, and opinions—so act like it.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“You exist independently from your beliefs, judgments, and opinions—so live like it.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“You exist independently from your beliefs, judgments, and opinions—so attacks on them are not attacks on you.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“You exist independently from your beliefs, judgments, and opinions—so when they prove w6 days ago Read more -
Blog post“Be a temple for God, not ego.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“Be a temple for God, not pride.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“Be a temple for God, not people.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“Be a temple for God, not possessions.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
6 days ago Read more -
Blog post“Trying to be better than your parents by doing the opposite of what they did will often guarantee failure.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“If your parents were too strict, your being too lenient will actually cause more problems for your children.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“If your parents were too lenient, your being too strict will actually cause fewer problems for your children.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“Being a better parent than your parent1 week ago Read more -
Blog post“What are people anxious about but their appearance because they are judged to be their appearance.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“What are people angry about but their appearance because they are judged to be their appearance.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“How did appearances become living beings?” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“How will appearances live for eternity?” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
1 week ago Read more -
Blog post“The truth shall set you free, not you.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“The truth shall set you free, not beliefs, ideas, insights, or teachings.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“The truth shall set you free, not methods, practices, or systems.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
1 week ago Read more -
Blog post“What can harm can also heal, when it is used to become more reliant upon God.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“What can heal can also harm, when it is used to become more reliant on self or humanity.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“The agent or substance that heals can only do so because Energy is in charge.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“The agent or substance that harms can only do so because destruction (flesh nature, bottomless pit) is in charge.” —Kev1 week ago Read more -
Blog post“You can speak about a person’s characteristics only as a container, host, transceiver, or vessel because people have no other characteristics.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“All the common characteristics that are attributed to people do not belong to people because those characteristics belong to what people host, not to the people or hosts themselves.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“Characteristics such as strong, weak, kind, and mean belong to the contents that pe1 week ago Read more -
Blog post“Your ego offends your personhood—no one and nothing else can.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“Who is responsible for your ego? Blame them for your feeling offended.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“Yes, your self-image or self-concept can become offended; however, only if you offend them by considering and comparing them to lesser self-images and self-concepts.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
1 week ago Read more -
Blog post“You cannot improve your self; however, you can be your self.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“You cannot improve your self; however, God can keep your self under higher values.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“You cannot improve your self; however, Jesus Christ has become a new self that you can switch to.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
2 weeks ago Read more -
Blog post“You cannot be good because only God is good, but you can engage in more good acts.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“You cannot be virtuous, but you can be guided by virtue more.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“Seeking to become good is seeking to become a god, which makes you the enemy of God.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
2 weeks ago Read more -
Blog post“Your feelings and thoughts have an ecology, and every feeling and thought affects that ecology for the better or worse.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“Test your feelings and thoughts for how they affect the ecology of your being, and act accordingly.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“Encourage healthy feelings and thoughts and discourage unhealthy ones for your and other’s sake.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
2 weeks ago Read more -
Blog post“Awareness of receiving is the ground of being.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“If you want to feel grounded in yourself, then ground yourself in gratitude.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“The person who can hold their ground is the person who can hold their self.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“Stand your ground for Christ, and Christ will stand for you.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
2 weeks ago Read more -
Blog post“What moves through you is not you.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“What moves through you can be shared.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“What moves through you can be recorded and remembered.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“What moves through you can only be owned (captured and made to loop) by attaching your identity to it.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
2 weeks ago Read more -
Blog post“These feelings and thoughts are not me because I have them, and they do not have me.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“These feelings and thoughts are not my life because these feelings and thoughts will come and go while my life will persist.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“These feelings and thoughts are not my body because these feelings and thoughts will fade while my body will remain.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“These feelings and thoughts are not m2 weeks ago Read more -
Blog post“I want to do what is right for self as space.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“I want to make choices as space, not as things or thoughts.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“I want my decisions to be for the benefit and needs of inner space, not things or thoughts.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“As my inner space, I need God to guide me, not being, doing, knowing, ego, thinking, or somethings.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
2 weeks ago Read more -
Blog post“Be the insides.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“Your insides are your life.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“Your insides are the place and space of you.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“Your insides are the host for what you reflect and serve.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“What happens inside is not you; rather, you are where it happens.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
2 weeks ago Read more -
Blog post“Worry is not in charge of anything.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“Worry is not responsible for anything but worry.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“Worry has no magical or supernatural powers, but worry can act as negative prayer by adding expectations to it.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
3 weeks ago Read more -
Blog post“If you keep talking about somebody inside, then perhaps you will find someone there someday?” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“If you keep imagining somebody inside you, then perhaps they will reveal themselves to you someday?” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“If you keep imagining somebody inside you, then perhaps they will become more than an idea or image?” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“If you keep imagining somebody inside you, then perhaps they will beco3 weeks ago Read more -
Blog post“There is no changing or controlling anxiety because anxiety needs to be anxiety.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“There is no calming, comforting, relaxing, or soothing anxiety because anxiety needs to be anxiety.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“Once anxiety has served its function to warn you, then you need to switch from anxiety to problem-solving or coping.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
3 weeks ago Read more -
Blog post“You have no possibility to be anything but dead things.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
“The only thing you can be is a dead thing.” —Kevin Everett FitzMaurice
3 weeks ago Read more
• For centuries, people have been seeking to understand the underlying method by which healing practices from around the world help people.
• This book will teach you the answer.
• You will learn the single unifying principle behind nearly every healing practice in the world.
- Mind-moving will improve the strength of your attention and focus.
- Mind-moving will allow you to be the master of your feelings rather than their slave.
- Mind-moving will allow you to be the master of your mind instead of its slave.
- Mind-moving will allow you to be the master of your time.
- Mind-moving is the way that you detach your mind to stay calm.
- Mind-moving is the way to avoid focusing on what will lead to more problems.
- Mind-moving leads to a calm mind, which leads to better decision-making and responses.
- Mind-moving often instantly improves other exercises and practices when it is added to them.
• Wake up to your personal power and practice mind-moving (M-M) every day all day long.
• M-M is the Rosetta Stone that deciphers how healing practices and mental-strengthening practices work.
- Mind-moving is a fast, simple, and effective practice for a calm mind.
- Mind-moving can be done without anyone knowing or observing.
- Mind-moving can be done anywhere without any preparations or requirements.
- Mind-moving is effective and efficient for help switching to better habits.
- Mind-moving is effective and efficient for disengaging from games and manipulations.
- Mind-moving is effective and efficient for releasing negative stress.
- Mind-moving is effective and efficient for helping you with pain management.
- Mind-moving is effective and efficient for helping you to sleep at bedtime.
• This book is about moving your mind and how moving your mind helps you in many different ways—yes, moving your mind. You already do it (move your mind).
• Now you need to become aware of doing it so that you can do it more productively.
- Take charge of your life with mind-moving (M-M).
- Overcome your addictions with mind-moving (M-M).
- Overcome your depression or worry with mind-moving (M-M).
- Discover right meditation with mind-moving (M-M).
- Discover right yoga with mind-moving (M-M).
- Discover how to be centered with mind-moving (M-M).
- Discover how to live with integrity with mind-moving (M-M).
- Discover your personal power with mind-moving (M-M).
- How To Think
- How To Correctly Use Thinking
- How To Think Saner & Better
- How To Avoid Mistaking Thoughts for Things
- How To Make Friends with Deconstructivism
- Discover six reasons why you are insane.
- Insanity is being out of touch with reality.
- Active insanity is clinging to illusions and delusions.
- Illusions are misperceptions, misconceptions, and mistakes about reality.
- Delusions are misperceptions, misconceptions, and mistakes about reality that we have evidence against but cling to anyway.
- You can live sanely in an insane world.
- You must choose against the common illusions and delusions of your society and your conditioning.
- All the common illusions and delusions of the world are constructed through the misunderstanding and misuse of thought.
- Discover how thought becomes a problem when thought replaces reality.
- Discover enough information and examples to be able to negate thought as reality, which enables you to re-experience "what is."
- This work is an example of the power of the path of deconstructivism.
- In contrast to constructivism, deconstructivism frees the heart, soul, and mind to return to their original natures and natural senses.
- When you clean out the clutter that you are burdened with from your constructivistic conditioning, you will find a new "you" and a new world.
- Eastern philosophy, Existentialism, General Semantics, iconoclasts, and cognitive psychotherapy all make use of deconstructivism to achieve their goals.
- Be forewarned: If you choose to walk the path of deconstructivism, many will resent your bursting their reality bubbles along the way.
- Words have no inherent meaning, but words must refer to some meaning, else they are just noise.
- When one changes the referents of words, then the meanings of those words change.
- A change in context can change the referents of words, making the meaning change too.
- Two identical phrases, sentences, or groups of words might have different meanings due to such a difference in referents.
- Thus, people often claim or point out conflict in meaning where there is none.
- Their mistake is in thinking identical or similar word usage must have an identical or similar meaning in all situations wherein they appear.
- They easily and quickly forget that dictionaries list more than one meaning for most words.
- "Out of sight, out of mind," does not conflict with "Absence makes the heart grow fonder."
- Why? Because the referents of the first saying are preoccupied with the present and therefore forget the past.
- Conversely, the referents of the second saying are dwelling on the past and therefore miss or wish for the past.
- Both are true in context.
- How To End Ego
- How To Find Your Authentic Self
- How To Free Your Mind and Heart
- How To Reduce and Remove Ego
- This book is the first of its kind in the world.
- You will discover the real root of the ego.
- You will learn how to apply Western psychology to remove ego now.
- Instead of spending twenty years meditating to drop the ego, you can now uproot ego as fast as you are willing and able.
- The practices and plans in this book work with any ancient practices or techniques that you are now using or might use in the future.
- Get the freedom from ego you want now!
- This book provides you with a Seven-Step Plan to overcome the biggest problem in adult life: your ego.
- You will discover how the ego hampers your goals, health, and happiness.
- You will be motivated to live free of ego and to return to your original nature.
- You will realize how to recognize, remove, and replace the ego.
- You will develop three plans to live sane in an insane world.
- In Step One, you discover how the ego is the main problem in your life and the differences between ego and self.
- In Step Two, you learn how you keep ego alive in favor of self.
- In Step Three, you realize how to remove your methods for maintaining ego.
- In Step Four, you determine how to remove ego from your life.
- In Step Five, you discern how to replace ego with your authentic self.
- In Step Six, you understand how to replace your supports for ego with supports for self.
- Step Seven of the Plan
- In Step Seven, you learn how to develop three plans to make it all work.
- Plan #1 is an action plan to follow Steps 1-6.
- Plan #2 is a relapse plan to keep you on your action plan.
- Plan #3 is a recovery plan to get you back on your action and relapse plans if you fall off them.
- Are you teachable?
- Are you serious about giving up ego now?
- Are you ready, open, and willing to learn how to give up your ego?
- Buy are read Ego today and Enjoy living with less ego!
- How To Live a Mature Life
- How To Own the Power of Emotional Responsibility
- How To Stop Buying into Garbage
- This book describes maturity in understandable and practical terms.
- If you want to know what it means to be mature, this book is for you.
- If you want to know how to live a mature life, this book is for you.
- If you want to grow up or know what it means to grow up, this book is for you.
- With all our means of communication and education, how is it possible that many fundamental concepts and principles continue to remain a secret or a mystery to most people?
- What kind of educational system can call itself "education" and fail to discuss and explore fundamental human qualities like maturity?
- The research for this book uncovered a myriad of ways of approaching the same basic answer for the secret of maturity: maturity is responsibility.
- Most of the answers to "What is maturity?" come from either psychology or philosophy.
- The answers are listed or briefly described throughout the text.
- It is your job to decide what to do with all the answers.
- Start practicing what you understand, and more will come to you.
- Quite a few of the paragraphs in this book summarize concepts that are expounded in entire volumes elsewhere.
- Since this book is so condensed, it will be most effective when it is revisited after more experience of practicing maturity.
- Might we suggest that you first pursue those concepts that strike you as personally relevant?
- They will do you the most good today because those concepts will be emotionally valuable to you.
- Read the suggested references to those concepts, and locate other related works at the library or through Internet searches.
- If you learn and apply the lessons contained in this book, results are guaranteed.
- Anyone who learns to live maturely will find that he or she is in better health because he or she can handle stress better.
- Anyone who learns to live maturely will find that he or she has a better love life because he or she can handle interpersonal relationships and communication better.
- Anyone who learns to live maturely will find that he or she has a better career or work experience because he or she can better handle challenges, conflicts, stressors, work politics, and work pressures.
- How To Win at Social Games
- How To End & Exit Social Games
- How To Relate Without Social Games
- How To Map Social Games & Strategies
- How To Know Game Players & Their Moves
- Over 40 Diagrams Make it Easy
- This book is about the psychological or ego games that people play with each other, both in private and in their social relationships.
- Wouldn't it be great to be able to get out of ego games, without conflict, when others intend to play them at your expense?
- Wouldn't it be great to be able to recognize an ego game from the start, so that you might either redirect the interaction in a healthy way or avoid being locked into a stressful and unproductive ego game?
- Wouldn't it be great to learn ways of relating that don't involve ego games, even though we are all conditioned and trained to play psychological games?
- Once you understand the structure and style of ego games, you will find them clear and straightforward enough to see in everyday life.
- You will discover the fundamental roles, moves, and motives in psychological games.
- You will become aware of how to play ego games so everyone wins, how to get out of ego games, and how to avoid playing ego games.
- Don't you want to become more aware of when you are in an ego game?
- Don't you want to see the motives of others who engage you in ego games?
- Don't you want to learn how to avoid entering or starting an ego game?
- Instead of wondering what just happened in an uncomfortable interaction, you can learn to analyze the ego game and better prepare for it the next time it rears its ugly head.
- This book will stimulate, enlighten, and challenge you to live ego-game free.
- Discover how to identify ego games before they suck you in, why people play ego games, who plays ego games, and when they play them.
- It's not just the people you love, hate, or know who play these ego games you'll find that you do, too.
- And you'll learn how to free yourself of your favorite ego games in order to be more effective and authentic in your relationships and career.
- While exposing the foolish ego games of another person brings pride, there is also shame in detecting your own ego games.
- Part of the aim of this book is to get you beyond the pride and shame that result from playing ego games.
- This book also presents another style defined as "Cooperation" as a way to relate without ego games.
- This book includes some materials from a counselor-training workshop previously presented by this author.
- The benefit of Using the Map of Social Games & Strategies
- The benefit of Knowing the Players & Roles in Games
- The benefit of Knowing the Rules of Games & Strategies
- The benefit of Knowing the Agenda, Intentions, Motives & Payoffs
- While this book is designed to stand alone, you might find it more easily digested if you first read
- How To Understand Duality
- How To Move Beyond Duality to Triality
- How To Make Dialectics Work for You
- How To Use the 5 Thinking Positions for Sanity
- This book is about discovering your world within your physical body.
- Please read it to discover what an inner life is and how to enjoy having a productive and purposeful inner life.
- For example, you will discover what an inner life consists of, how it works, how it fails, how to get working again, and how to keep it working.
- Read this book to discover how to make your heart, soul, and mind work for you, not against you or each other.
- Read and discover the first new psychology of the mind to be revealed in decades.
- World Within presents a model of inner life based upon dialectics.
- Dialectics can be understood as an internal dialogue between a set of dualities, a pair of opposites, or a yin and yang dichotomy.
- Dialectics is explained and explored at length to provide awareness and insight into the nature of attention, internal processes, and thinking.
- Our model for dialectics is called Ping-Pack-Pong (P-P-P).
- This model covers the middle ground and process of dialectics, as well as the dichotomies themselves that are the two opposites.
- The P-P-P model is used in order to provide an effective means of analysis and understanding for how internal dialectics work or fail depending upon how they are organized, processed, structured, and used.
- Many chapters also address various identity issues.
- The first chapter explores the parts and components that make up your inner life, stressing the importance of having an inner life along with understanding its purpose and function.
- The first chapter also examines the nature of self in relation to your internal conversations and dialogue, as well as your three internal attentions and how they function, relate, and work either together or at cross purposes.
- The second chapter explains dialectics as the means and mechanism of thought.
- The third chapter focuses on how inner dialectics are beneficial and how they can work effectively and efficiently.
- The fourth chapter focuses on how to be aware of, explore, and map your inner dialectics using the Ping-Pack-Pong paradigm.
- The fifth chapter focuses on the problem and the issue of Complex Ping-Pack-Pongs.
- The sixth chapter focuses on solutions that fail to help the problems of dysfunctional dialectics.
- The seventh chapter focuses on the problems of "not-ing" (of trying to undo P-P-Ps).
- The eighth chapter focuses on solutions that work to get dialectics functioning properly and constructively again.
- The ninth chapter applies some of the book's understanding of dialectics to the problem of addiction.
- The tenth and final chapter of the main text provides spiritual solutions to problematic dialectics as well as a spiritual understanding of dialectical processes.
- The back matter or end matter of the book contains information about the author, recommendations for more of the author's books according to their intended usage, books listed as references and reco
- Discover How to Problem-Solve Simply
- Discover How to Problem-Solve Completely
- Discover How to Make Problem-Solving a Life Skill
- Results: Let Others Whine While You Fix It
- Results: Let Others Worry While You Fix It
- Results: Let Others Waste Time While You Fix It
- This book is about how to problem-solve using the 3Rs (Recognize, Remove, Replace).
- There are 31 illustrations counting tables.
- The 3Rs is a three-step solution designed to promote effective and efficient problem-solving. While the 3Rs are most natural to apply and understand as a method of problem-solving, the 3Rs are not limited to applications involving problem-solving.
- You can use the 3Rs to find closer approximations to some dream or ideal, to fix something that is broken or not working, to improve current business practices or systems, to make action plans for your life, to plan for change or disaster, and to cope with difficulties.
- A complete explanation of the 3Rs, along with definitions, is provided in the first chapter.
- The second chapter provides examples of the 3Rs in practice.
- The third chapter applies the 3Rs as a metatheory for counseling, shows how to use the 3Rs for relapse prevention and recovery, and demonstrates an advanced form of the 3Rs known as the 7Rs.
- The fourth chapter applies the 3Rs to the issue of self-esteem and how to thrive despite self-esteem.
- The fifth chapter helps with understanding and using emotions constructively.
- In this book, you are encouraged to solve problems genuinely by not removing only symptoms, but by also removing the underlying intentions, maintainers, payoffs, reinforcements, supports, supporters, and sustainers for problems.
- Examples of some of the issues addressed include: attitudes, ego, expectations, feelings, mental blocks, self-defeating habits, and self-esteem.
- A new paradigm or model for understanding feelings is also provided, and the 3Rs are applied to that model to help you to increase your healthy feelings and to reduce your unhealthy feelings.
- Many tables are included throughout the book in order to simplify and reinforce your discovery, learning, and problem-solving skill development.
- Referring to the tables can remind you of critical insights and the contents of entire sections, if not whole chapters.
- Better problem-solving produces better living and working. Solve problems better and live better today with the 3Rs.
- How To Feel Better and Get Better
- How To Brighten Your Mind and Heart with CBT
- How To Practice CBT Self-Help
- How To Practice Guided Self-Help with CBT
- How To Improve Your Mood and Responses
- A garden is where you grow food and herbs to nourish and heal and flowers to please and inspire.
- A garden is where you protect and care for plants that provide you with multiple benefits in return.
- A garden is where you continually uproot the weeds that are interfering with the health and growth of your plants, herbs, and flowers.
- Gardening is caring for plants, so they might be healthy enough to produce value-flowers, vegetables, herbs, and fruits.
- Your mind is the soil in which sensations, thoughts, feelings, and attitudes take root.
- Whatever takes root in your conscious or unconscious mind produces fruit or results. Your conscious mind is the part of your garden you admit having.
- Your unconscious mind is the part of your garden that you hide in darkness because you do not want the weeds you grow there to be found and shame you.
- Be warned; you will get your hands dirty when you garden.
- You will see unpleasant weeds in your garden.
- You will get scratched and cut, pulling out your weeds.
- Suffering is unavoidable. Choose to suffer well.
- Understand that you will suffer from your weeds or suffer from pulling out your weeds.
- The suffering from your weeds is suffering badly, as it leads to a sicker garden.
- The suffering from pulling out your weeds is suffering well, as it leads to a healthier garden.
- You now have a clear and practical way to improve your life: the garden your mind analogy.
- By gardening your mind, you will improve your thoughts. By improving your thoughts, you will improve your feelings.
- By improving your feelings, you will improve your behaviors.
- And since your thoughts, feelings, and actions are an interconnected system, anytime you improve one, you help improve the rest.
- Synergistically, your mental, emotional, and behavioral health will enhance each other, all of which will enhance your relationships, peacefulness, focus, and life.
- Enjoy!
- Open your mind with the 5TP.
- Discover more viewpoints using the 5TP.
- Increase your creativeness by practicing the 5TP.
- Improve your coping skills with the 5TP.
- Increase your understanding by practicing the 5TP.
- Improve your ability to discover by using the 5TP.
- Improve your problem-solving skills by practicing the 5TP.
- This book is about discovering, understanding, and using the 5 Thinking Positions (5TP) in order to develop and increase your skill of perspective-taking.
- Perspective-taking is learning the skill of looking at difficult issues from various points of view instead of from only one predominant point of view.
- Perspective-taking allows you to understand people, places, and things from different points of view and thereby expands your horizons and insights.
- The 5 Thinking Positions (5TP) teaches an easy and effective method for practicing perspective-taking.
- Using a model of five boxes, columns, lists, or positions, you learn how to easily and quickly develop five perspectives on any concern, issue, problem, or topic.
- The five positions, boxes, or columns remain constant, retaining their names and usage, making it is easy to plug in opposite, conciliatory, and balanced views into any 5TP diagram for any concern, issue, problem, or topic.
- Discovering different perspectives on or views of reality in one area often results in opening your mind to discovering different perspectives or views of reality in other areas.
- Persistently practicing perspective-taking will lead to greater mental balance, flexibility, and openness, because perspective-taking, using the 5TP, is a yoga practice for the mind.
- And by having a more holistic grasp of the many sources of information available from using the 5 Thinking Positions (5TP) to improve your perspective-taking skill, you will also happily discover that your coping, creative, and problem-solving skills have also expanded and increased.
- Using the 5TP does not require you to change your mind, to alter your beliefs, or to accept other points of view.
- The 5TP does require you to recognize at least five points of view regarding any issue, problem, or topic.
- What you do with that understanding is entirely up to you.
- However, you might find that recognizing other sides and viewpoints helps you perform better as a boss, companion, leader, listener, and negotiator.
- The 5 Thinking Positions (5TP) will significantly increase your understanding of any issue, problem, or topic, especially if you initially see or think that there exist only one or two points of view.
- Such new understandings can go a long way to allowing you to find peaceful solutions to real-life problems.
- This book will first cover some of the advantages and disadvantages of duality and triality in order to prepare the reader to understand the distinct benefits of the 5 Thinking Positions (5TP) over duality and triality.
- How To Use the Rogerian Method
- How To Save the Work of Carl Rogers
- How To Save Counseling's Greatest Technique
- How To Use Roger's Technique
- This book is about the work of Carl Rogers, not the life of Carl Rogers.
- The personal problems Carl Rogers had with alcohol and his marriage have nothing to do with his counseling method.
- This short book focuses on the method of counseling that Rogers invented.
- The messenger is not the message.
- The distinction means that if Carl Rogers's method is to be evaluated, then it should be evaluated separately from his life.
- Was Rogers a wounded healer? Perhaps so.
- Method and technique are not to be confused with counseling theory.
- A counseling theory is a set of guiding principles that structure the course of counseling.
- A method or technique is a strategy for eliciting a response from a client.
- Counseling theories, therefore, provide general directions for achieving specific goals, while methods or techniques are particular strategies for promoting a change or curative response from a client.
- Carl Rogers gave the counseling world its most effective, efficient, and advanced method.
- Unfortunately, Rogers feared to face the true nature of his method and buried it under false philosophy and theory that diametrically opposed it.
- Rogers' betrayal of his method has led to a corruption of his method, causing it to be diluted, at best, and in many cases lost.
- We must separate the theory of Carl Rogers from the method of Carl Rogers to resurrect and preserve his superior method.
- Rogers was a unique genius who provided the counseling world with its best method, and both he and his theory are rightly honored and valued.
- His theory is simply humanism and self-actualization applied to counseling; something others have done both before and after Rogers.
- Rogers was an idealist, and most of his expounded ideals are noble and helpful.
- For instance, Rogers wanted teachers to be facilitators and resource persons for the discovery process, rather than merely a series of audio recordings.
- Both the method of Rogers and the theory of Rogers are valuable in their own right.
- Please re-experience the Rogerian Method in light of this book, and leave the rest to dust.
- If we could present the method as our own or something new, we would; but that would be a lie.
- Save counseling's greatest method for future generations.
- Let us increase the odds that more than just the lucky few can find a counselor proficient in the Rogerian Method.
- This book will help you discover the true nature of the method.
- But ultimately, you must work this out for yourself.
- You must again watch the videos of Rogers at work.
- You must again analyze his method.
- What Are Winning Attitudes?
- How to Choose Your Attitude
- How to Regain Your Attitude Power
- Rules to Use to Rule Your Attitudes
- Attitude Is All You Need! is about Attitude Power (AP).
- From reading it, you will discover how to increase your Attitude Power and how to decrease your attitudinal deficiencies and weaknesses.
- Don't you think that the time and energy spent on improving your attitude is worth the benefits to your relationships and career?
- Are you willing to learn rules for your sanity?
- Are you willing to learn rules for the management of your attitudes?
- You will learn many rules for managing your attitude.
- You learned a lot of rules in school for science and math.
- If you have a trade or profession, then you learned a lot of rules to be in that trade or profession.
- You may have learned rules in many areas such as: consulting, design, documentation, efficiency, ethics, handling, legal, materials, methods, processing, record keeping, safety, skill, tools, and various special procedures.
- Don't you think the time and energy spent on improving your mental health is worth the benefits to your relationships and career?
- Your methods of coping with stress can be used to understand some of the features and benefits of this book.
- You can obtain the following benefits by practicing the Attitude Power teachings.
- Attitude Power helps you to become more aware of your attitudes and the effects your attitudes have on you, your competence, relationships, and stress.
- Your awareness of your attitudes allows you to switch from ineffective or damaging attitudes to effective or helpful attitudes.
- Attitude Power can be used to lower your stress by helping you to choose a less stressful attitude.
- Attitude Power helps you to become responsible for your attitudes and stress.
- Responsibility regains control lost to victimhood.
- Your responsibility for your attitudes allows you to regain your personal power and to take charge of your attitudes.
- When you are feeling stress, you are more likely to look for internal methods of dealing with stress than to blame uncontrollable external sources; hence, you are better able to lower your stress.
- Attitude Power helps you to choose the most effective attitude for the situation.
- You also learn to choose to choose again after testing the results of your attitude choices.
- You can cope more effectively because your attitude not only does not get in the way of your coping--your attitude helps you deal effectively with the situation (a double win).
- Your stress is lower as you are more effective.
- How To Discover Insight Using Sayings
- How To Exercise and Improve Your Mind
- How To Increase Your Mental Capability with Aphorisms
- This book is a compilation of sayings useful in understanding Eastern thought and General Semantics.
- The agreement between General Semantics and Eastern philosophy is profound, illuminating, and deepens the understanding of both.
- For instance, the expressions, "The description is not the described," and, "The thought is not the thing," are found in both Eastern philosophy and General Semantics.
- Both systems arrive at reality as nonverbal, silent, and beyond comprehension with thought.
- This, despite the fact that one is spiritual, and one is atheistic.
- Two entirely different approaches arriving at the same ultimate conclusions is exciting and enlightening.
- You will find the sayings herein amusing, engaging, exciting, helpful, interesting, and thought-provoking.
- Many of the sayings are like Zen koans; if you sit with them, they reveal the other side free of words.
- Many of the sayings are open to multiple interpretations and meanings.
- New meanings will arrive on different journeys through the book.
- The same insight shared in different ways helps you not to miss deeper felt experiences for simple surface meanings.
- It often happens that a slight change in wording allows someone to drop their mind long enough to hear something fresh.
- One person's "that's obvious" is another person's "ah-ha" moment.
- Let the sayings pass that don't open to you now.
- Let sayings percolate and seep until you are ready for them.
- Focus on the sayings that bring stillness.
- Listen beyond the words.
- Feel, rather than think, the sayings through.
- Sense, rather than think, the music behind the words.
- In Eastern thought, the word "nothing" can have a profoundly positive meaning.
- For instance, "nothing" can mean the unknowable creative source of everything.
- Eastern philosophy has two major divisions; one that has gods and one that has a void instead of gods.
- The word "nothing" in this book often refers to this invisible, unfathomable, and all-powerful Eastern void.
- The word "void" is also to be considered positive in the Eastern philosophy sense.
- Perhaps, because of the negative connotations of the words "void" or "nothing," the Western mind would do better to think of "positive pure-energy" in place of void and nothing.
- The word "nothing" in this book can have many meanings other than zero: emptiness, empty space, formless energy, God, invisible power, no thing, no things as referents, no thoughts, no thoughts as referents, no thoughts being what they only represent, not thinging, self as space, the creative source, the ineffable, the life force, the nature of being, the positive Eastern void, the way of life.
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