Other Sellers on Amazon
+ $4.47 shipping
86% positive over last 12 months
Usually ships within 3 to 4 days.
+ $3.99 shipping
93% positive over last 12 months
Usually ships within 4 to 5 days.
& FREE Shipping
96% positive over last 12 months
Usually ships within 3 to 4 days.
Download the free Kindle app and start reading Kindle books instantly on your smartphone, tablet, or computer - no Kindle device required. Learn more
Read instantly on your browser with Kindle Cloud Reader.
Using your mobile phone camera - scan the code below and download the Kindle app.
The Kiss Quotient Paperback – June 5, 2018
| Helen Hoang (Author) Find all the books, read about the author, and more. See search results for this author |
| Price | New from | Used from |
|
Audible Audiobook, Unabridged
"Please retry" |
$0.00
| Free with your Audible trial | |
|
Mass Market Paperback
"Please retry" | $5.99 | $2.54 |
|
Audio CD, CD, Unabridged
"Please retry" | $59.99 | $40.06 |
- Kindle
$7.99 Read with Our Free App -
Audiobook
$0.00 Free with your Audible trial - Hardcover
$24.3531 Used from $7.93 5 New from $51.25 - Paperback
$12.2151 Used from $4.22 25 New from $7.64 - Mass Market Paperback
$5.9926 Used from $2.54 24 New from $5.99 - Audio CD
$62.013 Used from $40.06 4 New from $59.99
Enhance your purchase
“This is such a fun read and it's also quite original and sexy and sensitive.”—Roxane Gay, New York Times bestselling author
“Hoang's writing bursts from the page.”—Buzzfeed
A heartwarming and refreshing debut novel that proves one thing: there's not enough data in the world to predict what will make your heart tick.
Stella Lane thinks math is the only thing that unites the universe. She comes up with algorithms to predict customer purchases—a job that has given her more money than she knows what to do with, and way less experience in the dating department than the average thirty-year-old.
It doesn't help that Stella has Asperger's and French kissing reminds her of a shark getting its teeth cleaned by pilot fish. Her conclusion: she needs lots of practice—with a professional. Which is why she hires escort Michael Phan. The Vietnamese and Swedish stunner can't afford to turn down Stella's offer, and agrees to help her check off all the boxes on her lesson plan—from foreplay to more-than-missionary position...
Before long, Stella not only learns to appreciate his kisses, but crave all of the other things he's making her feel. Their no-nonsense partnership starts making a strange kind of sense. And the pattern that emerges will convince Stella that love is the best kind of logic...
- Print length352 pages
- LanguageEnglish
- PublisherBerkley
- Publication dateJune 5, 2018
- Dimensions5.44 x 0.93 x 8.2 inches
- ISBN-100451490800
- ISBN-13978-0451490803
Customers who viewed this item also viewed
Yes, she was lonely. Yes, she had a broken heart. But at least she had herself.Highlighted by 1,588 Kindle readers
People called it a disorder, but it didn’t feel like one. To her, it was simply the way she was.Highlighted by 1,355 Kindle readers
Michael was mint chocolate chip for her. She could try other flavors, but he’d always be her favorite.Highlighted by 1,353 Kindle readers
Editorial Reviews
Review
"The Kiss Quotient had me under a spell the moment I met the hero. I was excited, in love, and couldn't wait to get back to this book every time life forced me to put it down. A rare and riveting love story."—Penelope Douglas, New York Times bestselling author
“An unexpectedly sweet erotic romance that left me with a huge smile on my face. I dare you not to fall in love with these two characters and their story. Helen Hoang’s debut is quite simply delightful!”—Nalini Singh, New York Times bestselling author
About the Author
Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.
Chapter 1
“I know you hate surprises, Stella. In the interests of communicating our expectations and providing you a reasonable timeline, you should know we’re ready for grandchildren.”
Stella Lane’s gaze jumped from her breakfast up to her mother’s gracefully aging face. A subtle application of makeup drew attention to battle-ready, coffee-colored eyes. That boded ill for Stella. When her mother got something into her mind, she was like a honey badger with a vendetta—pugnacious and tenacious, but without the snarling and fur.
“I’ll keep that in mind,” Stella said.
Shock gave way to rapid-fire, panic-scrambled thoughts. Grandchildren meant babies. And diapers. Mountains of diapers. Exploding diapers. And babies cried, soul-grating banshee wails that even the best sound-canceling headphones couldn’t buffer. How did they cry so long and hard when they were so little? Plus, babies meant husbands. Husbands meant boyfriends. Boyfriends meant dating. Dating meant sex. She shuddered.
“You’re thirty, Stella dear. We’re concerned that you’re still single. Have you tried Tinder?”
She grabbed her water and gulped down a mouthful, accidentally swallowing an ice cube. After clearing her throat, she said, “No. I haven’t tried it.”
The very thought of Tinder—and the corresponding dating it aimed to deliver—caused her to break out in a sweat. She hated everything about dating: the departure from her comfortable routine, the conversation that was by turns inane and baffling, and again, the sex . . .
“I’ve been offered a promotion,” she said, hoping it would distract her mother.
“Another one?” her father asked, lowering his copy of the Wall Street Journal so his wire-framed glasses were visible. “You were just promoted two quarters ago. That’s phenomenal.”
Stella perked up and scooted to the edge of her seat. “Our newest client—a large online vendor who shall remain nameless—provided the most amazing datasets, and I get to play with them all day. I designed an algorithm to help with some of their purchase suggestions. Apparently, it’s working better than expected.”
“When is the new promotion effective?” her father asked.
“Well . . .” The hollandaise and egg yolk from her crabcakes Benedict had run together, and she attempted to separate the yellow liquids with the tip of her fork. “I didn’t accept the promotion. It was a principal econometrician position that would have had five direct reports beneath me and require much more client interaction. I just want to work on the data.”
Her mother batted that statement away with a negligent wave of her hand. “You’re getting complacent, Stella. If you stop challenging yourself, you’re not going to make any more improvement with your social skills. That reminds me, are there any coworkers at your company who you’d like to date?”
Her father set his newspaper down and folded his hands over his rounded belly. “Yes, what about that one fellow, Philip James? When we met him at your last company get-together, he seemed nice enough.”
Her mother’s hands fluttered to her mouth like pigeons homing in on bread crumbs. “Oh, why didn’t I think of him? He was so polite. And easy on the eyes, too.”
“He’s okay, I guess.” Stella ran her fingertips over the condensation on her water glass. To be honest, she’d considered Philip. He was conceited and abrasive, but he was a direct speaker. She really liked that in people. “I think he has several personality disorders.”
Her mother patted Stella’s hand. Instead of putting it back in her lap when she was done, she rested it over Stella’s knuckles. “Maybe he’ll be a good match for you, then, dear. With issues of his own to overcome, he might be more understanding of your Asperger’s.”
Though the words were spoken in a matter-of-fact tone, they sounded unnatural and loud to Stella’s ears. A quick glance at the neighboring tables in the restaurant’s canopied outdoor dining area reassured her that no one had heard, and she stared down at the hand on top of hers, consciously refraining from yanking it away. Uninvited touches irritated her, and her mother knew it. She did it to “acclimate” her. Mostly, it drove Stella crazy. Was it possible Philip could understand that?
“I’ll think about him,” Stella said, and meant it. She hated lying and prevaricating even more than she hated sex. And, at the end of the day, she wanted to make her mother proud and happy. No matter what Stella did, she was always a few steps short of being successful in her mother’s eyes and therefore her own, too. A boyfriend would do that, she knew. The problem was she couldn’t keep a man for the life of her.
Her mother beamed. “Excellent. The next benefit dinner I’m arranging is in a couple months, and I want you to bring a date this time. I’d love to see Mr. James attending with you, but if that doesn’t work out, I’ll find someone.”
Stella thinned her lips. Her latest sexual experience had been with one of her mother’s blind dates. He’d been good-looking—she had to give him that—but his sense of humor had confused her. With him being a venture capitalist and her being an economist, they should have had a lot in common, but he hadn’t wanted to talk about his actual work. Instead, he’d preferred to discuss office politics and manipulation tactics, leaving her so lost she’d been certain the date was a failure.
When he’d straight-out asked her if she wanted to have sex with him, she’d been caught completely off guard. Because she hated to say no, she’d said yes. There’d been kissing, which she didn’t enjoy. He’d tasted like the lamb he’d had for dinner. She didn’t like lamb. His cologne had nauseated her, and he’d touched her all over. As it always did in intimate situations, her body had locked down. Before she knew it, he’d finished. He’d discarded his used condom in the trash can next to the hotel room’s desk—that had bothered her; surely he should know things like that went in the bathroom?—told her she needed to loosen up, and left. She could only imagine how disappointed her mother would be if she knew what a disaster her daughter was with men.
And now her mother wanted babies, too.
Stella got to her feet and gathered her purse. “I need to go to work now.” While she was ahead on all her deadlines, need was still the right word for it. Work fascinated her, channeled the furious craving in her brain. It was also therapeutic.
“That’s my girl,” her father said, standing up and brushing off his silk Hawaiian shirt before hugging her. “You’re going to own that place before long.”
As she gave him a quick hug—she didn’t mind touching when she initiated it or had time to mentally prepare for it—she breathed in the familiar scent of his aftershave. Why couldn’t all men be just like her father? He thought she was beautiful and brilliant, and his smell didn’t make her sick.
“You know her work is an unhealthy obsession, Edward. Don’t encourage her,” her mother said before she switched her attention to Stella and heaved a maternal sigh. “You should be out with people on the weekend. If you met more men, I know you’d find the right one.”
Her father pressed a cool kiss to her temple and whispered, “I wish I were working, too.”
Stella shook her head at him as her mother embraced her. The ropes of her mother’s ever-present pearls pressed into Stella’s sternum, and Chanel No. 5 swirled around her. She tolerated the cloying scent for three long seconds before stepping back.
“I’ll see you both next weekend. I love you. Bye.”
She waved at her parents before exiting the ritzy downtown Palo Alto restaurant and walked down sidewalks lined with trees and upscale shops. After three sunny blocks, she reached a low-rise office building that housed her favorite place in the world: her office. The left corner window on the third floor belonged to her.
The lock on the front door clicked open when she held her purse up to the sensor, and she strode into the empty building, enjoying the solitary echo of her high heels on the marble as she passed the vacant reception desk and stepped into the elevator.
Inside her office, she initiated her most beloved routine. First, she powered on her computer and entered her password into the prompt screen. As all the software booted up, she plopped her purse in her desk drawer and went to fill her cup with water from the kitchen. Her shoes came off, and she placed them in their regular spot under her desk. She sat.
Power, password, purse, water, shoes, sit. Always this order.
Statistics Analysis System, otherwise known as SAS, automatically loaded, and the three monitors on her desk filled with streams of data. Purchases, clicks, log-in times, payment types—simple things, really. But they told her more about people than people themselves ever did. She stretched out her fingers and set them on the black ergonomic keyboard, eager to lose herself in her work.
“Oh hi, Stella, I thought it might be you.”
She looked over her shoulder and was jarred by the unwelcome view of Philip James peering around the door frame. The severe cut of his tawny hair emphasized his square jaw, and his polo shirt was tight across his chest. He looked fresh, sophisticated, and smart—precisely the kind of man her parents wanted for her. And he’d caught her working for pleasure on the weekend.
Her face heated, and she pushed her glasses up the bridge of her nose. “What are you doing here?”
“I had to pick up something that I forgot yesterday.” He extracted a box from a shopping bag and waved it at her. Stella caught sight of the word TROJAN in giant capital letters. “Have a nice weekend. I know I will.”
Breakfast with her parents raced through her mind. Grandchildren, Philip, the prospect of more blind dates, being successful. She licked her lips and hurried to say something, anything. “Did you really need an economy-sized box of those?”
As soon as the words left her mouth, she winced.
He smirked his assholest smirk, but its annoyingness was softened by a show of strong white teeth. “I’m pretty sure I’m going to need half of these tonight since the boss’s new intern asked me out.”
Stella was impressed despite herself. The new girl looked so shy. Who would have thought she was so gutsy? “For dinner?”
“And more, I think,” he said with a twinkle in his hazel eyes.
“Why did you wait for her to ask you out? Why didn’t you ask her first?” She’d gotten the impression men liked to be initiators in matters like these. Was she wrong?
With impatient motions, Philip stuffed an entire militia of Trojans back in his shopping bag. “She’s fresh out of undergrad. I didn’t want to get accused of cradle robbing. Besides, I like girls who know what they want and go for it . . . especially in bed.” He swept an appraising gaze from her feet to her face, smiling like he could see through her clothes, and she stiffened with self-consciousness. “Tell me, are you still a virgin, Stella?”
She turned back to her computer screens, but the data refused to make sense. The cursor on the programming screen blinked. “It’s none of your business, but no, I’m not a virgin.”
He walked into her office, leaned a hip against her desk, and considered her in a skeptical manner. She adjusted her glasses even though they didn’t need it. “So our star econometrician has ‘done it’ before. How many times? Three?”
No way was she going to tell him he’d guessed correctly. “None of your business, Philip.”
“I bet you just lie there and run linear recursions in your head while a man does his business. Am I right, Ms. Lane?”
Stella would totally do that if she could figure out how to input gigabytes of data into her brain, but she’d rather die than admit it.
“A word of advice from a man who’s been around the block a few times: Get some practice. When you’re good at it, you like it better, and when you like it better, men like you better.” He pushed away from the desk and headed for the door, his bag of condoms swinging jauntily at his side. “Enjoy your endless week.”
As soon as he left, Stella stood up and shoved her door shut, using more force than was necessary. The door slammed with a hard, vibrating bang, and her heart stuttered. She smoothed damp hands over her pencil skirt as she brought her breathing back under control. When she sat down at her desk, she was too jittery to do more than stare at the blinking cursor.
Was Philip right? Did she dislike sex because she was bad at it? Would practice really make perfect? What a beguiling concept. Maybe sex was just another interpersonal thing she needed to exert extra efforts on—like casual conversation, eye contact, and etiquette.
But how exactly did you practice sex? It wasn’t like men were throwing themselves at her like women apparently did to Philip. When she did manage to sleep with a man, he was so put off by the lackluster experience that once was more than enough for both of them.
Also, this was Silicon Valley, the kingdom of tech geniuses and scientists. The single men available were probably as hopeless in bed as she was. With her luck, she’d sleep with a statistically significant population of them and have nothing to show for it but crotch burn and STDs.
No, what Stella needed was a professional.
Not only were they certified disease-free, but they had proven track records. At least, she assumed so. That was how she’d run things if she were in that business. Regular men were incentivized by things like personality, humor, and hot sex—things she didn’t have. Professionals were incentivized by money. Stella happened to have a lot of money.
Instead of working on her shiny new dataset, Stella opened up her browser and Googled “California Bay Area male escort service.”
Don't have a Kindle? Get your Kindle here, or download a FREE Kindle Reading App.
Product details
- Publisher : Berkley (June 5, 2018)
- Language : English
- Paperback : 352 pages
- ISBN-10 : 0451490800
- ISBN-13 : 978-0451490803
- Item Weight : 11.2 ounces
- Dimensions : 5.44 x 0.93 x 8.2 inches
- Best Sellers Rank: #3,158 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- #11 in Comedic Dramas & Plays
- #116 in Sisters Fiction
- #153 in Multicultural Romances
- Customer Reviews:
About the author

Helen Hoang is that shy person who never talks. Until she does. And the worst things fly out of her mouth. She read her first romance novel in eighth grade and has been addicted ever since. In 2016, she was diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder in line with what was previously known as Asperger’s Syndrome. Her journey inspired THE KISS QUOTIENT. She currently lives in San Diego, California with her husband, two kids, and pet fish.
Customer reviews
Customer Reviews, including Product Star Ratings help customers to learn more about the product and decide whether it is the right product for them.
To calculate the overall star rating and percentage breakdown by star, we don’t use a simple average. Instead, our system considers things like how recent a review is and if the reviewer bought the item on Amazon. It also analyzed reviews to verify trustworthiness.
Learn more how customers reviews work on AmazonTop reviews from the United States
There was a problem filtering reviews right now. Please try again later.
The Kiss Quotient was marvelous!
So what happens when you're smart, have Asperger's and your parents want you to get married and provide a progeny of grandchildren but you aren't good at social situations or intimacy? Well, you hire an escort!!
Stella Lane is in her thirties. She is very successful and driven. She's an economist and a workaholic. She knows her limitations and having sex is one of them. She believes that if she can conquer her fears of intimacy, she can then be in a relationship.
Michael Pham is paying his mother's hospital bills by using his body as an escort. He's part Vietnamese and part Swedish. In other words, this combination makes him stunning. When his next job takes him to meet Stella, he can't help but be grateful. She fits his hot librarian fantasy to a tee. After their first meeting, he knows he's in trouble. He usually doesn't see a client twice but this time he wants to make an exception.
I love Stella and Michael together. Michael was so patient and understanding. He was also great with his whole family. He had his own insecurities and fears. I liked to think that being with Stella helped him realized he was worth it. Stella was amazing too. She tried her hardest to face her limitations. It takes great courage to try something new when you're so used to your routine and structure.
I can't but fan myself at their sexy times. Let's just say WOW is an understatement.
The Kiss Quotient was a wonderfully crafted novel. It's uniqueness and fascinating characters sets it apart from the rest.
I found myself doing a happy dance after finishing it. The ending was just perfect! I'm crossing my fingers we get to see more characters getting their own books. Mrs. Hoang has plenty of material.
Stella is a wonderful, fascinating character. I thoroughly enjoyed getting to know her and rooting for her. Michael almost matches her in interest. Their personalities and challenges are generally believable. I can't say their lapses back into self-destructive self-image are less convincing, but I was somehow not entirely convinced.
One genre convention I love is the HEA, which means I don't have to be worried about whether the cluelessness of either or both will prevent them getting the happiness they deserve.
This is the second ownvoices book i've read this year with a heroine who's autistic. I felt that the author did a good job of building on the awkwardness of Stella and Michael's relationship as it went from professional arrangement to more.
I enjoyed the scenes wit Michael and his family. When he hung out with his cousin Quan and the times at his home with his mom and sisters. Of course, the first meeting between Stella and his family made me want to cover my eyes cuz it was just an entire mess! I really felt for Stella there. But the other times Stella meets his family was pretty great, after that 1st disastrous meeting. I really liked seeing Michael cooking and interacting with his family and we get to learn bits of his Vietnamese culture.
I really wanted to hug and shake Michael at times. Especially with his dad's infamous legacy shadowing him his entire life and he feels like he could never be good enough for stella. And on the flip side Stella feeling like Michael broke it off cuz he pitied her for being autistic. I wanted to scream at both "you are so wroooong!!" get it together lol
But Michael did also annoy me at a few times. Especially when Stella's coworker kissed her and she's pretty upset and yup Michael's concerned BUT at the same time he came across as being a bit angry at Stella when bro cut her some slack she didnt want to kiss that dude. Simmer down.
Stellaaaaaa i really loved her. especially when she initially thinks she needs to change, be less different but soon realizes nah this is who she is and it doesn't make her less to be autistic.
And the ending was perfect for me. I loved how it was all wrapped up! I'm excited for the Bride Test, Khai's book (Quan's bro). We meet Khai very briefly in here and i can't wait for book 2!
Top reviews from other countries
1. If you don't like sex scenes don't read romance novels, this is a story about a woman who hires a male escort so I'm not sure what people were expecting. I know that there are the sweet genre Romance novels out there but I'm pretty sure that you can tell that this is definitely not one of those from the blurb so to criticise it for this is just ridiculous. That being said there was not nearly as much sex in the book as I thought there was going to be, yes there was a bit but it was in line with a lot of romance that I read and I read probably near to 200 books a year.
2. Several people mentioned Fifty Shades of Grey in their reviews which is the thing that actually nearly put me off reading this book. This book is in not related to 50 Shades of Grey in any way shape or form so completely disregard those reviews. If you are like me this is a good thing as in my personal opinion fifty shades is seriously overrated trash. Sorry if that offends anybody.
3. The last thing that more than one reviewer mentioned was about the author not having done her homework about Asperger's. If the reviewers had read about the author they would know that the author has Asperger's and for anyone who does know anything about it knows that it is called a spectrum for a reason. I don't think I need to say anything more about that.
So having gotten my grievances out of the way with the reviews I enjoyed this book very much and would recommend it .
I just loved it from start to finish. I'd had my eye on this for a bit, and when it was reduced in price on Amazon, I bought it on reflex. Then realised, with dawning horror, that I hadn't checked to see whether it was written in the present tense - which I generally remember to do, because I hate books written in the present tense.
Reading just the first paragraph would have settled the question (no, it's not - it's safely written in the past tense), but I just couldn't stop. I ended up reading the whole book in one sitting, only taking my nose out of it to walk downstairs (walking upstairs while still reading is much less dangerous).
On a more analytical level, this book had everything I want in a romance:
1. An intelligent heroine who uses her brain and is not a pitiful mess who needs a man to sort her out.
2. An intelligent and likeable hero, who acts like a civilised human being.
3. A plot that does not rely on otherwise intelligent people suddenly losing all common sense and doing things because the author needs them to.
4. A relationship that works. I expect these two will have their ups and downs - but I think they'll be all right in the long term.
Thoroughly recommended. The author has written another book - The Bride Test - and I will almost certainly get it. But I shall only open it when I have a free day!
I thought it was so cliche!
Meet Stella - beautiful but doesn't know it; sexy but doesn't know it; low self esteem although she's super smart and successful.
Meet Michael - gorgeous; mysterious past; talented; gorgeous; acts confident but has a low self esteem too; sacrifices himself for his family; gorgeous.
Stella has Asperger's; Michael also works as an escort and is hired by Stella to help her out with shyness and her fear of sex.
You can guess the rest, as it's sooooo predictable. I was sick and tired of reading how well they fit together (mentally and physically), how they both wanted the mock relationship to be real, how sad they both were knowing that the other didn't feel the same way, how gorgeous Michael was, how sexy his Stella was.
It just followed a typical romance, with all the tropes and cliches.
Write what you know, they say, and in her note at the end of the book author Helen Hoang reveals that she herself is autistic, so we can be confident that this is a good representation of how one autistic person may act or feel. It is a pretty interesting insight. The romance is sweet and the characters are likeable.
so why didn't I enjoy it?
Michael is perhaps just a little over the top, ridiculously good looking, highly talented and endlessly self-sacrificing. The fact that the plot constantly hinged on people jumping to the wrong conclusions and trying to sabotage there own happiness was gratingly annoying. Some of the plot twists towards the end were really ridiculous - details would be spoilers - but it was just too ridiculously convenient.
In my opinion, this was a great idea that went right of the rails halfway through, but, a lot of people do love this book - there is so much hype out there. I must be missing something.
Michael has been an escort for three years, working on the side to earn enough money to cover his mother's medical bills. It wasn't a career path he went looking for and he's become pretty jaded about both women and sex so he finds Stella's openness about her goals incredibly refreshing. Michael is patient, calm and willing to take things very slowly so that Stella is always in control and feeling comfortable with what they're doing. He listens to her fears, goes out of his way to make things easier for her and never makes her feel awkward. In fact, he's the first person who seems to like her for her quirks rather than in spite of them.
I really loved The Kiss Quotient, it's like a gender swapped version of Pretty Woman and the story was both sweet, sexy and incredibly romantic. I loved Stella's personality, she's very intelligent and caring so although she finds it hard to read people she works hard to understand Michael and his family. She's a total novice when it comes to relationships but the way things slowly develop between them was totally believable and I loved how willing they both were to talk things through and discuss their hopes and dreams. Michael has a lot of baggage of his own and doesn't feel worthy of Stella thanks to some things in his past but he was really sweet and protective of her and they just fitted together as a couple so well. I wasn't a big fan of Stella's parents but Michael's mother and sisters more than made up for that and this whole book just left me with a massive smile on my face.
It's not often that I fall so totally in love with a contemporary romance story but The Kiss Quotient was a one sitting read that I absolutely devoured and I'm definitely going to be purchasing everything that Helen Hoang writes in the future.












