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Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal Paperback – May 25, 2004
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Everyone knows about the immaculate conception and the crucifixion. But what happened to Jesus between the manger and the Sermon on the Mount? In this hilarious and bold novel, the acclaimed Christopher Moore shares the greatest story never told: the life of Christ as seen by his boyhood pal, Biff.
Just what was Jesus doing during the many years that have gone unrecorded in the Bible? Biff was there at his side, and now after two thousand years, he shares those good, bad, ugly, and miraculous times. Screamingly funny, audaciously fresh, Lamb rivals the best of Tom Robbins and Carl Hiaasen, and is sure to please this gifted writer’s fans and win him legions more.
- Print length444 pages
- LanguageEnglish
- PublisherWilliam Morrow Paperbacks
- Publication dateMay 25, 2004
- Dimensions5.31 x 0.74 x 8 inches
- ISBN-100380813815
- ISBN-13978-0380813810
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From the Publisher
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| The Griff | The Lust Lizard of Melancholy Cove | Practical Demonkeeping | Island of the Sequined Love Nun | Razzmatazz | Noir | |
| More by Moore | ✓ | ✓ | ✓ | ✓ | ✓ | ✓ |
Editorial Reviews
Review
“An instant classic . . . terrific, funny and poignant. — Rocky Mountain News
“[Moore’s] most ambitious book.” — East Bay Express
“I haven’t finished reading [LAMB] yet, but I’ve managed to laugh myself to tears on more than one occasion.” — St. Louis Post-Dispatch
From the Back Cover
The birth of Jesus has been well chronicled, as have his glorious teachings, acts, and divine sacrifice after his thirtieth birthday. But no one knows about the early life of the Son of God, the missing years -- except Biff, the Messiah's best bud, who has been resurrected to tell the story in the divinely hilarious yet heartfelt work "reminiscent of Vonnegut and Douglas Adams" (Philadelphia Inquirer).
Verily, the story Biff has to tell is a miraculous one, filled with remarkable journeys, magic, healings, kung fu, corpse reanimations, demons, and hot babes. Even the considerable wiles and devotion of the Savior's pal may not be enough to divert Joshua from his tragic destiny. But there's no one who loves Josh more -- except maybe "Maggie," Mary of Magdala -- and Biff isn't about to let his extraordinary pal suffer and ascend without a fight.
About the Author
Christopher Moore is the author of seventeen previous novels, including Shakespeare for Squirrels, Noir, Secondhand Souls, Sacré Bleu, Fool, and Lamb. He lives in San Francisco, California.
Product details
- Publisher : William Morrow Paperbacks; 32nd edition (May 25, 2004)
- Language : English
- Paperback : 444 pages
- ISBN-10 : 0380813815
- ISBN-13 : 978-0380813810
- Item Weight : 11.4 ounces
- Dimensions : 5.31 x 0.74 x 8 inches
- Best Sellers Rank: #11,590 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- #8 in Humorous American Literature
- #127 in Contemporary Literature & Fiction
- #163 in Humorous Fiction
- Customer Reviews:
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About the author

Christopher Moore is the author of 15 previous novels: Practical Demonkeeping, Coyote Blue, Bloodsucking Fiends, Island of the Sequined Love Nun, The Lust Lizard of Melancholy Cove, Lamb, Fluke, The Stupidest Angel, A Dirty Job, You Suck, Fool, Bite Me, Sacré Bleu, The Serpent of Venice, and Secondhand Souls. He lives in San Francisco.
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I’m not going too far if I say, Lamb by Christopher Moore is probably my most favourite book ever. I think it was recommended to me around 2009 – I remember bringing it with me to my first UK trip ever in 2010 and by that time I’ve read it at least once – and I instantly fell in love. In the past 10 years I’ve read it at least half a dozen times. And I still find it damn hilarious every time I decide to reread it. Though I’ve been mostly reading in English for the better part of the last 8 or so years, I think this is the first time that I read Lamb in that language. I have a well worn Hungarian paperback which I love to pieces – and which have a much better cover IMO – and a lot of memories dragging it halfway around the world. And since I have a pretty strong link with the Hungarian version, I was a bit afraid whether the enjoyment would be the same. Translations can be tricky and in recent years I’ve not been happy at how some books were translated into my language. I’m happy to report, that in this case our translator did a damn good job. The original version really lives up to my Hungarian memories.
Have you ever wondered who Jesus really was? About what happened to him during that 30 years the Bible doesn’t bother explaining? I can assure you, many scholars researched the topic, but probably none of them were as amusing as Christopher Moore‘s book. In Lamb we follow Jesus’ or rather Joshua’s life from the time he is six until his death. We watch him grow up, try his hands in miracles which later made him famous, learn how to be a Messiah. We follow him across half of the known world at the time until he returns to his home in Nasareth to be the man he was destined to be. But he wouldn’t be able to manage all that without his most trusted companion, Levi who is called Biff. Joshua – as he was called in Aramaic – , is depicted as a serious, emphatic, sensitive child who grows up into the man we more or less know from the Bible. Biff is his complete opposite, he is crafty, cunning and doesn’t say no to a little trouble making. But most of all, he is loyal to a fault.
“The Law says that two must go with the flock to keep an abomination from happening. I can spot an abomination from fifty paces.’ Maggie smiled. ‘And did you prevent any abominations?’ ‘Oh yes, I kept all of the abominations at bay while Kaliel played with his favorite sheep behind the bushes.’ ‘Biff,’ Joshua said gravely, ‘that was the abomination you were supposed to prevent.’”
They complement each other well, and in truth they are more brothers than friends. He also has a sense of humor which highlights the events all through the book. Because, when your best friend is the son of God, you have to suffer the companionship of the stupidest angel and you find yourself in impossible situations – like dealing with a yak, or getting your best friend out of a bag among other things), your only chance to stay sane is to develop a great sense of humor. And a healthy dose of common sense. The connection Josh and Biff have is really awesome and I have a soft spot for books which depict brotherhood such as theirs.
“Little Joshua spun on his heel. ‘My name is not Joshua bar Biff, and it is not Joshua bar Joseph either. It’s Joshua bar Jehovah!’ I looked around, hoping that no one had heard him. I didn’t want my only son (I planned to sell Judah and James into slavery) to be stoned to death for uttering the name of God in vain. ‘Don’t say that again, Josh. I won’t marry your mother.’ ‘No, you won’t.’ ‘I’m sorry.’ ‘I forgive you.’ ‘She will make an excellent concubine.’ Don’t let anyone tell you that the Prince of Peace never struck anyone. In those early days, before he had become who he would be, Joshua smote me in the nose more than once. That was the first time.”
As Joshua tries to figure out what it means to be Messiah and how can he become one, together they set off to find the three Magicans who visited Joshua upon his birth. Their adventure lead them to Balthasar in Kabul, Gaspar in China and Melchior in India. In all three places they learn about the teachings of famous philosophies and ideas which later shines through his teachings. Out of the three destinations they visited, my favorite was Kabul and Balthasar’s home with the seven Chinese concubines and the mysterious iron door. Gaspar and the monostor was a fun one too, where Joshua and Biff has to learn to ju-do. The parts about India, while were interesting, felt a bit rushed and we didn’t spend as much time there to be able to properly immerse ourselves in it.
“Rumi had expressed my sentiments exactly, but I would be damned if I was going to let my last words be ‘Eek, a tiger,’ so I listened quietly as urine filled my shoes.”
The last part of the book retells the story we know better from the Bible – how Joshua becomes the teacher people look up at, how he performs miracles and gets on the wrong side of the Sadducees and Pharisees. Even though you well damn know what is going to happen, you can’t help but sit on the edge of your seat as you read and feel ALL the emotions. I swear I have a lump in my throat every time I near the end.
“Since I could remember, my friendship with Joshua had been my anchor, my reason for being, my life; now it, he, was running toward destruction like a storm-driven ship to a reef, and I couldn’t think of a thing to do but panic.”
Lamb is, to put it simply a masterpiece. It has the right balance of adventure, humor, serious topics, mystery, history. I loved all the little Easter eggs Moore put into this book referring to historical events, people (a guy from Turin takes a cloth from Joshua after he cleans his face with it!!), etc. Not talking about how much research he must have put in to give back the atmosphere of the era, the traditions of Jews and the stories we know from the Bible. But thourough research and exquisite writing wouldn’t have been enough to have a near perfect book. What makes Lamb exceptional is the humor and the characters that Moore brought to life. No matter how many times I read it, I just can’t help laughing out loud or be sad or excited for them to succeed in their quest.
You absolutely have to read this book if you like Moore‘s books, love humor, want an alternative history about who Jesus was, enjoy reading about adventure, drama and prefer a character driven story. In short: READ THIS BOOK!
Some thing that all prospective readers of this book should realize is that not only is it fictional, but the author tells the story in a funny way and pokes fun at everyone from the Pharisees and Sadducees of that time, through the Jews and into everyone else. If you like sarcasm and cynicism then this book will really make you burst out laughing. If, on the other hand, you take your religion seriously - any religion, not just Christianity - then this book will verge on the blasphemous. Be forewarned about that before you pick it up.
Biff (nickname - his real name is Levi) and Joshua meet up when they are six years old or thereabouts and immediately become friends. Within a couple of years, Mary of Magdala moves into the neighborhood and the three become inseparable. Mary has a huge crush and love for Joshua, but he is not willing to be with any woman. Biff on the other hand has no such compunctions and never hesitates to find a way to spend nights with women of any kind. The story of Jesus's first thirty years is told by Biff and it follows the pair as they try to figure out how Joshua will become the messiah. This trail takes them through most of Asia and many years and introduces us to the three magi in somewhat different incarnations. The pair learn lots of interesting things - some of which become the basis for Christianity - and eventually find themselves coming back to Israel for Joshua to start his preaching. The end of the story is not unusual but there are several twists there that you might not expect.
In the beginning I thought the book was very funny but the sarcasm eventually wore me down and I was not that thrilled with the way the book proceeded. I think the turning point was where Biff and Joshua encounter the Indian Untouchable cast and the author describes in minute detail how horrible their lives are. I did not find anything funny in their plight and the rest of the book simply wilted away. Another things that started out clever, but quickly became irritating is that Biff and Joshua speak to each other in a modern American Idiom - how likely is that? Since Biff has been dead for over two thousand years, the author has an angel come to earth to resurrect Biff so he can write his story down. Why is it that it is now important to do so is never explained.
All in all this is an interesting concept but I thought it had some problems so I only give this book four stars.
Top reviews from other countries
Levi is tasked with writing the gospel because he and Jesus (Joshua) were childhood friends. They travelled together through Asia seeking out the three wise men and remained close until Jesus’s crucifixion and subsequent resurrection.
Raziel takes Levi to a hotel in Missouri, USA, to write the gospel. Raziel watches TV, while Levi writes. Through Levi’s eyes, Moore tells the story of the missing years, checking in occasionally on Raziel and Levi in their shared room.
I enjoyed Moore’s ‘A Dirty Job’ last year and wanted to read something else from his back catalogue. ‘Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal’ was very warmly received by the Goodreads community, so I downloaded it to my Kindle.
I enjoyed ‘Lamb’ even more than ‘A Dirty Job’. Clearly, a lot of work had gone into researching the background for the story, and the humour was plentiful. Moore engaged me and made me smile throughout the book and, at several junctures, had me laughing out loud. Hugely entertaining!
Lamb is pure genius. Let’s be honest, we were all stupid teens at one point in time. When you sit back and think about it, people everywhere from every time are more or less the same. Did Napoleon get picked on by the other boys because he needed a stool to get on his horse? Did Abraham Lincoln burn down a lob cabin while farting over an open flame? Was Attila the Hun afraid to kiss a girl? It’s fun to imagine what historic people would have been like when they were stupid teens.
This book had me laughing out loud, reading great one-liners and hilarious scenarios to my ever-patient wife, who has not yet forbidden me from speaking to her while she is reading. I loved how Moore created these magical scenes that would develop a theme or flat out statement from the Bible. For me, Lamb had a Forrest Gump appeal to it. Through the comedy, Moore told a heartwarming tale that portrayed the life of Jesus Christ in a whole new perspective. As a reader, I had a window into the events and influences that created the man. Yes, I know that it’s fiction, but it seemed plausible.
The characters. I just can’t say enough about the characters created by Moore. Biff, of course, carries the story. He is the peanut butter to Jesus’ jelly. Biff allowed us to see Jesus for who he was, a person just like any of us. They argued, farted and had each other’s backs. They were normal, yet exceptional. Moore didn’t neglect any of the other characters. I was able to see many familiar characters in a whole new light. Best of all, was his treatment of Jesus. We got to know the boy who became the man. We saw his struggles, his pain and torment, but we also saw him have fun and learn. There was nothing irreverent about the character.
Lamb might not be for everyone. The close-minded at one end of the spectrum or the other will hate it because they are supposed to. It’s fictional hypothesizing, enjoy it for what it is. And that’s all I have to say about that.
Une grosse grosse barre de rire en tout cas. Le roman s'entrecoupe a priori de créatures d'autres ouvrages du même auteur, ce qui me donne envie de lire plus!















