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Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal Paperback – May 25, 2004
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Everyone knows about the immaculate conception and the crucifixion. But what happened to Jesus between the manger and the Sermon on the Mount? In this hilarious and bold novel, the acclaimed Christopher Moore shares the greatest story never told: the life of Christ as seen by his boyhood pal, Biff.
Just what was Jesus doing during the many years that have gone unrecorded in the Bible? Biff was there at his side, and now after two thousand years, he shares those good, bad, ugly, and miraculous times. Screamingly funny, audaciously fresh, Lamb rivals the best of Tom Robbins and Carl Hiaasen, and is sure to please this gifted writer’s fans and win him legions more.
- Print length444 pages
- LanguageEnglish
- PublisherWilliam Morrow Paperbacks
- Publication dateMay 25, 2004
- Dimensions5.31 x 0.74 x 8 inches
- ISBN-100380813815
- ISBN-13978-0380813810
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From the Publisher
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| The Griff | The Lust Lizard of Melancholy Cove | Practical Demonkeeping | Island of the Sequined Love Nun | Razzmatazz | Noir | |
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| Price | $13.56$13.56 | $15.19$15.19 | $15.19$15.19 | $14.39$14.39 | $9.99$9.99 | $14.39$14.39 |
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Editorial Reviews
Review
“An instant classic . . . terrific, funny and poignant. — Rocky Mountain News
“[Moore’s] most ambitious book.” — East Bay Express
“I haven’t finished reading [LAMB] yet, but I’ve managed to laugh myself to tears on more than one occasion.” — St. Louis Post-Dispatch
From the Back Cover
The birth of Jesus has been well chronicled, as have his glorious teachings, acts, and divine sacrifice after his thirtieth birthday. But no one knows about the early life of the Son of God, the missing years -- except Biff, the Messiah's best bud, who has been resurrected to tell the story in the divinely hilarious yet heartfelt work "reminiscent of Vonnegut and Douglas Adams" (Philadelphia Inquirer).
Verily, the story Biff has to tell is a miraculous one, filled with remarkable journeys, magic, healings, kung fu, corpse reanimations, demons, and hot babes. Even the considerable wiles and devotion of the Savior's pal may not be enough to divert Joshua from his tragic destiny. But there's no one who loves Josh more -- except maybe "Maggie," Mary of Magdala -- and Biff isn't about to let his extraordinary pal suffer and ascend without a fight.
About the Author
Christopher Moore is the author of eighteen previous novels, including Razzmatazz, Shakespeare for Squirrels, Noir, Secondhand Souls, Sacré Bleu, Fool, and Lamb. He lives in San Francisco, California.
Product details
- Publisher : William Morrow Paperbacks; Reprint edition (May 25, 2004)
- Language : English
- Paperback : 444 pages
- ISBN-10 : 0380813815
- ISBN-13 : 978-0380813810
- Item Weight : 12.5 ounces
- Dimensions : 5.31 x 0.74 x 8 inches
- Best Sellers Rank: #9,688 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- #3 in Humorous American Literature
- #99 in Contemporary Literature & Fiction
- #122 in Humorous Fiction
- Customer Reviews:
About the author

Christopher Moore is the author of 15 previous novels: Practical Demonkeeping, Coyote Blue, Bloodsucking Fiends, Island of the Sequined Love Nun, The Lust Lizard of Melancholy Cove, Lamb, Fluke, The Stupidest Angel, A Dirty Job, You Suck, Fool, Bite Me, Sacré Bleu, The Serpent of Venice, and Secondhand Souls. He lives in San Francisco.
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Learn more how customers reviews work on AmazonCustomers say
Customers find the humor in the book very funny, entertaining, and witty. They describe the book as a great novel and good for musing. Readers also find the book insightful, fascinating, and inspirational. They praise the creativity as whimsical and imaginative. They describe the book is heartwarming and touching. Readers praise the writing style as well-written and addictive.
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Customers find the humor in the book very funny, subtle, and entertaining. They also say it's outlandishly witty and hilarious. Readers mention the book covers the origins of blond jokes and the initial reasons why Jewish people eat Chinese food. They say the adventure is fun as they meet various historical figures.
"...You absolutely have to read this book if you like Moore‘s books, love humor, want an alternative history about who Jesus was, enjoy reading about..." Read more
"This is a clever laugh-out-loud satire that skewers religion, power, and notions of masculinity...." Read more
"...Bible-believing person, but I still think its artistic, literary, entertainment, and certainly relationship-with-God value is enough to make me..." Read more
"...I love his humor. I grew up active in a Christian church and this was a funny, heartfelt take on the missing years...." Read more
Customers find the book great, delightful, and literary. They also say it's well-done and the author's style and narrative skills are sometimes pretty good.
"...Lamb is, to put it simply a masterpiece. It has the right balance of adventure, humor, serious topics, mystery, history...." Read more
"...The pair learn lots of interesting things - some of which become the basis for Christianity - and eventually find themselves coming back to Israel..." Read more
"...with as a Bible-believing person, but I still think its artistic, literary, entertainment, and certainly relationship-with-God value is enough to..." Read more
"...But on further examination, Biff's more than that. He's intelligent..." Read more
Customers find the book insightful, fascinating, and touching. They appreciate the good research on various topics, including Judaism. Readers also mention the concept is brilliant and the writing is funny.
"...All in all this is an interesting concept but I thought it had some problems so I only give this book four stars." Read more
"...Lamb was painstakingly researched; it's poignant and real; and, oh yeah...it's incredibly funny." Read more
"OK, so this isn't really the lost fifth gospel but it's still a fascinating (and sometimes uproariously funny) re-telling in hip American fashion of..." Read more
"...readers aren’t up in arms about this book is a testament to how unique, humorous, and entertaining it is...." Read more
Customers find the book whimsical, imaginative, and thoughtful. They describe it as one of the most creative, funny, poignant books they have ever read. Readers also mention the special addition print is pretty.
"...Biff is his complete opposite, he is crafty, cunning and doesn’t say no to a little trouble making...." Read more
"...Joshua(Jesus), for the most part, is the most lovable, perfect balance of God and man - you will be awed by the moments when the ways he is unlike..." Read more
"...What he has done quite successfully, is show a vivid imagination (he is all too happy to point out that this book is almost pure fiction) and a..." Read more
"...the end - and the world already knows how it ends - there's an example of beautiful, awful raw emotion from Biff, the narrator who just lost his..." Read more
Customers find the book heartwarming, poignant, and emotional. They say it brings a sense of humanness, is touching, and sympathetic. Readers also mention the beautiful story of friendship, loyalty, and suffering.
"...It was certainly worth seeing Jesus so human, so real, so near to us during his incarnation...." Read more
"...Lamb was painstakingly researched; it's poignant and real; and, oh yeah...it's incredibly funny." Read more
"...Lamb is simultaneously irreverent, off-the-wall and even parts serious...." Read more
"...Biff truly loves Josh; he is, in fact, a model of true friendship...." Read more
Customers find the writing style well-written, perfectly readable, and addictive. They also say the book is detailed and accurate.
"...It is also a very detailed read, and it is very obvious that the author put in many, many hours of research into biblical history and daily living..." Read more
"This is a perfectly readable book, and I did enjoy it...." Read more
"...and then completely outrageous the next with both being incredibly well written.Warning: if you are easily offended, this is not for you...." Read more
"...I gave this book five stars because it was funny, interesting, and well written and aside from the last little bit, the pacing was great...." Read more
Customers find the book full of spiritual insights presented through a raw comedy. They say it's true to the Bible's message and makes the gospel accessible. Readers also appreciate the true biblical and historical references that help give the story a real feel. Overall, they say the book makes their faith stronger.
"...Joshua(Jesus), for the most part, is the most lovable, perfect balance of God and man - you will be awed by the moments when the ways he is unlike..." Read more
"...didn't come to it with such concerns, but I found it incredibly respectful of all the religions he covered--even as he had a bit of fun with ritual..." Read more
"...Christopher Moore does a great job of not making this preachy or too religious to where those of us who are still a little put off by religion, can..." Read more
"...Before you start yawning, you need to know that the language is current and it is a very funny read...." Read more
Customers have mixed opinions about the plot complexity of the book. Some mention it's an epic adventure filled with heart, social commentary, and a combination of fact, fiction, and fantasy. However, others say the plot gets ridiculous at times, the same jokes are played over and over, and the adventure details are a bit far-fetched. They also say the central premise of the book is flawed and the ending seems rushed.
"...It has the right balance of adventure, humor, serious topics, mystery, history...." Read more
"...It was certainly worth seeing Jesus so human, so real, so near to us during his incarnation...." Read more
"...Magdalene deserves better. The plot gets ridiculous at times and the same jokes are played over and over..." Read more
"...up active in a Christian church and this was a funny, heartfelt take on the missing years...." Read more
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I’m not going too far if I say, Lamb by Christopher Moore is probably my most favourite book ever. I think it was recommended to me around 2009 – I remember bringing it with me to my first UK trip ever in 2010 and by that time I’ve read it at least once – and I instantly fell in love. In the past 10 years I’ve read it at least half a dozen times. And I still find it damn hilarious every time I decide to reread it. Though I’ve been mostly reading in English for the better part of the last 8 or so years, I think this is the first time that I read Lamb in that language. I have a well worn Hungarian paperback which I love to pieces – and which have a much better cover IMO – and a lot of memories dragging it halfway around the world. And since I have a pretty strong link with the Hungarian version, I was a bit afraid whether the enjoyment would be the same. Translations can be tricky and in recent years I’ve not been happy at how some books were translated into my language. I’m happy to report, that in this case our translator did a damn good job. The original version really lives up to my Hungarian memories.
Have you ever wondered who Jesus really was? About what happened to him during that 30 years the Bible doesn’t bother explaining? I can assure you, many scholars researched the topic, but probably none of them were as amusing as Christopher Moore‘s book. In Lamb we follow Jesus’ or rather Joshua’s life from the time he is six until his death. We watch him grow up, try his hands in miracles which later made him famous, learn how to be a Messiah. We follow him across half of the known world at the time until he returns to his home in Nasareth to be the man he was destined to be. But he wouldn’t be able to manage all that without his most trusted companion, Levi who is called Biff. Joshua – as he was called in Aramaic – , is depicted as a serious, emphatic, sensitive child who grows up into the man we more or less know from the Bible. Biff is his complete opposite, he is crafty, cunning and doesn’t say no to a little trouble making. But most of all, he is loyal to a fault.
“The Law says that two must go with the flock to keep an abomination from happening. I can spot an abomination from fifty paces.’ Maggie smiled. ‘And did you prevent any abominations?’ ‘Oh yes, I kept all of the abominations at bay while Kaliel played with his favorite sheep behind the bushes.’ ‘Biff,’ Joshua said gravely, ‘that was the abomination you were supposed to prevent.’”
They complement each other well, and in truth they are more brothers than friends. He also has a sense of humor which highlights the events all through the book. Because, when your best friend is the son of God, you have to suffer the companionship of the stupidest angel and you find yourself in impossible situations – like dealing with a yak, or getting your best friend out of a bag among other things), your only chance to stay sane is to develop a great sense of humor. And a healthy dose of common sense. The connection Josh and Biff have is really awesome and I have a soft spot for books which depict brotherhood such as theirs.
“Little Joshua spun on his heel. ‘My name is not Joshua bar Biff, and it is not Joshua bar Joseph either. It’s Joshua bar Jehovah!’ I looked around, hoping that no one had heard him. I didn’t want my only son (I planned to sell Judah and James into slavery) to be stoned to death for uttering the name of God in vain. ‘Don’t say that again, Josh. I won’t marry your mother.’ ‘No, you won’t.’ ‘I’m sorry.’ ‘I forgive you.’ ‘She will make an excellent concubine.’ Don’t let anyone tell you that the Prince of Peace never struck anyone. In those early days, before he had become who he would be, Joshua smote me in the nose more than once. That was the first time.”
As Joshua tries to figure out what it means to be Messiah and how can he become one, together they set off to find the three Magicans who visited Joshua upon his birth. Their adventure lead them to Balthasar in Kabul, Gaspar in China and Melchior in India. In all three places they learn about the teachings of famous philosophies and ideas which later shines through his teachings. Out of the three destinations they visited, my favorite was Kabul and Balthasar’s home with the seven Chinese concubines and the mysterious iron door. Gaspar and the monostor was a fun one too, where Joshua and Biff has to learn to ju-do. The parts about India, while were interesting, felt a bit rushed and we didn’t spend as much time there to be able to properly immerse ourselves in it.
“Rumi had expressed my sentiments exactly, but I would be damned if I was going to let my last words be ‘Eek, a tiger,’ so I listened quietly as urine filled my shoes.”
The last part of the book retells the story we know better from the Bible – how Joshua becomes the teacher people look up at, how he performs miracles and gets on the wrong side of the Sadducees and Pharisees. Even though you well damn know what is going to happen, you can’t help but sit on the edge of your seat as you read and feel ALL the emotions. I swear I have a lump in my throat every time I near the end.
“Since I could remember, my friendship with Joshua had been my anchor, my reason for being, my life; now it, he, was running toward destruction like a storm-driven ship to a reef, and I couldn’t think of a thing to do but panic.”
Lamb is, to put it simply a masterpiece. It has the right balance of adventure, humor, serious topics, mystery, history. I loved all the little Easter eggs Moore put into this book referring to historical events, people (a guy from Turin takes a cloth from Joshua after he cleans his face with it!!), etc. Not talking about how much research he must have put in to give back the atmosphere of the era, the traditions of Jews and the stories we know from the Bible. But thourough research and exquisite writing wouldn’t have been enough to have a near perfect book. What makes Lamb exceptional is the humor and the characters that Moore brought to life. No matter how many times I read it, I just can’t help laughing out loud or be sad or excited for them to succeed in their quest.
You absolutely have to read this book if you like Moore‘s books, love humor, want an alternative history about who Jesus was, enjoy reading about adventure, drama and prefer a character driven story. In short: READ THIS BOOK!
The story tells about the years of Jesus’ life that aren’t covered in the Gospels, from his childhood to his early 30s. We get an extended road trip (where the road is traveled on foot or camel) to India and China as Jesus and Biff search for knowledge from the three Wise Men. We learn why Chinese food became so popular on Christmas. Instead of calling the landmark the Great Wall of China, they feel the Ostentatious and Unpleasant Wall of China is a better name.
Moore treats Jesus’ last few days with great dignity while still showing a funny side. Biff gambles with the soldiers under the cross, waiting for him to die while struggling not to lose his temper, so he can remove Jesus’ body to safety for the resurrection. The grief and despair of the apostles and Jesus’ family is palpable.
This is one of my favorite funny books. It turns out that Moore himself is a Wise Man, too.
Some thing that all prospective readers of this book should realize is that not only is it fictional, but the author tells the story in a funny way and pokes fun at everyone from the Pharisees and Sadducees of that time, through the Jews and into everyone else. If you like sarcasm and cynicism then this book will really make you burst out laughing. If, on the other hand, you take your religion seriously - any religion, not just Christianity - then this book will verge on the blasphemous. Be forewarned about that before you pick it up.
Biff (nickname - his real name is Levi) and Joshua meet up when they are six years old or thereabouts and immediately become friends. Within a couple of years, Mary of Magdala moves into the neighborhood and the three become inseparable. Mary has a huge crush and love for Joshua, but he is not willing to be with any woman. Biff on the other hand has no such compunctions and never hesitates to find a way to spend nights with women of any kind. The story of Jesus's first thirty years is told by Biff and it follows the pair as they try to figure out how Joshua will become the messiah. This trail takes them through most of Asia and many years and introduces us to the three magi in somewhat different incarnations. The pair learn lots of interesting things - some of which become the basis for Christianity - and eventually find themselves coming back to Israel for Joshua to start his preaching. The end of the story is not unusual but there are several twists there that you might not expect.
In the beginning I thought the book was very funny but the sarcasm eventually wore me down and I was not that thrilled with the way the book proceeded. I think the turning point was where Biff and Joshua encounter the Indian Untouchable cast and the author describes in minute detail how horrible their lives are. I did not find anything funny in their plight and the rest of the book simply wilted away. Another things that started out clever, but quickly became irritating is that Biff and Joshua speak to each other in a modern American Idiom - how likely is that? Since Biff has been dead for over two thousand years, the author has an angel come to earth to resurrect Biff so he can write his story down. Why is it that it is now important to do so is never explained.
All in all this is an interesting concept but I thought it had some problems so I only give this book four stars.
Top reviews from other countries
Levi is tasked with writing the gospel because he and Jesus (Joshua) were childhood friends. They travelled together through Asia seeking out the three wise men and remained close until Jesus’s crucifixion and subsequent resurrection.
Raziel takes Levi to a hotel in Missouri, USA, to write the gospel. Raziel watches TV, while Levi writes. Through Levi’s eyes, Moore tells the story of the missing years, checking in occasionally on Raziel and Levi in their shared room.
I enjoyed Moore’s ‘A Dirty Job’ last year and wanted to read something else from his back catalogue. ‘Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal’ was very warmly received by the Goodreads community, so I downloaded it to my Kindle.
I enjoyed ‘Lamb’ even more than ‘A Dirty Job’. Clearly, a lot of work had gone into researching the background for the story, and the humour was plentiful. Moore engaged me and made me smile throughout the book and, at several junctures, had me laughing out loud. Hugely entertaining!




