This is the single most impactful book I have EVER read. Truthfully.
While I had heard people talk about the book here and there the past few years, I was never motivated to read it. Probably because I was just tired of all the 'trying'.
I'd tried everything I could imagine to attempt to feel better. And I probably spent more than $10,000 and a thousand hours (or more) on counseling, personal development, meditation stuff, medications (the few times I tried them), spiritual exploration... ANYTHING that would help to alleviate, even just a bit, the pain and depression I had experienced for decades.
And NOTHING has helped me as much as the simple message and instruction in this book: knowing that my entire life can change the moment I choose to love myself.
And now, today, I am SO THANKFUL - like, EVERY second of every day - that I did finally read it.
I won't preach or give full list/history of my past... just know that I've lived with severe bipolar, suicidal depression, and off-the-charts ADHD for nearly two decades, none of which I could, or wanted to, take medication for. Much of which, I'm sure, was caused by growing up in about the worst home environment you can imagine; the worst kinds of stuff.
I write all of this simply to say: that if you're low - like SO LOW, like you're in the the VERY, VERY dark, caving-in, hell-ish pit that makes dying appear a real, and perhaps, better, option to living)... I've been there.
And my heart goes out to you. I have so much compassion and appreciation for what you're experiencing. Just hope - not even believe, not know - just have the slightest bit of hope that life can get better. That is ALL you need to begin. And then... read this book and apply its' single lesson:
*** Love yourself, right now, for whatever you're feeling, thinking or experiencing. Just love yourself.
I have been reading, and re-reading it for 10 minutes - EVERY SINGLE DAY - for over 6 months.
MORE IMPORTANTLY, I have been applying - MANY, MANY times - the actual practice, and experience of, loving myself.
It is so powerful, yet simple and loving.
And if you get beyond the words and 'mind-stuff', and just practice loving yourself - for WHO YOU ARE, AND WHAT YOU'RE FEELING/THINKING, IN THAT MOMENT - without judging it, or trying to change it...
Just acknowledging what you're experiencing, and loving yourself anyway...
*** You can change in an instant.
Now, I will add that I found this book at the END of a very long and very dedicated spiritual, mental and emotional journey. I found this book 5 years after really committing to self-awareness and spirituality, and have been practicing daily meditation since 2010. The concepts, and practice/ability, of mindfulness, and being present, are ingrained. So I was definitely 'primed' for the material.
But... had I found this book first, and read a review like this one, and held out just the tiniest bit of hope that what the reviewer wrote might be possible for me, who knows how quickly I might have evolved?
So... if you simply read the book with no judgments, or expectations of yourself... just read it, and MORE IMPORTANTLY, just love yourself - many times daily - for HOWEVER you're feeling in THAT moment, it can change your life. AND THEN... everything else in your life can get easier and more creative/new opportunities.
I'm amazed, humbled, and SO VERY GRATEFUL for the evolution I've been blessed to experience. Really, it's unbelievable to me coming from my mindset and place in life only a few short years ago.
And while my life isn't perfect, I still have challenges with the mood 'stuff', and there are relationships and situations I definitely hope to improve...
I honestly cannot believe how much better life is because of loving myself every day, many times a day. It truly is unbelievable. It's like a love, a sense of peace, and a 'knowing-ness' that everything is 'all right', that I've never known.
And that's my hope for you.
Good luck!!!
Thomas
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Funny fact: I'm now onto my 6th different color of pen/highlighter for the book! That's a record... never used more than 3 before, usually only one or two. So... my pages really do look like a Christmas tree!
This is the first time I've ever went so deep into one book and continually reading and re-reading it. And I made it my pact that this is the only 'personal development' book I'm going through this year. I have a bookshelf FULL of a lot of (probably) good books. But, if I even read them, I quickly went through them and then was looking for the 'next big thing'.
This time... I'm stopping my mind and it's tricks and desire for 'new' and 'better'. So... I'm going slower, and deeper. Narrowing focus. Deepening understanding. And it's making all the difference.
++++++++++++++++ UPDATE March 11, 2017+++++++++++++++++
Hi again. I'm not a huge review writer, let alone updater. But, I SURE appreciate it when I read a review by someone who then comes back months or years later to update it. And an acquaintance said they'd just read "Learning to Love Yourself", and it reminded me to get back here!
I'm still practicing this simply message daily. Many, many times per day. It wraps around all the other 'stuff' I do; and is my constant companion. Not much else I can add to my review... other than that now, nearly three years into the doing/practice, I don't even recognize the person I was. Well I do, yet with kind eyes, gentleness and compassion. SO MUCH pain and fear then... which is why I sought out the book.
* Learning to Love myself has been the single most powerful thing I've done to heal my past, my perceived limitations/beliefs and realize my true, authentic self.
* Even more amazing, is the more I've loved myself, THE MORE I honor, accept and love others.
* I've grown much softer, kinder eyes when looking at others... and it might just be the best feeling I've ever had. Just letting go of the judgments (I was SOOOOOOOO judgmental, critical, etc... all the internalized shame stuff) and accepting everyone as they are.
* Knowing, truly knowing, that we're all equals; that we're all JUST people. That every person is someone's son or daughter; someone's baby boy or baby girl.
That mindset is what this book has led me to. And, I'm forever and humbly grateful. Thank you Dr. Hendricks.
And good luck to each of you. Remember, you're worth it. We all are. :)
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