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Lies and the Lying Liars Who Tell Them Hardcover – Import, August 29, 2003
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Purchase options and add-ons
- Print length368 pages
- LanguageEnglish
- PublisherDutton
- Publication dateAugust 29, 2003
- Dimensions6.75 x 1.5 x 9 inches
- ISBN-100141886889
- ISBN-13978-0141886886
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Review
Knowledgeable and funny . . . [A] tough-minded look at politicians and the press. -- San Francisco Examiner
Wickedly funny. -- Newsweek
About the Author
Excerpt. © Reprinted by permission. All rights reserved.
God chose me to write this book.
Just the fact that you are reading this is proof not just of Gods existence, but also of His/Her/Its beneficence. Thats right. I am not certain of Gods precise gender. But I am certain that He/She/It chose me to write this book.
This isnt hubris. Im not saying this in an egotistical way. God didnt choose me because Im the greatest writer who ever lived. That was William Shakespeare, whose work I have a passing familiarity with. No. I just happened to be the right vessel at the right time. If something in this book makes you laugh, it was Gods joke. If something makes you think, its because God had a good point to make.
The reason I know God chose me is because God spoke to me personally.
God began our conversation by clearing something up. Some of George W. Bushs friends say that Bush believes God called him to be president during these times of trial. But God told me that He/She/It had actually chosen Al Gore by making sure that Gore won the popular vote and, God thought, the electoral college. "THAT WORKED FOR EVERYONE ELSE," God said.
"What about Tilden?" I asked, referring to the 1876 debacle.
"QUIET!" God snapped. God was angry.
God said that after 9/11, George W. Bush squandered a unique moment of national unity. That instead of rallying the country around a program of mutual purpose and sacrifice, Bush cynically used the tragedy to solidify his political power and pursue an agenda that panders to his base and serves the interests of his corporate backers.
God told me that Bush squandered a $4.6 trillion surplus and is plunging us into deficits as far as God can see. And that Bush squandered another surplus. The surplus of goodwill from the rest of the world that he had inherited from Bill Clinton.
And this was pissing God off.
He/She/It was right. But it sounded like a lot of work.
"Look, God, Im flattered, but I think you got the wrong guy. The kind of book youre talking about would require months of research."
And God said, "LET THERE BE GOOGLE. AND LET THERE BE LEXISNEXIS."
"Very funny, God. I use Google all the time."
"YES, I KNOW," God said. "FOR HOT ASIAN TEENS."
"You must be thinking of my son, Joe."
"AL? I'M OMNISCIENT."
"Okay, okay." I changed the subject. "Its just that I cant do this book myself."
"LEAVE THAT TO ME," God boomed.
And thats when Harvard called.
***
Harvards Kennedy School of Government asked me to serve as a fellow at its Shorenstein Center on the Press, Politics, and Public Policy. After my varied and celebrated career in television, movies, publishing, and the lucrative world of corporate speaking, being a fellow at Harvard seemed, frankly, like a step down.
I couldnt think of anything less appealing than molding the minds of tomorrows leaders, unless it was spending fireside evenings sipping sherry with great minds at the Faculty Club. Yawn.
To my surprise and delight, though, all Harvard wanted me to do was show up every once in a while and write something about something. That gave me an idea.
"Would it be okay if I wrote a scathingly partisan attack on the rightwing media and the Bush administration?"
"No problem," Harvard said absentmindedly.
"Count me in," I replied. "From now on call me Professor Franken."
"No," Harvard said, "youre not a professor. But you can run a study group on the topic of your choosing."
"Great," I said. "Ive got the perfect topic: Write My Sons Harvard College Application Essay."
"No," they said. "Harvard students already know how to write successful Harvard applications, Al. We want you to teach them something new."
Harvard was right where I wanted it. "How about if the topic is: How to Research My Book?"
"Sure," Harvard said. "Most of our professors teach that course. Why, in the Biochemistry department, most of the graduate level courses are- "
Harvard was boring me. "I gotta run, Harvard. Thanks."
***
I had my Nexis, I had my Google, I had my Harvard fellowship, and I had my fourteen research assistants. I sat down to write. Nothing.
So I got on my knees and prayed for guidance. "How, God, can I best do Your work through this book? Who, dear Lord, is the audience for a book like this? And whats a good title?"
God answered, "YOU KNOW THOSE SHITTY BOOKS BY ANN COULTER AND BERNIE GOLDBERG?"
"The best-sellers that claim theres a liberal bias in the media?" I asked.
"TOTAL BULLSHIT," God said. "START BY ATTACKING THEM. HE'S CLEARLY A DISGRUNTLED FORMER EMPLOYEE, AND SHE JUST LIES. BY THE WAY, THERE'S SOMETHING SERIOUSLY WRONG WITH HER."
"Thats pretty obvious."
"SO GO AFTER THEM, THE WHOLE LIBERAL BIAS MYTH, AND THEN GO AFTER THE RIGHT-WING MEDIA. ESPECIALLY FOX."
"Okay, God, Im writing this down."
"THEN USE THEM AS A JUMPING-OFF POINT TO GO AFTER BUSH. YOU KNOW, BIG TAX CUTS FOR THE RICH, SURGING UNEMPLOYMENT, IGNORING EVERYONE BUT HIS CORPORATE BUDDIES, SCREWING THE ENVIRONMENT, PISSING OFF THE REST OF THE WORLD. THAT STUFF. AND THAT'S YOUR BOOK."
"Got it. One last thing. Title."
"HOW ABOUT BEARERS OF FALSE WITNESS AND THE FALSE WITNESS THAT THEY BEAR?"
"Hmm. I, uh, Ill work with that."
Reprinted from Lies: And the Lying Liars Who Tell Them-A Fair and Balanced Look at the Right by Al Franken by permission of Dutton, a member of Penguin Group (USA) Inc. Copyright © Al Franken, Inc., 2003. All rights reserved. This excerpt, or any parts thereof, may not be reproduced without permission.
Product details
- ASIN : 0525947647
- Publisher : Dutton (August 29, 2003)
- Language : English
- Hardcover : 368 pages
- ISBN-10 : 0141886889
- ISBN-13 : 978-0141886886
- Item Weight : 1.5 pounds
- Dimensions : 6.75 x 1.5 x 9 inches
- Best Sellers Rank: #256,886 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- #87 in Political Humor (Books)
- #735 in U.S. Political Science
- #10,181 in Literary Fiction (Books)
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About the author

Senator Al Franken has represented Minnesota in the United States Senate since 2009. Before entering politics, he was an award-winning comedy writer, author, and radio talk show host. He's been married to his wife, Franni, for 41 years — many of them happy. They have two children, Thomasin and Joe, and three grandchildren. Senator Franken graduated from Harvard College and received his doctorate in right-wing megalomania studies from Trump University.
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Anyone can write a piece full of scorn and ridicule, needless to say. To be worthwhile, though, it has to include other things. Like, for instance, relevant facts, accurate analysis, a coherent point of view, even wit. Let's not get into who's got the monopoly on those elements in the current firefight between the left and right; Franken's got them all to at least some degree, which should be enough for anyone willing to plonk down twenty-five bucks (or fourteen and change on Amazon). What, though, if anything, makes this a genuinely good book?
The answer to that, unsurprisingly, has a lot to do with Al Franken himself. On the evidence of "Lies", he's very smart, very angry, and very good at his job, but he's not so arrogant that he thinks he can face down the right on his own. So, before writing this book, he went and got himself a group of graduate students to do research for him. His first clever move was naming this bunch "Team Franken", like it was a professional staff at some cable network with too much money in its digital effects budget. His second clever move was pointing out that all Team Franken had to do to disprove many right-wing claims was run a few Google searches.
With that kind of start, I was all set for Lies to turn into the story of Al and Team Franken running around looking for some challenge, some really subtle and dangerous right-wing lie that would require all of their might to debunk, and not finding it because all the right-wing claims are so blatantly false. That would have been a terrific book. This, however, is not that book, and again the reason for it has to do with Franken himself. Very smart, very angry, very good at his job, he attacks everything about the right that he can't stand, applying dozens of styles and strategies, and winds up with a good collection of essays instead of a great cohesive work.
In "Lies", Al Franken has two main targets � the right-wing "news" of Matt Drudge, Fox News and others, and the George W. Bush administration � and that right there divides his book in a way he can't quite spackle over. Then too, he has enough ability to pull him in several directions, such as straight reportage, prose satire, legitimate and political theater, and even comics, which further blurs his focus. The individual chapters of "Lies" entertain and instruct quite well, sometimes brilliantly, but the whole thing never gels into anything more than the sum of its considerable parts.
This is a pity, because Franken actually has an important point to make. He's savvy enough to spell it out: "Part of [the right-wing media's] entertainment value comes from their willingness to lie and distort�Our added entertainment value will have to come from being funny and attractive. And passionate. And idealistic. But also smart." That, it seems clear, is the central thrust of his whole effort. Unfortunately, the statement is on page 353, after a tasty but amorphous goulash of ideas about everything from Bill O'Reilly's emotional fragility to Sean Hannity's statistical fudging to Ann Coulter's rhetorical tricks. And then to the story of what might have happened if the right-wing hawks Bush, Cheney, Thomas, Limbaugh, Will and others had served in Vietnam, and then something called Supply Side Jesus, who wears a gold-trimmed robe and a pedicure�
There's certainly nothing wrong with a good collection of satirical political essays, but "Lies" could have been a great deal more than that. Based on that statement about entertainment value, I suspect Franken intended his book to be the opening shot in a left-wing counterattack against the right's demonizations over the past few years. In fact, it almost is that shot. He may very well get it just right next time, especially with all the free publicity he's been receiving lately.
I note, by the way, that Fox News has recently announced that its withdrawal of the copyright-infringement lawsuit against Franken will allow him to sink back into the obscurity from whence he came. Now, let's see; Fox News brought suit against Al Franken because he wasn't supposed to use the phrase "fair and balanced" in the title of this book, they splashed it all over every newspaper, political website and blog in the country, they got slapped down hard, and now they're talking like the whole thing was a publicity coup by Al Franken. He should have a field day with that one.
Benshlomo says, Laugh at your enemies; it will drive them crazy.
I listen to alot of right wing radio, what choice do I have - the alternative is bland music or all day sport. I read quite alot and I have read AL Franken's latest book. Not great literature, not great comedy (quite funny)- but very interesting. The funniest line was the last line.
When I read a book like this - I want to make sure that that the extremely serious accusations are correct. So I decide to do some research. If I want to find about about a movie I go to Rotten Tomatoes. For a book what better than than Amazon and the 1100 reviews to date.
Since I am looking for faults in the book - I focus on reviews that give it one or two stars. It is these people that will determine whether this book is accurate or not. Remember, this is a top selling book which is accusing the President of the USA of being a lyar!!!
I will now list the typical one star rebuttals with my comments were appropriate:
1) "Unsubstantiated" - May be but give me an example!
2) "His arguments can be dismantled in Five minutes" I'm listening
3)"Liberals will follow the fate of James Dean...." Is this a threat or a pagan vision?
4) "He must be a Frenchman" In your dreams (Since French people have 4-6 weeks vacation a year, enjoy long lunches with excellent wine, can wander through streets with beautiful architecture, have affordable health care, job security and very little poverty. His American counterpart is lucky to get 2 weeks vacation, works like a dog, eats processed meat from factory farms without proper hygene and worker safety/benefits, and were there a good chance he lives below the poverty level having had a comparatively poor education, and his future probably means he will lose his manufacturing job in exchange for a job at K-Mart)
5)"Liberalism is basically Secularism". No comment
6)"8 months prior to Sept 11, is the Clinton adminstration Duh !!!" Three people thought that was good review.
7) "I have not read this book..." 8 out 77 thought that was good review.
8) " If he wanted to prove his case he should challenge them directly" This book is a direct challenge. I am looking for factual rebuttals.
9) "He should get a job" This is too deep for me.
So the critics have had their say. The above list is merely a representative sample. So far all responses have been vacuous.
Thus the conclusion that Bush (and his cronies) is a lyar. During the election campaign I had come to the conclusion that if you had to wade through Bush's deepest thoughts you would not even get your ankles wet. But it is obvioulsly worse than that. He has made huge lies regarding the miltary, his tax policy and Iraq. His every statement regarding the environment is a gaping deception. I'm not particuarly religious, but if you plan on getting votes by aligning yourself with God, you had dam well better be virtuous. Understanding the Gospel according to Luke also might help.
Many people who are upset by this callous, hypocritical administartion are accused of a lack of patriotism. Well it is not patriotic to destroy the land air and water that we breath. It is not patriotic to increase poverty or to execute innocent people or execute people who merely get legal aid. It is not patriotic a launch a war having decieved the electorate, it is not patriotic to use religion to get votes, use religion to destroy Science and Logic, to use religion to carry out a pagan foreign policy. It is not patriotic to treat the rest of the world with contempt, to help fund the educational infrastructure that breeds people who dream of destroying America. It is not patriotic to lie. No that is not patriotism. but it does threaten the longterm security of me, my family and all who want a happy healthy and prosperous longterm future.
Ignorance may be bliss - but it is also highly dangerous.
Bush's crimes listed in this book are worse than Clintons (i.e the politically inspired investigation into his private life, that paralized the country for a year and led to issues that should reside between husband and wife, not a with a bunch of adulterous political enemies) or Nixons relatively minor crime.
With hindsight and without the promised ('we know where they are')weapons of mass destruction, the war on Iraq was obviously illegal. Impeachment should be in the air.
Top reviews from other countries
I'm not ashamed to admit that I never heard of the guy before but I did hear that he had the audacity to challenge Anne Coulter (the screaming right-wing conspiracy theorist who crops up on CNN opinion shows every so often to shout about Bill Clinton) so his books was something I was willing to read.
So I bought the book. I must admit I was initialy dismayed by the title and the title of his other books (Lies and the lying liers who tell them and Rush Limbaugh is a big fat idiot), however I came to learn that this was merely all part of Franken's satirical art.
So what does Franken do? He goes on the attack against several Right Wing figures mostly belonging to the Republican party. He insults them, he goads them, he most certainñy doesn't show them any respect. Essentially he uses the techniques he criticises the same right-wingers for using with one essential difference - he leaves out the lies.
He embarks on what we might call a scholarly fact-finding mission to challenge conservatives like Coulter and Limbaugh in the same manner someone like Norman Finkelstein has done in the past. However, Franken's unique style is replete with humour and irreverence and, even when he's being utterly offensive, it's impossible not to like him.
He essentially focuses on a group of republicans in this book, beginning with Anne Coulter and following on with Bernie Goldberg, Bill O'Reilly, the Fox Network and its correspondents, Sean Hannity and his liberal sidekick Colmes and also the methods they use in attacking the Democrats as well as a mysterious "liberal" group they have created to pin everything from faulty computers to cancer on.
He makes some witty observations about the personal lives of his victims and breaks the monotony of politicking every so often with a comic-style section. My favourite part of the book was, in fact, "The Gospel of Supply Side Jesus". It literally had me rolling on my bed laughing my head off. He points out several of the lies which have been made on behalf of the right wing, including claims made by President George Bush concerning his compaign. He also pounces on the cynical exploitation of September 11 by the Right Wing in an attempt to silence opposition.
What I don't like about his writing, however, are his constant damned attempts to plug his own books. It seems that he mentiones "Rush Limbaugh is a Big Fat Idiot" every 10 pages and, I must admit, it's worked a treat because I've just ordered the book but I hate anything with so much product placement in it.
I think he's also sometimes a bit off target with his criticism, especially with his attacks on critics of the so-called 'Death Tax'. He has a fair point but contradicts himself with his analogies concerning this topic and seems to go a bit over the top.
Interested in the politics of America? Then I think this book would be a useful start. You don't really need too much background info to have great fun and understanding of the book. Anything that takes the mickey out of Bob Jones University and Queen Barbera Bush wins my vote!
If you ignore the warning signs, what do you expect is going to happen?
Given all of this why only three stars? If this was the printed edition (which I bought many years ago) I'd rate it as five stars. However I bought the Kindle edition and it is a very poor transfer. The font keeps changing, it is sometimes unclear what is Franken and what is the words of others being quoted by him. Worst of all however, there are no tables or graphics, this is unforgivable as key sections of the book depend on tables of figures. This is not the sort of 49p Kindle edition where I'd let a few errors pass based on the overall value, at this price it is simply not acceptable that the Kindle transfer is so bad.
So we have a wonderful book ruined by a rubbish transfer. I'd recommend the printed version 100% and give 5* but not this Kindle version. I'll give 3* as it is still a good read but nothing like as good as it should be thanks to a rubbish transfer.










