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Lies Women Believe: And the Truth that Sets Them Free Paperback – January 1, 2006
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T.W. © AudioFile Portland, Maine
Nancy Leigh DeMoss, who is one of the most articulate Bible expositors in the Christian world today, has written a book that I hope will get to the top of the best-seller list. It exposes the lies that imprison so many women and sets them free. I highly recommend it.
The woman of today is bombarded and confused by so many falsehoods. These messages may originate from painful childhood experiences or from media that emphasize beauty and glitz above all else. Or perhaps from a culture that tells women their role as a wife and mother doesn't count nearly as much as a career. Or the more selfish trend is that if her marriage doesn't make her happy, she owes it to herself to bail out. In Lies Women Believe: And the Truth that Sets Them Free Nancy Leigh DeMoss exposes Satan as the source of these falsehoods and points women back to the truth only found in God's Word. Whatever problem today's women may face--guilt, addictions, an unhappy marriage, desire for career over mothering children, troubled children, the list goes on--she reminds us that there is an answer, and it is found in God. God is enough.
-Tim and Beverly LaHaye
For a quarter of a century, Nancy Leigh DeMoss has listened compassionately to heart-wrenching stories about the ways women in today's world are looking for meaning in life in all the wrong places. Readers will find themselves in these stories. A careful reading of this compelling book, written by someone who knows and loves the Scriptures, will help women identify and break out of the many bondages--emotional, physical, and spiritual--that trap them. It will also lead women to a new vision for their lives, and the profound sense of freedom that comes with the knowledge of God's redeeming love made known in Jesus Christ. Nancy's breathtaking book arrives on the American scene at a timely moment in history, when the populace is confused, desperately searching for meaning in life, and buying into anything that brings immediate gratification. This liberating book will be a blessing to you."
-George and Kingsley Gallup
What a timely, God-initiated and God-endorsed book! Nancy is a friend not only to us and to our family, but to thousands who have heard her speak and have known her personally. This is a most timely and crucial contribution to all women. Nancy deals honestly with the most pressing pain in women's lives and shows sensitively real illustrations and the truth that sets them free. Without hesitation, we encourage every woman to carefully study and apply this wonderful and practical spiritual help--both hurting and bewildered women, as well as radiant and happy women who desire to help others.
-Henry and Marilyn Blackaby
Have you ever wished you had a trusted friend, a wise counselor, that you could go to for godly, profoundly biblical advice? Someone you could go to who would help you tackle life's thorniest questions? Nancy Leigh DeMoss may not be your closest friend, but she will provide you with the solid Psalm 1 counsel that your soul longs for. On more than one occasion we've sought Nancy's advice and counsel. She is a godly woman with a heart for God's people. Compassionate and caring, I think you'll find that Nancy will stimulate you to love and good deeds in these pages. Buy two of these books--one for yourself and one for your best friend!
-Dennis and Barbara Rainey
Finally we can stop walking around in a maze of unanswered questions. The 'why's' have been silenced and the truth proclaimed! Nancy penetrates the confusion of our day and helps us see through the deception that has plunged so many women into despair and frustration. Then she gently leads us into the truth that is the only pathway to experience God's beautiful peace and restoration.
-P. Bunny Wilson
Today's women need to hear the truth, and I praise God for Nancy Leigh Demoss' incredible faith in His truth and her honesty about our weakness. She refuses to compromise His Word for the world's sake.
-Heather Whitestone McCallum, Miss America 1995
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We recently made a major move and are going through the challenging task of finding a church community. We visited a church today that we thought we might like. I prowled their web-site only to discover that one of their women's book clubs is reading Lies Women Believe. If this book represents the church's position on women, we have not found "home."
Let me start off by saying this book has some sound advice, but for me those things are overshadowed by what I would call her more "legalistic" views.
Despite her comparing Eve's sin to overeating (page 56) and suggesting that this was her sin I thought the book started off well. Then she begins to speak and give her opinion on things that I thought were a little over the top.
In one place it seemed as though she was telling the women that if they don't always look their best it's their fault if their husband's eyes wander or if he cheats. In another it sounded like she was saying women should be willing to have many children or risk their salvation, and in another she basically said women should stay in an abusive marriage and wait for God to change their husbands.
Here are some of the quotes from the book that gave me some concern-
Page 80: If a wife dresses in a way that is slovenly and unkempt, if she does not take any care for her physical appearance, she reflects negatively on her husband (and on her heavenly Bridegroom). Further, if she makes no effort to be physically attractive for her husband, you may be sure another woman out there will be standing in line to get his attention.
Page 171 - In the Apostle Paul's first epistle to Timothy, we are reminded that childbearing is a basic, God-given role for women. Paul exhorts younger widows to "marry, to have children, to manage their homes and to give them enemy no opportunity for slander" (1 Timothy 5:14). In the last verse of chapter, 2, he states, "women will be saved through childbearing - if they continue in faith, love and holiness with propriety."
Likewise, a woman's willingness to embrace, rather than shun, her God-given role and calling (childbearing) is a necessary fruit that will accompany genuine salvation - it is proof that she belongs to Him and follows His ways.
Page 149 - There are extreme situations where an obedient wife may need to remove herself and /or children from proximity to her husband if the remain in that setting would be to place themselves in physical danger. However, even in such a case, a woman can - and must - maintain an attitude of reverence for her husband's position; her goal is not to belittle or resist him as her husband but, ultimately, to see God restore him to obedience.
If she provokes or worsens the situation through her attitudes, words, or behavior, she will interfere with what God wants to do in her husband's life and will not be free to claim God's protection and intervention on her behalf.
Given her references to her past about not having Barbie dolls and growing up with little to no exposure to the world around her I can see why she would have some of the views she does. Which is probably why she suggests we limit our children's access to certain media, and that part of our children's problem is that they know more about the world than they do about Jesus.
I can agree with her on this point, many of our youth know more about the latest boy band, fads or movies then they know about Jesus and the gospel. It's so important for us to teach them to ways of God, to pray, read the His Word and to always seek the guidance of the Holy Spirit.
But what I can't necessarily agree with is the "lie" she uses on page 182 that says "We are not responsible for how our children turn out."
Even though my parents didn't take me and my siblings to church very often I can't blame them for the things I've done. I spent many years in the Mormon cult worshiping a false god, and believing I was bound for heaven when I was on my way to hell. Was this their fault or mine?
Yes, I believe it's up to us to teach our children the gospel and about Jesus Christ, but at some point it's up to them to accept or reject what we've taught. And at some point it's up to the individual to put on their big girl or boy pants and accept some of the responsibility for their sinful behavior. It's way too easy to put the blame squarely on their parents.
As I conclude my review I want to reiterate that while I did find some valuable advice and insight in the book I also found myself feeling more discouraged than encouraged as I read it. I suggest that when you read her book take everything she says with a grain of salt even though you may feel like throwing the book against the wall or tossing it into the recycle bin like I did. And always pray and compare what she says to the Word of God.
Thank you for reading this review. :)
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