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Little Girls Can Be Mean: Four Steps to Bully-proof Girls in the Early Grades Paperback – August 17, 2010
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“More than ever, young girls are facing painful social challenges that require real skills to respond…offers useful strategies and tools to help parents empower their daughters from the earliest ages.” ―Rachel Simmons, bestselling author of Odd Girl Out and The Curse of the Good Girl
“A valuable guide for understanding and demystifying the friendship issues, social cruelty, and bullying of elementary-aged girls. A must-have book for parents, counselors, and educators.” ―Rosalind Wiseman, bestselling author of Queen Bees and Wannabes
“From clinical studies to mainstream media, the problem of girl aggression has been the subject of growing concern, but most of the recent focus has been on middle- and high-school students, not on elementary-school girls. That's part of the problem, argue the authors of this reassuring guide, which offers practical tips and personal anecdotes aimed at alleviating female "relational aggression" in the critical early grades. In each chapter, the authors, both developmental psychologists, illustrate how adults can guide girls through a four-step process to identify and deal with tough social situations. Throughout, boxed activities for educators, parents, and girls themselves give the tide a highly interactive, proactive feel, and an appended section suggests ways that adults can apply the same techniques to their own lives. More than just invaluable advice about preparing girls to cope with bullying, gossip, and friendship riffs, these are empowering strategies for adults to communicate and connect with their daughters while they are at a highly receptive age and to help them develop resilient self-esteem before they hit the middle-school jungle.” ―Booklist
Top Customer Reviews
FINALLY there's a guide that does it all: gives parents a simple easy plan to support girls' friendship fights while at the same time gives them the tools to help manage social cruelty! Even better, integrated throughout are Teacher Tips and Tips for Girls with ideas and activities to reach girls in grades K-6. The flow of the book is anecdotal, very readable, and non-alarmist.
In fact, it will help you finally understand why girls act the way they do, and know what to do about it. This book is for anyone who works with or cares about girls from ages 5-12. It's become the first book I recommend to parents in my clinical practice with elementary aged girls. I love it!
The book seems to be all about "standing up to your friend who can be a bully" without defining what "bully" really is. I see certain amount of friction that kids go through as necessary part of learning and growing as long the friction is short term, and the child is not always the victim. But, I got the feeling that the authors didn't think so. They seem to think that all social struggles deserved close adult attention and how all these social struggles have lasting effects to girls.
The anecdotes in the book was realistic and typical of elementary age girls, but there wasn't much useful information for me on how to deal with it.
As the mother of a 6yo girl, I have been witness to "mean girls" for a number of years already. No doubt there will be many more years of it to come....
Prior to reading this book, I would have told my daughter to "not play with mean girls" or "tell the teacher" if someone bullies you. I realise now this was not such helpful advice.
Instead I take the time to discuss what's specifically happening, ask her how she feels about such events, and what she thinks she can do differently in the future.
I am convinced this ongoing dialogue and role play, will reassure her that I am genuinely listening and "on her side" and also equip her with techniques and coping strategies for difficult situations.
I highly recommend this book to parents and caregivers of girls wanting an insight into what's going on, why, and how to deal with it. A necessary addition to your parenting book collection....
They have several good points and suggestions in this book for a variety of scenarios, but the main thing I got out of it was a technique for listening and letting your child know you're hearing them in order to help them feel safe to make wise choices, rather than trying to fix problems for them and/or simply telling them what to do.
There. Now you know too and don't have to buy the book :)
Most Recent Customer Reviews
Hi, Did not like the book at all. Say your money, not worth the read! Thank you. Judy B.Published 3 months ago by D. E. Bartlett
Should be required reading for any parent of girls in Kindergarten to 6th Grade.Published 6 months ago by Dana Douglas
Great for parents wanting to walk their daughters through growing up!Published 10 months ago by audiwaldo
Perfect for me to help my sensitive daughter. Giving her tools so that she doesn't come home with a belly ache when the enviable dynamics of changing friendships evolve. Read morePublished 13 months ago by Amazon Customer