- Paperback: 338 pages
- Publisher: American Psychological Association (APA); 1 edition (January 1, 2006)
- Language: English
- ISBN-10: 1433804301
- ISBN-13: 978-1433804304
- Product Dimensions: 9.8 x 6.9 x 0.7 inches
- Shipping Weight: 1.2 pounds
- Average Customer Review: 4.8 out of 5 stars See all reviews (10 customer reviews)
- Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,739,238 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
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Sex and Love in Intimate Relationships 1st Edition
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Top Customer Reviews
This book provides an important answer to the great mystery concerning sexuality in America: why is that despite a tidal wave of Dr. Phil-type experts and Mars and Venus books, Americans seem to be having less and less sex?
Sex and Love in Intimate Relationships reports, for example, that a 1994 survey of 7000 couples reported that 59% of men and 63% of women said they were not emotionally satisfied in their sexual relationships. Other surveys indicate that most couples, particularly as people get older, have sex just once or twice a month. Why do people have sex so infrequently, despite the growing mountain of books, video tapes and workshops promising new vistas of sexual adventure and ecstasy?
The answer, if one believes Sex and Love in Intimate Relationships, is that most our real sexual problems derive fgrom deep inner psychological defenses that are untouched by the superficial focus on technique offered by most sex experts. It is fine to prescribe telling your partner what you like, wearing pink nighties or making love in a phone booth. But unless we dare tackle the deep inner causes of sexual dissatisfaction, such outer prescriptions rarely offering lasting results.Read more ›
There are a lot of case studies documented as well. While the book is quite easy to read and understand, the case studies help give the principles expoused a more personal flavor. They help the reader better understand the concepts they are reading and how they can better utitlize them in their own life. The case studies also allow the reader to see their own triggers and circumstances in the lives of others. I really like that! Readers immediately see themselves and that they are not alone. They see that someone else, and in some cases many others, have went through similar experiences and have had similar reactions.
For anyone looking to expand their sexual pleasure and the ability to love and be loved, I highly recommend this book. Not only will it help you pinpoint the defenses you have built, it will help you overcome them. This book provides a valuable resource to individuals and couples alike. Also, couples would do well to read this book together. With the right tools and a "can do" attitude, any couple should be able to attack the internal demons that prevent them from obtaining true sexual intimacy. This book will definitely put them on the right track.
In 287 pages that are split into four sections - Exploring Sexuality and Love; Factors Influencing Sexual Development and Adult Sexual Functioning; The Defensive Process of Sexuality; Therapeutic Approaches to Problems in Sexual Relations - and ten chapters, there is a solid, understandable holistic approach in exploring the various dimensions of sexuality and love.
Authors Robert W. Firestone, Lisa A. Firestone and Joyce Catlett argue that everyone is damaged in their sexuality, whether it is feelings about oneself as a man or woman, or excessive guilt/inhibited sexual drive, or perversion/shame about the body or performance anxiety.
And, truly, we learn about sexuality during our formative years, and, according to the authors, can carry positive and negative interpersonal factors into adulthood. Those factors include parental attitudes and behaviors, cultural and societal influences & verbal/sexual abuse and incest.
Particularly interesting are the case studies and charts - which include Negative Thoughts Toward One's Partner and An Imaginary Conversation About Sex - that can be used as self-exploration, self-help tools while reading the book.
A major plus is the chapters are broken into specific parts with titles, which assists the reader in focusing on areas of interest or need. "It is important to bring the subject of sexuality out in to the open, as we have done in this book," says Robert W. Firestone, in an interview that is part of the Epilogue.
Most Recent Customer Reviews
This book is very thorough, both in dealing with a wide spectrum of different factors, relevant to what might make intimacy and sexuality difficult, and in the scope of learning,... Read morePublished 16 months ago by Arnon Shahar
A highly intelligent look at the crucible that forms our sexuality (our families) and the ways we can grow with a partner. Read morePublished 23 months ago by Astrida V.
When I got this book (it was given to me for free), I was a bit concerned that it was going to be a boring text book style catalog of case studies similar to what I had to read... Read morePublished on October 13, 2009 by Chris Meirose
Great information to understand the perception of both woman and man in different situations. Great self-help book!Published on January 27, 2009 by Dr dre