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The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts Paperback – January 1, 2015
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Unhappiness in marriage often has a simple root cause: we speak different love languages, believes Dr. Gary Chapman. While working as a marriage counselor for more than 30 years, he identified five love languages: Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service, and Physical Touch. In a friendly, often humorous style, he unpacks each one. Some husbands or wives may crave focused attention; another needs regular praise. Gifts are highly important to one spouse, while another sees fixing a leaky faucet, ironing a shirt, or cooking a meal as filling their "love tank." Some partners might find physical touch makes them feel valued: holding hands, giving back rubs, and sexual contact. Chapman illustrates each love language with real-life examples from his counseling practice.
How do you discover your spouses and your own love language? Chapmans short questionnaires are one of several ways to find out. Throughout the book, he also includes application questions that can be answered more extensively in the beautifully detailed companion leather journal (an exclusive Amazon.com set). Each section of the journal corresponds with a chapter from the book, offering opportunities for deeper reflection on your marriage.
Although some readers may find choosing to love a spouse that they no longer even like hoping the feelings of affection will follow later a difficult concept to swallow, Chapman promises that the results will be worth the effort. "Love is a choice," says Chapman. "And either partner can start the process today." --Cindy Crosby. This text refers to the Amazon.com Exclusive Journal & Paperback Book Set. --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
''Whether your marriage needs a tune-up or a major overhaul, these are powerful prescriptions delivered by a genial, wise man.'' --AudioFile --This text refers to an out of print or unavailable edition of this title.
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Top Customer Reviews
A big part of improving your relationship with your spouse or boyfriend/girlfriend is to sticking with a date night to make sure you have quality time together. Especially if you have children or a high stress occupation. My wife and I have been together for 10 years and got stuck in the rut of an endless routine of doing everything we could for our kids, followed by daily chores and left little time for ourselves. Committing to 1 date night a week has really helped our relationship and improved our communication.
I recommend the book for sure and found it inspiring and worth reading. All couples can benefit from reading this book. The only downside is I wish it could have been a little longer. The stories from the author are interesting and I would have liked to have heard a bunch of his other examples of couples that he has dealt with. It was a short book and my wife and I finished it in 4 or 5 days and that was reading it slowly. The price is easily affordable. I found it best to photo copy the test quiz at the end instead of writing in the book so we can give the book to any family or friends who are struggling with their relationship.
I am a quality time person, which I knew, but it was interesting to hear Chapman's explanation of quality time -- in a nutshell, undivided attention or doing something that you both enjoy doing. Not just sitting around watching TV or doing your own thing next to each other. Now I know what to ask for when our time together is not feeling very satisfying.
The other book that has had an impact on our relationship is Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus. I know, I know...but the tenets in that book are, for the most part, spot on! Both books helped me understand myself and my partner better. Now I just need to get him to read them. :P
It wasn't until that it was recommended to me by one of my very good friends that I had decided to finally leap and buy it.
OF course relationship problems at the time -___- 75% his fault 25% mine (You know how some simple minded men are, they act straight foreign on you when you tell them you feel uncomfortable about something then they lie to you and expect you to get over it or just see that your feelings don't matter in this situation when it does because a Monogamist relationship consists of TWO PEOPLE NOT UNO) Yet this book truly explained some things.
I've come at easy with some things and he has grasped a better understanding of how unfair he was being. I had to sit and read the chapters to him because he dislikes reading books @_@ Kinda obvious that I am the bookworm and he's the game whore.
Most Recent Customer Reviews
Will recommend to other married couples, struggling or not.
Realized that my husband and I speak opposite love languages.Read more
Took away lots of wonderful nuggets!
Highly recommend it!