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Love Life for Every Married Couple Mass Market Paperback – December 24, 1996
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Physician Ed Wheat has helped thousands of couples improve their love-lives and build happier marriages. In Love Life for Every Married Couple, he'll help you improve your marriage through sharing, touching, appreciating and focusing healing attention on your mate. Answering physical, psychological and stress-related questions in a Christian context, Dr. Wheat demonstrates how to bring your feelings of love back to life.
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There is not one mentioned excuse for separation or dissolving that can be found.
It is the best primed functional tool, fitting all circumstances of marriage. I found it humbling and disarming.
I counsel women in troubled unions therefore it was advantageous to locate a resource that I can recommend without question. I consistently disclose Hosea's Biblical example as he stood caringly firm in his love for his prostituting wife. I found Dr. Wheat cites Hosea in the areas of forgiveness and restoration-what a way to make my day.
Love Life is not just for troubled marriages...it is also for anyone planning on partaking in a nuptial covenant as it provides multiple opportunities for designing a romantic and exciting union. If I could, I would make every Christian couple pour over this in all serious study for compliance. Song of Solomon 2:15 reminds us to capture all the foxes that endanger a marriage...the cages needed to entrap them have already been designed through adherence to the scriptures.
1Peter chapter 2 deals with suffering and chapter 3 specifically deals with suffering in marriage. So many believe it should be automatically fantastic and when it isn't, they often devise a way out. Dr. Wheat views suffering as a way to grow and mature as believers and as an avenue venturing to a more fulfilling and thoughtful marriage.
The only drawback to the book in my opinion was church discipline was never addressed. This element is key when dealing with a wayward spouse. The church is to exercise correction when a mate is in sin so others will be fearful of disobeying and to bring the offender into repentance and restoration. This is also important as 1 Corinthians 5, especially verse 11, advises us not to let immoral people in the church.
I am reading this book a second time and taking notes on the things that really will help me to make permanent changes in our marriage that will make us both happier. Of course we are still working on things, so I cannot honestly say that this book changed my marriage....yet. However, I am convinced that it is correct and has sound biblical principles backing it up. I feel for the first time that I really have a solid handle on what to do and have hope that things will be better in time. I do think we will find happiness together.
Just an update to this review. It is now about 3 months after I posted the original review and I still hold the belief that for me, this was the best book I have read. My wife and I are definitely on the road to recovery. We are communicating better, she is making more effort to work through things with me and I am finally feeling like we are going to both be happy. We are still working through some of the healing that we needed, but based upon the changes I made in my attitude and expectations after reading this book, we are working together better as a team to handle our life issues. I don't want to make it seem like it was easy....it was not, but the message provided in this book was really the key for our situation.
Update 8/3/2013 almost 3 years later
Things are still going well. Our marriage is much better now than it was for many years before everything happened 3 years ago. We still have issues now and again as life throws things at us, but we are able to work them out as a team, and I often use some of the learning from this book to help me treat her right even when we are not happy with one another. Overall, we are much happier than we were before and that is all that really matters. I have every confidence that we will have a long and loving relationship till death do us part.
Well I changed my review. It really takes 3 people to save a marriage Yourself, your spouse and God. I thought that God and I were enough, but I was wrong. Apparently, my wife was only pretending to be happy. She tells me now that the only reason she did not leave was fear of the future and not wanting to be alone. Despite all the changes I made, she still never forgave me for some of the issues we had prior to 2010. I was not able to be "perfect" and sometimes I got resentful at her going out with her friends all of the time and her lack of affection as well as her pulling away from our faith. I kept trying, but when I got really sick (spending several days in the hospital being off of work for over a month, and a year of recovery), she was not really there for me and I had difficulty dealing with everything. The medication caused me to have depression and other issues. I finally got to the point where I was feeling better in May and then out of the blue she told me that we are done. She said that she never really loved me and she never will. I guess if I look back, I did see some signs and we did have more issues the last year, but I always tried to look at the positives and thought that we would figure it out. We have been going through our divorce now for 2 months and I have completely lost hope of saving the marriage. I have lifted it up to God for his will to be done, but I was not able to use this book to save the marriage and therefore cannot keep it at 5 stars. I left it at 3 because I do think it helped me a lot to help fix many of my issues and become a better man, husband and father. Maybe I can use that to make some other woman happy (someday), but ultimately it did not save this marriage. I do not think, even if I was able to perfectly love her unconditionally, that I would have been able to save the marriage. I could be wrong and maybe it is my failure to be totally unconditional in my love, but I really do not believe that. I don't really have the strength to keep trying at this point. The harder I try the more she pulls away.
Doctor Wheat takes a slighty different approach to marriage in this book. Everything that is in this book, he takes back to scripture out of the Holy Bible. I've never seen an author base so much of their findings on scripture as Dr Wheat has. As Doctor Wheat explains in the book, (paraphrased) "Follow these instructions to the letter, and give it 6 months to see change." Even if you don't think you need improvement, you need to read this book. Quick reading, to the point, excellent choice. This book is indeed a God-send!!! Thank you Jesus!!!