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Love, Money, and Parenting: How Economics Explains the Way We Raise Our Kids Hardcover – February 5, 2019

by Matthias Doepke (Author), Fabrizio Zilibotti (Author)
4.3 4.3 out of 5 stars 70 ratings
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An international and historical look at how parenting choices change in the face of economic inequality

Parents everywhere want their children to be happy and do well. Yet how parents seek to achieve this ambition varies enormously. For instance, American and Chinese parents are increasingly authoritative and authoritarian, whereas Scandinavian parents tend to be more permissive. Why? Love, Money, and Parenting investigates how economic forces and growing inequality shape how parents raise their children. From medieval times to the present, and from the United States, the United Kingdom, Germany, Italy, Spain, and Sweden to China and Japan, Matthias Doepke and Fabrizio Zilibotti look at how economic incentives and constraints―such as money, knowledge, and time―influence parenting practices and what is considered good parenting in different countries.

Through personal anecdotes and original research, Doepke and Zilibotti show that in countries with increasing economic inequality, such as the United States, parents push harder to ensure their children have a path to security and success. Economics has transformed the hands-off parenting of the 1960s and ’70s into a frantic, overscheduled activity. Growing inequality has also resulted in an increasing “parenting gap” between richer and poorer families, raising the disturbing prospect of diminished social mobility and fewer opportunities for children from disadvantaged backgrounds. In nations with less economic inequality, such as Sweden, the stakes are less high, and social mobility is not under threat. Doepke and Zilibotti discuss how investments in early childhood development and the design of education systems factor into the parenting equation, and how economics can help shape policies that will contribute to the ideal of equal opportunity for all.

Love, Money, and Parenting presents an engrossing look at the economics of the family in the modern world.

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  1. Print length
    384 pages
  2. Language
    English
  3. Publisher
    Princeton University Press
  4. Publication date
    February 5, 2019
  5. Dimensions
    6.4 x 1.5 x 9.4 inches
  6. ISBN-10
    0691171513
  7. ISBN-13
    978-0691171517
  8. See all details
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Editorial Reviews

Review

"A Fatherly Top Ten Best Parenting Book of the Decade"

"A Choice Outstanding Academic Title of the Year"

"Psychologists, sociologists and journalists have spent more than a decade diagnosing and critiquing the habits of ‘helicopter parents’ and their school obsessions. . . . But new research shows that in our unequal era, this kind of parenting is essential. That’s the message of the book Love, Money and Parenting: How Economics Explains the Way We Raise Our Kids, by the economists Matthias Doepke of Northwestern University and Fabrizio Zilibotti of Yale. It’s true that high-octane, hardworking child-rearing has some pointless excesses, and it doesn’t spark joy for parents. But done right, it works for kids, not just in the United States but in rich countries around the world."---Pamela Druckerman, New York Times

"An incisive look at parenting and economic inequality."---Carolyn Dever, Public Books

"Why do so many seemingly sane people get over-involved with their kids? The answer is not that parents have collectively come unhinged, according to the new book Love, Money and Parenting: How Economics Explains the Way We Raise Our Kids. Rather, parents today are rational economic actors responding to an increasingly unhinged environment."---Jenny Anderson, Quartz

"An earnest tilt at a genuinely hard question: To what degree are parental choices informed by economic realities? Reducing his answer to a single line is reductive, but let’s do it anyway. When it comes to raising Americans kids, it’s the economy, stupid."---Patrick A. Coleman, Fatherly.com

"As economists Matthias Doepke and Fabrizio Zilibotti reveal in their recent book Love, Money, and Parenting: How Economics Explains the Way We Raise Our Kids, today’s American parents are not so crazy after all. For better and worse, their parenting style is perfectly rational."---Kay Hymowitz, Institute for Family Studies

"All in all, a highly informative read."---David Lorimer, Paradigm Explorer

"The book introduces stimulating ideas in an accessible manner."---John Ermisch, Journal of Economic Inequality

Review

“Love, Money, and Parenting presents a fascinating, insightful analysis of the origins and consequences of different parenting styles over time and place. Doepke and Zilibotti explain how and why parents shape child preferences and skills to adapt their offspring to the anticipated social and economic realities facing them as adults. The authors creatively use basic economic theory to integrate and interpret a vast body of evidence from multiple disciplines. This ambitious, well-argued book carefully examines how families influence the social and economic fortunes of their children.”―James J. Heckman, Nobel Laureate in Economics

“Economics is usually the last thing on people's minds when they think about parenting. This wonderfully readable and original book aims to change that. It shows how different parenting styles are all about trade-offs, how they shape the way children explore and experiment with the world and take risks, and how economic factors have played an important role in the striking changes we have experienced in the way parents think about their children and parent them. A must-read.”―Daron Acemoglu, coauthor of Why Nations Fail

“In their stimulating account of the reasons behind different parenting practices, Doepke and Zilibotti unashamedly argue for an economic interpretation, while also including social and cultural factors. Worryingly, the authors show how emerging societal divisions could enable some parents to promote their children even as they disable the efforts of parents in more difficult economic circumstances. Parenting regimes by class threaten equal opportunities, social mobility, and political participation. The authors’ hope is that thoughtful policy interventions can head off such threats.” ―Jane Humphries, author of Childhood and Child Labour in the British Industrial Revolution

“Presenting many key findings and novel explanations, Love, Money, and Parenting argues that we can use economic principles to explain why different parenting styles exist across different countries and within countries at any given point in time. At once intelligent, sophisticated, and accessible, there is no other book that tackles the same themes as this one. I really enjoyed reading it.”―Nattavudh Powdthavee, author of The Happiness Equation

“Bringing together personal experiences, reasoning, and evidence, this fascinating and persuasive book shows that parenting decisions are governed by incentives and an economic approach can help us to understand why parents’ choices might vary across countries and over time. The wealth of information, detail, and strength of economic argument is impressive.”―Jo Blanden, coauthor of The Persistence of Poverty across Generations

Product details

  • Publisher ‏ : ‎ Princeton University Press (February 5, 2019)
  • Language ‏ : ‎ English
  • Hardcover ‏ : ‎ 384 pages
  • ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 0691171513
  • ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-0691171517
  • Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 1.7 pounds
  • Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 6.4 x 1.5 x 9.4 inches
  • Customer Reviews:
    4.3 4.3 out of 5 stars 70 ratings

About the authors

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  1. Fabrizio Zilibotti

    Fabrizio Zilibotti

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    Fabrizio Zilibotti is a professor of economics at Yale University. Hailing from Bologna, Italy, he earned his Ph.D. in economics at the London School of Economics. Before moving to Yale, he was a professor of economics at Universitat Pompeu Fabra, Stockholm University, University College London, and the University of Zurich. He is the recipient of a number of international prizes and awards, including the prestigious Yrjö Janhsson Award for the best European economist under 45. Zilibotti is a specialist of economic growth and development, particularly of China. His research explores the role of culture and family upbringing in determining inequality of opportunities and intergenerational mobility. He has studied with an interdisciplinary perspective the economic and cultural determinants of "parenting styles" across countries and over history. He is the coauthor (with Matthias Doepke) of "Love, Money, and Parenting: How Economics Explains the Way We Raise Our Kids," published by Princeton University Press.

    Fabrizio Zilibotti's academic webpage can be visited at https://campuspress.yale.edu/zilibotti/.

    See more on the author's page
  2. Matthias Doepke

    Matthias Doepke

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    Matthias Doepke is a professor of economics at Northwestern University. Born and raised in Germany, he first came to the United States to study economics at the University of Chicago. Doepke's research explores how decisions taken within families shape macroeconomic outcomes and how, in turn, economic conditions feed back into what families do. He is coauthor (with Fabrizio Zilibotti) of "Love, Money, and Parenting: How Economics Explains the Way We Raise Our Kids."

    See more on the author's page
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4.3 out of 5 stars
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Customers find the book's content interesting and relevant. They describe it as well-written, with anecdotes, and friendly for readers like them.

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Customers find the book helpful for understanding parenting. They say it connects personal experiences with compelling arguments and data. The book provides great examples that help readers understand their own choices as parents.

"...Clearly, parenting differs across time and countries (the authors provide many examples), but that’s also because the environment in which parents..." Read more

"...Reading the book is a great experience in knowing what are the possible explanations for different parenting styles over time and across countries...." Read more

"This book is helping me to understand things I’ve observed anecdotally living in various countries, as a curious and loving parent, wondering about..." Read more

"Fascinating book. Well-written, humorous, engaging as you would not expect from two academic economists...." Read more

4 customers mention "Readability"4 positive0 negative

Customers enjoy the book's readability. They find it well-written with plenty of anecdotes. The book is engaging and friendly for readers like them.

"...The book is well-written and full of examples, I highly recommend it." Read more

"...But the book is still quite friendly for readers like me and quite convincing...." Read more

"...They are able to formalize, in a very readable way with anecdotes aplenty, many of what I pondered and discussed over the years with other parents..." Read more

"Fascinating book. Well-written, humorous, engaging as you would not expect from two academic economists...." Read more

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The book received appears to be used before and returned by someone else. One can clearly see the line on the cover - wasn’t expecting this as this was shown to be new purchase at a discount.
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Top reviews from the United States

  • Amazon Customer
    5.0 out of 5 stars Fascinating book, highly recommended!
    Reviewed in the United States on February 20, 2019
    Verified Purchase
    This is a fascinating book that I greatly enjoyed reading. It makes a clear and compelling argument and connects it to personal experience as well as data and academic research. The goal of the book is to explain how the choices made by parents depend on their environment. The authors show for example that when inequality is low, then parents are more likely to give their children more freedom, and they impose more constraints and incentives on them when inequality is higher. The book presents a large amount of evidence supporting this argument by looking at changes over time and across countries. The parenting styles described in the book are based on the developmental psychology literature and the authors also discuss the evidence from that literature.

    I like how the authors emphasize that we should not assume that parenting styles in earlier decades or in other countries are wrong simply because they differ from what we find optimal. Clearly, parenting differs across time and countries (the authors provide many examples), but that’s also because the environment in which parents make their choices differ. I find this very plausible and witnessed it myself growing up in two different countries and with different families. It’s fascinating to read the many great examples in the book for how the environment affects parenting and how economics helps explain it. I think the book is relevant for virtually everyone, because it helps us understand the choices of our parents, and the own choices as parents. The book is well-written and full of examples, I highly recommend it.
    9 people found this helpful
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  • Yang
    5.0 out of 5 stars Great Book! Recommended!
    Reviewed in the United States on March 12, 2019
    Verified Purchase
    Personally, I find the book quite interesting and make me keep on thinking about my daily practices as a new mom of my little boy. Reading the book is a great experience in knowing what are the possible explanations for different parenting styles over time and across countries. Literally, I have no background in economics. But the book is still quite friendly for readers like me and quite convincing. I like the idea of using economic constraints to understand parenting choices. Reading the book reminds myself of some of the exercises done by my parents and also makes me seriously re-evaluate some of my daily actions with my son. This is really an interesting experience.

    Anyway, I highly recommend the books to all of you guys in case you would like to understand the relationship between parents and kids deeper.
    4 people found this helpful
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  • Ladybug
    4.0 out of 5 stars Absolutely fascinating read on how economics affects parenting choices.
    Reviewed in the United States on February 13, 2020
    So I went into this book thinking it was going to be about talking to your kid about finances. Whoooooops! It’s actually about how economics affects and influences parenting choices—which probably sounds a little boring, but I have to say it is FASCINATING!

    The authors argue that we’re getting back into a more authoritative style of parenting (right now most American parents exhibit heavy-handed helicopter-type controlling parenting practices, reminiscent of the US in the 1800s or current day Russia and China 😳). While it’s easy to criticize parents, especially when you see things like the recent college admission scandals, in truth, moms and dads are responding to the new economic and social constraints they are facing. One of the biggest constraints families are facing is the rapidly expanding gap between the richest ten percent and the poorest ten percent of Americans. When there is more inequality within a society, there are fewer opportunities for each person to make it on the “one right path” we push for every American kid’s future: college, grad school, and career. And when there are fewer opportunities to be successful, it means there’s a greater chance your kid won’t do well and succeed if they don’t get an A+ on that math test and volunteer at the soup kitchen every Friday.

    While most of the book focuses on observing and explaining why things are the way they are—without passing a lot of judgment—I really appreciated the possible solutions the authors present—like focusing on vocational training (to open up more ways for the 60% of people who won’t quality for college to gain financial success) and offering early education for all kids age 0 – 5. (Apparently the first five years of a person’s life are so crucial that it’s nearly impossible to reverse negative effects incurred during that time. That was eye-opening to me…)

    Even though the United States is on the path toward concentrating most of the power and wealth in this country into the hands of a few (much like, oh say, North Korea, China, and Russia, eek), I’m comforted by the fact that democracies have the ability to course correct. So long as people get out and vote to make their voices heard—and so long as their votes are counted by a democratically-elected government—we can find ways to redistribute resources, money, and power in this country. Let’s just hope Trump doesn’t turn the United States into a dictatorship during his remaining months (I hope not years…) in office.
    2 people found this helpful
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  • Deeps
    5.0 out of 5 stars Excellent Book - only part way through but loving it!
    Reviewed in the United States on March 25, 2019
    Verified Purchase
    This book is helping me to understand things I’ve observed anecdotally living in various countries, as a curious and loving parent, wondering about all the same things as Zillbotti and Doepke. They help explain the increase in parenting intensity from our own childhoods to those of our children. The change has been a dramatic one in terms of investment. They are able to formalize, in a very readable way with anecdotes aplenty, many of what I pondered and discussed over the years with other parents from umpteen cultures, schools and academics. Bravo - look forward to finishing this book and may post some more again!
    4 people found this helpful
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  • Dolly98
    5.0 out of 5 stars A very interesting book to understand parenting in the world
    Reviewed in the United States on February 8, 2019
    Verified Purchase
    Fascinating book. Well-written, humorous, engaging as you would not expect from two academic economists. I read some reviews that came out in the press these days. The reviews tend to say the authors like helicopter parents. This is not my reading. They speak of overparenting and parenting traps. They describe in great detail how bad helicopter parenting can do to future society. Also, they speak more of authoritative than of helicopter parents. Their argument is more subtle than just telling which parenting is good and which parenting is bad. Here and there, they stretch a bit the interpretation of the facts in their direction. Still, a great book.
    12 people found this helpful
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Top reviews from other countries

  • Ruben Gaetani
    5.0 out of 5 stars Insightful, careful and enjoyable
    Reviewed in Canada on February 25, 2019
    Verified Purchase
    Parenting has been of interest for economists for a long time, but it has always been perceived as a “micro” issue, one for which economists had to unravel fundamental patterns that would hold universally, independently from time and space. In this book, Doepke and Zilibotti take a different perspective, and they ask why parenting styles differ so dramatically across countries and at different points in history.

    As differences in parenting styles are documented, and explained as the outcome of the incentives generated by the surrounding economic environment, the book uncovers unexpected relationships between parental choices and some of the major economic transformations that we have experienced in the last decades. Although the authors are careful and never claim direct causality, they do succeed, in my view, in convincing the reader that parenting styles respond to changes in inequality, returns to education, economic growth, opportunities of social mobility, cultural and institutional environment. More than that, they argue that differences in parenting can be responsible, at least in part, for the rise and persistence of economic inequalities that we are currently experiencing, raising major implications for the policies that we should put in place to contrast this trend.

    The book does not contain prescriptive directions for parents on how to raise their children. Still, it will be an incredible reading for all parents, and I plan to give a copy to all my friends who recently had children. Not because I think the book can teach them how to be better parents, but because it will give them awareness of how the environment in which they live influences their decisions and behavior.

    Finally, the book is really pleasant to read and it is perfectly accessible to anyone even with no prior knowledge of economics. Compared to the average book written by an economist, this one is simply in a different league. The anecdotes about the authors’ experiences as children first and parents later make the reading very enjoyable even after a full day of work. But, of course, as economists we are not satisfied with anecdotes, and we demand a logically consistent and empirically testable theory, which the authors provide (but, no worries, no math in the book!). I recommend this book to all the readers.
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  • Giu85
    5.0 out of 5 stars Amazing book about parenting styles for broad audience
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on February 6, 2019
    Verified Purchase
    The book Love, Money, and Parenting by Matthias Doepke and Fabrizio Zilibotti provides a very interesting and fascinating overview of the tools economists and social scientists use to explain the raise and evolution of diverse parenting styles. The book does not only focus on differences in parenting styles across countries and societies but it also helps understanding the evolution over time of parenting styles within the same country. Why parents over the world behave so differently with their kids? Why parents within the same country make different choices when it comes to their children? Social scientists can help us answer these questions.
    This book is compelling and once you start reading it is difficult to stop. In my opinion, at least two important aspects make the reading unmissable. First, the authors carefully explain why parents facing diverse economic environments may act differently when it comes to parenting styles. However, they never make normative statements: the book does not present itself as a parenting guide and the authors never attempt to classify parenting styles as "good" or "bad". Second, the book is very broad in terms of approach. The authors analyze parenting styles by covering the existing literature from several disciplines on the topic, empirical analysis with data from many different countries, personal life experience, and anecdotal evidence. This approach makes the book incredibly enjoyable and the flow really benefits of this editorial choice. Anecdotes and personal experiences make some parts of the book hilarious, while empirical analysis and other more formal discussion provide the reader with great deals to think about.
    Summing up, I really suggest the book Love, Money, and Parenting to all possible audiences: parents and non-parents, academics and non-academics, etc. You won't regret the choice of this book!
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  • Swiss Economist
    5.0 out of 5 stars Great book on parenting for economists and non-economists!
    Reviewed in Germany on February 24, 2019
    Verified Purchase
    I highly recommend this book to economists as well as non-economists who are interested in the topic of parenting. I really liked the authors’ approach to the subject. They combine economic theory, empirical evidence, historical facts and practical examples to explain differences in parenting styles across history, countries and within society. They also share their personal experiences as fathers who have raised their children in various different countries. As an economist, I especially enjoyed the economic analysis. However, I believe the book is also suitable for readers without an economics degree.
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  • Tabitha
    5.0 out of 5 stars It is quite thought-provoking to me.
    Reviewed in Canada on December 15, 2019
    Verified Purchase
    I have been wondering what kind of parents is the best choice when my son has hitten a teen. This book gives me lots of key findings from a global perspective, now I am aware of what kind of parenting style is for me. My parenting style will have a direct impact on my child's performance. I am definitely inspired by the book and have learned a lot from it.
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  • Andreas Müller
    5.0 out of 5 stars Recommended: A compelling book on parenting style across time and space!
    Reviewed in the United Kingdom on February 19, 2019
    Verified Purchase
    This is a very compelling and comprehensive book on parenting style and its determinants in the past, present and future. The book takes the reader on a fascinating journey starting from the authors’ own parenting experience (great anecdotes!) and ending with an outlook how trends in inequality and institutions will shape the parenting of the next generation. The book’s argument is carefully connected to the latest academic literature and vast empirical evidence. At the same time it is very entertaining to read and provides a lot of food for thought.

    I read through the book on my way to work and enjoyed every bit of it. Highly recommended to all readers interested in family economics, education, and inequality and to all present and future parents!
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