- Hardcover: 324 pages
- Publisher: Thomas Nelson; 1 edition (September 5, 2004)
- Language: English
- ISBN-10: 1591451876
- ISBN-13: 978-1591451877
- Product Dimensions: 6.3 x 1.2 x 9.2 inches
- Shipping Weight: 1.1 pounds (View shipping rates and policies)
- Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars See all reviews (2,507 customer reviews)
- Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #457 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
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Love & Respect: The Love She Most Desires; The Respect He Desperately Needs Hardcover – September 5, 2004
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From the Inside Flap
Discover the Single Greatest Secret to a Successful Marriage
Psychological studies affirm it, and the Bible has been saying it for ages. Cracking the communication code between husband and wife involves understanding one thing: that unconditional respect is as powerful for him as unconditional love is for her. It's the secret to marriage that every couple seeks, and yet few couples ever find.
Today, you and your mate can start fresh with the ground-breaking guidance that Dr. Emerson Eggerichs provides in this book. His revolutionary message, featured on Focus on the Family, is for anyone: in marital crisis...wanting to stay happily married...who's feeling lonely. It's for engaged couples...victims of affairs...pastors and counselors seeking material that can save a marriage.
Using Dr. Eggerich's breakthrough techniques, couples nationwide are achieving a brand-new level of intimacy and learning how to: - stop the Crazy Cycle of conflict - initiate the Energizing Cycle of change - enjoy the Rewarded Cycle of new passion
And if you'll take this biblically based counsel to heart, your marriage could be next!
About the Author
Dr. Emerson Eggerichs, an internationally known expert on male-female relationships, presents the Love & Respect conference with his wife, Sarah, both live and by video to more than 50,000 people each year, including groups such as the NFL, PGA, and members of congress. With degrees from Wheaton College and Dubuque Seminary and a PhD from Michigan State, Emerson pastored Trinity Church in Lansing for 19 years. He and Sarah have been married since 1973 and have three children.
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Top Customer Reviews
Before picking up this book I questioned the author’s basic premise. Is he saying that husbands don’t need to feel loved and wives don’t need to feel respected? The author addresses this issue, and assures readers that this is not true, however he does believe that certain things resonate more with a husband than with a wife (and vice versa). I don’t think I completely agree with everything that the author said in this book, but there is still a ton of great material on these pages.
About 10 years ago I started working at a Christian book store, and around that time this was one of our best-selling books for many months. Much like Gary Chapman’s “Five Love Languages,” this book is very accessible full of memorable anecdotes and practical applications.
Here is the Bible reference for your convenience:
English Standard Version (ESV)
21 submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.
22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.
25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. 28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. 31 “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.” 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. 33 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.
Most women will have a tough time getting through the book. It does come across very one sided, basically explaining all the ways guys screw up....but if you read it for what it is...and understand some of the basic concept...this is for men and women....we are different...we process things differently, we by nature are wired differently and by nature have different priorities....then I think it is a good eye opener for men and women.
There are definitely nuggets of information that can improve any marriage....especially if communication is a problem between the husband and wife.....he does a pretty good job of explaining that what each of you are saying is probably not what your spouse is hearing....which leads to many verbal fights in a marriage that never had to happen. I would recommend this to struggling couples....for in sites in communicating to your spouse.
If you are interested in improving your marriage, saving your marriage, or reading a book to prep you for marriage and relationships, I would almost guarantee that you will find useful thoughts in this book.
This is a smooth read, but one thing I don't like is the author's repetion of phrases. It isn't bad when reading silently, but my husband and I read out loud to each other, and it is vaguely annoying. Also, if you are not a Christian you may find the constant references to the Bible uninteresting or frustrating. I would say though that if you can be patient enough to ignore the Bible verses, you will still find tons of wisdom in these pages that really hasn't a thing to do with religion. Also, many times the author states that men do one thing and women another, when it is opposite in my relationship. Read with an open mind.
The bottom line: i recommend this to anyone and everyone that seeks to improve a marriage relationship or otherwise. You will learn about yourself and your spouse. This book has been key to my husband and I having "productive disagreements" instead of drop down drag out fights!