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Mastering Fear: Harnessing Emotion to Achieve Excellence in Work, Health and Relationships Paperback – January 25, 2016
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About the Author
Robert Maurer, PhD, author of the international best-seller One Small Step Can Change Your Life, is a clinical psychologist and faculty member at UCLA and the University of Washington School of Medicine. Founder of Science of Excellence, he has served as a consultant to Walt Disney Studios, the Four Seasons Hotels, Costco, the U.S. Navy and Air Force, and Habitat for Humanity. His life-changing strategies are presented in more than 40 seminars to diverse audiences worldwide. He lives in Spokane, Washington, with his wife, Dia.
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I would have wanted to see a more substantiative review before buying this book so I decided to write one for future people looking at it.
The main idea of the book can be summarized as the following:
1. Fear is good - it's your body's natural response to stimuli and it's normal to be afraid. In fact, most people who are missing normal fear response don't do well in life. Fear is there to help you. This is very well presented in the book and worth reading just to convince yourself to change your response to it.
2. Modern response to fear is that something is wrong with you when you are afraid and this needs to be re-framed. If you don't welcome fear as a normal thing that happens and have secondary emotional reactions to it, that's when you get stuck in anxiety, depression, worry, etc. Also, I didn't know this, but Maurer presents that your body can't be in fight or flight at the same time as eating, so he posits that this is where many instances of "eating your feelings" / using eating as coping mechanism comes from. Interesting.
3. The healthy way to deal with fear is to reach out and get support from others. We are social animals and it's very important that we have a support network of other people that we can reach out to in times of fear / stress. He does a good job of describing different support types that we may need and how it may be necessary to get them from different people.
4. The next section of the book breaks down how healthy support networks are so important for success in work and creative endeavors. There are a lot of examples in this section of successful people (CEO's, leaders, etc) having strong support networks and how they credit them with their success. These examples, in my opinion, read a bit like filler as they don't add that much to the central idea and don't really provide any actionable advice. By this time, you're pretty bought in to the idea so it feels like the author is beating a dead horse. Although the examples are interesting in their own right, they don't give you advice on, for example, how you should go about building a good support network to deal with the fear you experience in your life. This is where the book feels more like a business book with many stories of how companies relied on collaboration and teamwork for their success.
5. Relationships and fear. The author does a good job of explaining how attachment styles from early childhood influence later fear response for adults. He also explains how the brain is involved and how we fall into relationship patterns that may not be helpful. Not the best book I've seen to break through this but it's a good overview of what is underneath. Several examples of how even some semblance of support is important for good outcomes.
6. Ending chapters discuss how and why people choose the wrong path to deal with fear and what you can do about it. Reframing internal dialogues was a helpful part here, as well as a list of recommended next steps beyond the book.
its been elaborated on how this solution can be used effectively at the work place , in relationships
overall I recommend this book to anyone who would like to deal with fear in a natural/proven way.