- Hardcover: 240 pages
- Publisher: Running Press; First Edition edition (January 12, 2010)
- Language: English
- ISBN-10: 076243774X
- ISBN-13: 978-0762437740
- Product Dimensions: 6 x 1 x 8.5 inches
- Shipping Weight: 12 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
- Average Customer Review: 69 customer reviews
- Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #566,411 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
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Meeting Your Half-Orange: An Utterly Upbeat Guide to Using Dating Optimism to Find Your Perfect Match Hardcover – January 12, 2010
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"This is a book of hope helping those looking for their other half move from pessimism to hope and from fantasy to reality. A must read for singles looking for love.”
Jillian Michaels, fitness trainer on NBC’s The Biggest Loser and bestselling author of Master Your Metabolism
“IF YOU’RE SINGLE, drop everything and read this book. It will completely change dating for you as you know it. I can work out your body, but Amy will get your love life in shape!”
Harper’s Bazaar, February 2010
"Disillusioned by dating? Meeting Your Half-Orange is the ultimate pep talk.”
Glamour, March 2010
“Tear up your old list for your ideal mate, says Amy Spencer, author of the new book Meeting Your Half-Orange. Forget the superficial musts . . . and focus on how you want to feel in the relationship.”
Cosmopolitan U.K. , February 2010
"Meeting Your Half-Orange by Amy Spencer is a dating guide with a difference.”
Laurie Sandell, author of
The Impostor’s Daughter
“I could not put this book down. Amy Spencer cuts through the scrap heap of self-help literature with a guide to life that is so joyful—so utterly helpful—you can consolidate that library into one. Women and men looking for love, meet your new guru.”
Star magazine, February 8, 2010
“Just in time for Valentine’s Day comes this upbeat book from relationship expert Amy Spencer. She thinks there’s a Mr. Right, or half-orange, for everyone, and the only way to find him is by being yourself. Sounds tasty!”
Actress Diane Farr, Californication and Rescue Me
“Where the heck was this book when I was single? It would have saved me years of frustration! I’ll be recommending Meeting Your Half-Orange to every ‘single’ person I know.”
Joanna Bober, magazine editor
“I feel like Amy is absolutely hitting on every issue that spins around in the brain of a single woman, even the ones that I couldn’t explain to myself. This book is a gift to women.”
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I only read ~30 pages and put it down because I wasn't in the place where I needed to be to meet my half orange. I knew I'd come back to it eventually, though. A few months later (when I was ready), I picked it up again, started over, and read ~50 pages. I put into practice the techniques in this book and shifted my outlook. In the back of the book are some quick guides/pep talks. I also read those and flagged them so I could turn back to them before a date. Anyway, I can attest that this book got me in the right mindset to meet my future husband. I am so grateful to Amy Spencer, wherever you are, for the bliss you spread with this book. I've bought it and sent it to 4 friends.
A friend of mine gave me some good advice that is line with the ideas in this book. It's so simple, but so logical. So far, it's worked for me in terms of friendships, and I am confident it will work for me in all my relationships:
Make a list, and make it detailed, of all the qualities you want in your soul-mate. Add all the qualities you definitely DON'T want in your soul-mate. Focus on how badly you want that person. Now, spend the next few days, weeks, months, or years BECOMING that person you have written down. That is the ONLY way you are ever going to truly love and respect yourself, and that is the only way you are ever going to find him or her. And no, you're not SO unique that there's no one out there who matches you. In fact, there are LOTS of people out there who do, and once you become the person you seek, those people are going to start walking into your life like magic. If you seem to attract negative people or unhealthy relationships, this will NEVER change unless you work on yourself. Like attracts like.
This is a beautiful book that may seem dreamy but is actually pretty rational. Unless you're actively trying not to get involved with anyone or living in a cave, relationships are pretty much inevitable. And relationships are ALWAYS mirrors. They reflect you exactly. And if you're not living your best life and being your best self, then you're going to attract people you don't truly want to spend your life with, even though you might think you do; that's why you spend so much time agonizing over the way they DON'T measure up. If you wanted to spend your life with them, you'd be happy with them just the way they are. So why can't you just walk away when you know they are not what you want just the way they are? Because you're afraid you'll never find anyone else, so you'd rather anguish over trying to change them than just walk away and take the risk of finding someone new who does reflect your best self.
If you want someone who is honest, then you have to be honest with yourself and others. If you want someone who is adventurous and doesn't just sit around playing video games all day, then you have to be adventurous. If you want someone who is generous and kind, then you have to start being generous and kind. If you want someone who loves you and respects you, then you are going to have to start loving and respecting yourself, which means taking care of your mind, body, and soul. Based on the assumption that relationships are inevitable, which they are, if you are being the person you want to be and living the life you want to live, you're going to attract a mirror sooner or later. And you may attract some guys or girls who don't mirror those qualities, but you won't have much patience for them once you understand and believe that YOU WILL ATTRACT your soul-mate. It's easier to ditch the bad apples once you realize that being alone temporarily is better than being stuck with the guy who is not for you.
My only problem with this book was how the author presented quick courtships and marriages. Almost all of the examples had women meeting their half oranges and marrying them within months...with no follow-ups on how their marriages were 10 or 15 years down the line.
If you read Tiger Woods Syndrome, you will learn that many men with serious issues are very good at adapting themselves to be exactly what you want in the beginning of a relationship, and they even believe themselves because they're overwhelmed with feelings and attraction. However, they often end up living a double life of lies and affairs or they abandon you because they realize they weren't being themselves and that love and attraction wasn't enough to heal the hole in their soul. They keep repeating this pattern, and no matter much you love them, you will never be able to fix them; only therapy and a true desire to work on their issues can change them.
Taking it slow weeds out the guys who are either conning you and only want sex or who have issues and are lying to themselves and are therefore unreliable in the long-run. Taking it slow allows you to really get to know someone and develop intimacy. I rushed into a quick engagement with a man who I thought was perfect for me but who ended up lying about everything. Needless to say, it was more painful than it had to be because I ignored the red flags and charged full steam ahead. Another book to read if you tend to get into bad relationships is How to Spot a Dangerous Man Before you Get Involved by Sandra Brown.
I had just come out of a really bad relationship. Two people being together because they had no one else to be with. It was a disaster. I was also very young. I picked up this book after someone I know recommended it and in a way I sort of knew these things already but the author had a great way of explaining.
I was single for a long while after reading this book and used tips I picked up from this book to guide me in finding my Mr. Right. It might not be for everyone but a lot of women out there are making those mistakes of settling with someone for all the wrong reasons. Its not about being picky, but its about finding true happiness with yourself and knowing what you want. Once that happens, everything else will fall into place.
i recommend this book for people (women, primarily) ages 17+.
I do have to say, though, I wish she had chosen another title. Whenever I mention the book to others, they always get caught up on the "half-orange," which isn't a particularly great metaphor anyway!