Mighty Gorga / One Million AC/DC (Special Edition)
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It's the film that makes "King Kong" look like a classic! Meet "The Mighty Gorga" (1969, 84 min.), a goofy-looking (and often cross-eyed) giant gorilla played by a guy in the worst ape suit ever seen in a motion picture! Journey to a Prehistoric Plateau and also meet a tyrannosaurus played, no surprise, by a guy wearing the worst dinosaur suit ever seen in a motion picture. It's a special effects non-spectacle so stupid it's breathtaking! Other creatures include a serpent guarding the Lost Treasure of Bronson Canyon, and such B-movie dinosaurs as Anthony Eisley, Kent Taylor, and Scott Brady. Then the same tyrannosaurus gobbles up cave gals in "One Million AC/DC" (1969, 64 min.), a caveman sex comedy written by none other than "Plan 9 from Outer Space's" Edward D. Wood, Jr. This berserk stone age skinflick also features a horny ape, a cave orgy, dinosaurs from the original "One Million B.C.," and lines like "I'm off to see the lizard." Wow.
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The film continues the theme on the DVD of annoying background music. Here it is composed for the unlikely quintet of harmonium, zither, bongos, doorbell, and spoons. (I wish it was as soothing as John Cage, but it is not.) There are typical caveman scenes: people lounging and eating grapes and BBQ ribs, cat fights, the old rubber lizard in a loincloth gag, and a chase scene that kind of looks like what would happen if Doris Wishman directed '10.' There are a couple of puns that will make you blanche, for instance "I'm off to see the lizard" (everyone knows that cavemen speak perfect English, occasionally with an Italian accent.) At the end the ape and his girlfriend are welcomed to the community of hominids with warm handshakes all around.
This is really below Ed Wood's normal level of quality and craftsmanship.
There are a lot of extras on the DVD as well, including some great trailers. Trailers of note include 'La Islas De Los Dinosauros" and the abysmal "Sound of Horror", a movie I saw on VHS and is the most pathetic dinosaur movie ever made.
Also featured is an amateur short so bad that I can't even bring myself to discuss it. It is called 'Nightmare', and I will say only that it gives claymation a bad name, and features the lamest prop newspaper ever seen.
There is also a short called 'Prehistoric Daze' featuring comedian Hank Henry (who?) in a hilarious henpecked stone-age romp. It is very embarrassing to everyone involved.
Finally, there is the single stupidest excuse for a short that I have ever seen, 'Diane the Jungle Girl and Jungle Girl and Her Gorilla of Love'. I won't even speculate on why anyone thought this was a good idea to spend money on.
Thanks, Something Weird! Another splendid job bringing us only the finest entertainment!
Hard to review a movie that I won't be watching for two more weeks.
Supposed to be a movie with the worst special effects since Mighty Joe Young.
( look it up if you were born after 1960 )
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