- Hardcover: 277 pages
- Publisher: Bantam; 1st Edition. edition (May 1, 1994)
- Language: English
- ISBN-10: 0553089080
- ISBN-13: 978-0553089080
- Product Dimensions: 1.2 x 6.5 x 9.2 inches
- Shipping Weight: 1 pounds
- Average Customer Review: 3.5 out of 5 stars See all reviews (2 customer reviews)
- Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #1,817,361 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
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Money Demons Hardcover – May 1, 1994
The Amazon Book Review
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Are you and your partner having financial problems? Bad news, says Dr. Susan Forward, who believes that money conflicts between men and women can seriously jeopardize relationships, and often stem from deep-seated issues. Forward, who has counseled financially distraught patients for years, has found that women who spend compulsively may be compensating for lost dreams: "Many women who played music, painted, danced, wrote, acted, or showed promise in some other art form when they were younger, or who once had professional aspirations, have had to give up their art or aspirations for marriage, family, or financial reasons." Although she doesn't believe that compulsive spending is a substitute for their dreams, "it is a way for these women to act out some of the frustration and resentment they feel." And such actions may lead to other symptoms, as women deprive themselves of their just worth, sabotage their success, and live in debt. Filled with insightful, if somewhat quirky, anecdotes, this book could be the answer many couples living under the stress of financial difficulties are looking for. --Cate Bick
From Publishers Weekly
The injured ego of a husband whose wife earns more than he is one of the most common money-related marital casualties indentified here by psychotherapist Forward ( Toxic Parents ). Written "for and about women" because the "unfortunate fact" is that they are often "the only ones willing to do the emotional work" to improve a relationship, this helpful, analytical guide seeks to assist in reducing conflicts in a relationship--many of them resulting in sexual dysfunction. Assisted by film writer-producer Buck, Forward points out that couples may unwittingly use money as a psychological weapon to control or punish, causing fear and resentment that explode in violent fights masking unconscious emotional "money demons." Chapters dealing with self-depriving women, compulsive gambling and the "money-reckless" man (spends money he "deserves" to have) conclude with self-help strategies. First serial to Good Housekeeping; Literary Guild and Doubleday Book Club selections.
Copyright 1994 Reed Business Information, Inc.
Top Customer Reviews
One message that is very useful is that our money issues are usually not about money at all, but insecurities we bring to the relationship. The issues and insecurities we have, usually we formed in childhood regarding our parents, or from previous marriages, or both. These insecurities show up in the ways we use and think of money, or in the way we view our partner's use and thinking about money. This idea, with numerous examples, makes the book worth a hundred times the price. Buy it!
I believe a number of the examples she gives are biased, perhaps by her own history and issues? All I am saying (and this is true of any book) is that you read it with a mind that thinks, "this author is a human who has her own issues and some of these come out in her writing." While she admits, humbly--thank you Dr. Forward, that she USED to have money demons, she gives the impression she has resolved them all and now is an authority speaking from clarity. I think this book would have worked better as half-memoir where she shares that she's still not quite finished processing a few of her own money demons, but resolved enough that she can help a lot of people with theirs.
Some of her case histories I found to be spot-on, and very useful to myself and to understand my situation.
While the book is written for women and particularly for women who have more money than "financially inadequate" men "who have nothing to offer me," if you can get past this bias the book has plenty that men may also gain.