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No Bad Kids: Toddler Discipline Without Shame Paperback – September 18, 2014
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"An effective, respectful approach to discipline requires a new lens, a lens that differs from many of the most common approaches to discipline. No Bad Kids offers that lens, providing practical ways to respond to the challenges of toddlerhood while nurturing a respectful relationship with your child. This book empowers parents to calmly address behaviors while honoring kids' feelings and experiences, thus giving them discipline experiences that help their developing brains thrive." - Dr. Tina Payne Bryson, co-author of The Whole-Brain Child and No-Drama Discipline
"Powerful, inspirational, and supportive. Janet Lansbury has expanded and built upon what Magda Gerber originally taught and modeled, while remaining true to the original philosophy. This is an indispensable guide." - Lisa Sunbury, RegardingBaby.org
"Whenever I have moments of doubt or confusion -- surrounding tantrums, moving, new schools, etc.-- I often turn to Janet Lansbury's website. I've mentioned it a few times because her thoughtful advice always rings true. She clearly respects children and reminds you that they're whole people in need of gentle love and compassion -- even when they're driving you bats:) Her books about parenting and discipline reflect this wonderful approach." - Joanna Goddard, A CUP OF JO
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Top Customer Reviews
As a parent, I also subscribe to much of Maria Montessori's philosophy, and RIE (the parenting philosophy developed by Magda Gerber that this book is based on) are very similar. In many ways, Montessori and RIE compliment each other. I've read texts by both Gerber and Montessori directly, and I must say that Janet Lansbury's books are more practically helpful. While Gerber and Montessori's original texts are very inspiring philosophically, what I appreciate about Lansbury's book are the practical examples. There's a bit of a "script" that she reiterates throughout the book that I find incredibly valuable.
The book isn't perfect, however. I do wish it was more carefully edited. I've read Lansbury's blog, and many of the best posts are in the book - I haven't read her blog extensively, so perhaps the entire book is simply a print version of her blog. While I love her conversational writing voice, there are a few typos (it's "such-and-such" not "such-in-such"), and areas where I wish she had expanded (a good editor would have helped here). A few of the chapters were simply examples and I would have appreciate a bit more insight from Lansbury herself, rather than being left to infer the message/meaning simply from reprinting other parent's letters (remember, we're exhausted, sleep-deprived parents of toddlers reading this! We need simplicity and repetition!). Other than these nit-picky issues, I find this to be an invaluable book. I will be reading and re-reading this book in the few years to come. Highly recommended to any parent or caregiver of a toddler!
All the (quality) parenting books mention the importance of staying calm while raising toddlers, however this book clearly emphasized that unless parent stays unruffled (no matter what!), young kids themselves get frazzled during guiding moments. I realized that a lot of times I was saying all the right things, but my body language was giving off signs of irritation at the situation, which my child would pick up. It is very important for your VERBAL language to match the NON-VERBAL, because if those 2 contradict each other, young kids believe the NON-VERBAL. The book helped me better understand that If I get irritated/impatient during a challenging moment with toddlers, they feel INSECURE and UNSAFE: "Does Mom love me the way I am, even when I have a hard time with controlling my emotions? Can she handle my strong personality? If she, my favorite person in the world can't handle me, who can then? Am I a bad child?"
Even though there were some points that I disagreed with, I feel the book was helpful in centering me as a parent and giving me confidence in dealing with my spirited child MORE EFFICIENTLY during challenging moments :) This is making parenting much more pleasant and enjoyable!!
It explains the challenges of caring for children in a very direct and clear way.
Janet Lansbury first book is as good as this one, but I think that children can become harder to decipher as they get to toddlerhood. No Bad Kids may come as a life savior for those who enjoy being/feeling mindful. I highly recommend Janet's books to every parent and care giver out there.