- File Size: 1289 KB
- Print Length: 110 pages
- Simultaneous Device Usage: Unlimited
- Publication Date: December 5, 2017
- Sold by: Amazon Digital Services LLC
- Language: English
- ASIN: B077YTBHWM
- Text-to-Speech: Enabled
- Word Wise: Enabled
- Lending: Enabled
- Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #432,617 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
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No Complaints: How to Stop Sabotaging Your Own Joy Kindle Edition
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I started reading Ms. Stewart’s blog years ago and vowed to stop complaining in my life. Like the book says, that’s harder than it sounds, especially if you are in an environment where it’s just normal. For me, that was pretty much everywhere.
I gleaned what I could from blog posts and the like and just stopped complaining. I still complain every once in a while, but I notice it so quickly that I turn into solutions focused mode really easily.
Reading the book, there are a ton of good exercises that help you to systematically look at your life, find where you are complaining, and do something about it. I found some areas of my life that were still complaints that I hadn’t realized, so that was nice to discover those and work through them.
The book is organized like a workshop and it makes sense to take time and go through it at a good pace. Some exercises will be quick, others might take a couple weeks to really make a habit.
Overall in my life, the changes have been very positive. If there was anything I wished more from this book it’s that I wish it had been written sooner. Since eliminating complaining from my life, my business has gotten better, I met and married my wife, have a kid and enjoy every minute more than I used to.
If you wholeheartedly follow Ms. Stewart’s advice, your mileage will vary, but I think you’ll find pleasant surprises await you when you give up complaining and embrace joy in your life.
I generally think of myself as happy and having a blessed life. When I first discovered the GoNoCo project I thought... what a great idea for all those other people who complain too much. I had no idea how often complaints, those isidiuos little bits of negativity without value, had become a part of my life.
Complaining is all around us in ways that are easy to miss. They effect how we feel about ourselves. They distract us from taking the actions that would actually make a difference. They are a sublte attack on the happiness of everyone around us. Yet they can easily go without notice.
Section 1 of No Complaints sets the stage by helping you understand what complaining is and why it exists.
Section 2, Awareness, starts by shining a light on all the ways that complaints can slip into our conversations and thinking and why they get there in the first place.
Section 3, Interruption, teaches you how to stop complaining in its tracks.
Section 4, Replacement, shows you many ways to fill the space you've freed up by taking complaining out of your life.
All of this together is a wonderful set of small steps you can take to make yourself happier, take more positive action in your life, and become that oh so rare source of positivity and goodness that others want to spend time around.
Get this book, read it, and put it into practice. It will change your life for the better!
Stewart breaks down types of complaining from the obvious to the insidious, looking at what motivates people to complain. (Interestingly, in her definition of complaining, the motivation is NEVER to find a solution) Getting under the surface that way has helped me to manage my own complaining, and to find better ways to deal with complainers around me. (Rather than just complain about them!)
Her style is clear, informed, and playful enough that I would feel safe giving this book to someone I thought needed it. But get it for yourself first! I don’t think of myself as the target audience…. but I learned a lot, and I will keep it handy as a reference.
As a psychotherapist, I recommend this book to my clients and highly recommend it to other psychotherapists.
The author unpacks the different types of complaining and the functions they serve, all steeped in compassion for the complainer. The distinctions (such as "complaining to deflect compliments" or "complaining to feel loved") really can bring profound insights for the reader exploring the unmet needs behind their complaining, thereby empowering them to receive the love, connection and appreciation they truly want.
Cianna Stewart offers so much in her succinct explanations and questions for the reader to ponder and explore. She explains and integrates many communication techniques (for example, non-violent communication), psychological and neurophysiological approaches, and mindfulness techniques in short, easy to understand sentences.
I highly recommend this book for anyone who is ready to feel more alive and bring more vitality and connection to their relationships. Warning: if you ponder on the questions Cianna poses in this book you will change your life!