Nutella Imported From Italy - 11 Lbs Big Tub
- Nutella, hazelnut, 11 lbs, italian chocolate
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Top Customer Reviews
Need to make 3196 pieces of Nutella covered toast?
Feel like really scaring that creepy guy at work with the nut allergy?
Always wanted to swim in a sea of Nutella?
Want enough Nutella to feed an army and then use the container as a diving mask?
Well, look no farther. Ferraro's 11 lb. Big Tub will make all of those dreams come true. And more.
In the summer of 1947, an unidentified object crashed at Roswell, New Mexico. When the government suits got on the scene, they found a swelling, storming chocolatey-hazelnut being, hellbent on destruction. They waged battle with it for 5 days. Many good men lost their lives in those days.
My father was one of those men.
In the end, they discovered that though they could not kill the fiend, they could incapacitate it by splitting it up, dismembering it and spreading its parts to the furthest ends of the earth. The chemists on the job were brought through their research to believe that though the separated compound maintained signs of life, this could be eradicated if the molecular structure was broken down. And the perfect machine was available for just such a task: the public. By inserting the compound into markets across the world for public consumption, they plotted to have the chocolatey-hazelnut being broken down and digested, robbed of its danger to make the world safe once more, so that sacrifices like my father's would not have to be made again.
But the Nutella was only mustering its strength. True, in the form of mere 13-ounce containers, the compound is insensate, unable to fight back against its digestion and death.
But the Nutella knew that if it waited, if it became more delicious for a larger public, its time would come.
Along came the 25-ounce jars. Still not enough to fight, but enough to make the humans lazy, weak, bloated. And so it bided its time.Read more ›
Most Recent Customer Reviews
My girlfriend is crazy for nutella.... unless it's a giant container for a valentines gift!Published 12 months ago by Brandon Hicks