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Only One Mommy: A Woman's Battle for Her Life, Her Daughter, and Her Freedom: The Lisa Miller Story Paperback – June 21, 2011
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This book starts with the history of Lisa Miller, and her fight to keep custody of her own biological daughter. I give the book a slightly lower rating because the information is somewhat scanty, and for another reason I'll explain. Lisa was involved in a lesbian relationship. Her growing up years, with all the trauma and dysfunction she was subjected to, and how she reacted with one addiction after another, is told well. There is adequate information of the time in which Lisa was a lesbian, and of her legal struggle to keep her daughter. What is not stated in the book (which many reviewers have opined) is that Lisa ever left her daughter in the care of Janet, and abandoned her. Lisa left before her daughter was two years old, taking her daughter with her. The book also says that Lisa's whereabouts are unknown at present, yet some reviewers read into this that she is in some country in South America. While this may be true, since it's not included in the book, the reviewers owe it to the reader to say so. Since they had "married" under Vermont law, Janet asserted that Lisa's daughter was also her daughter. Lisa and her daughter moved to Virginia, where same-gender "marriage" is not recognized, and neither is the right to parent simply because you have a partnership with the biological mother. It seems to be common knowledge that if a woman has children, and the father's parental rights are severed, and she marries another man, he can adopt his wife's children. Trying to carry over this practice into a situation where a "legal stranger" as Lindervaldsen calls them, can become the parent simply because they shared a lesbian relationship has never been done. I would call the term "legal stranger" somewhat misleading, though it may be legally correct. If the law has never designated a person who is not biologically related to a child, as the child's legal parent, then the person seeking the legal rights is a biological stranger. Generally speaking, if a parent makes the decision to place the child for adoption, this is a voluntary decision, and the courts have every right to make the new arrangement legally official. Once the government steps outside these bounds, to take children against the will of biological parents, it is playing god, and is out of its sphere of authority. The first half of the book is about the particular case.
The second half contains several different kinds of information. It starts out with a fairly detailed explanation of the law. It is fairly well written, but it helps in understanding if you have a legal background. That was the second reason I gave the book a slightly lower rating. Most people don't have a legal background, and this particularly applies to most homosexual activists, it would seem. The one thing that was missing from this explanation, to my mind, is that the law (human law) must be bound by what many people call the "natural law", which is to say, there are certain ethical rules which are intricately bound into the physical universe, including into the nature of human beings, that you violate at your peril. I would like to have seen a discussion more aimed at the understanding of the lay person. Also, it is fairly common knowledge that a biological parent cannot have an affair or live for awhile with a person of the opposite gender, and thereby grant that other person the right to take possession of her children if the relationship breaks up. To establish such a right simply because the two people who lived together were of the same gender would be unprecedented.
The book also spends a fair amount of discussion on the issue that the homosexual lifestyle is dysfunctional and destructive, citing particulars. One of the things I have noticed about this very thing is the vitriol in many of the reviews here. You can amass a group of people who can come in and write essentially the same vitriol and skew the rating of the book, and it looks like this was done, either spontaneously, or as a "flash mob" scenario. The people who write in this way are just demonstrating how the homosexual lifestyle warps the personality. The ugliest personalities I have ever met belonged to people who are either trans-sexuals or transvestites. I have always treated such people with courtesy, but if they have even so much as a bare hint that I don't agree with their lifestyle, they get ugly. The reviews here show the same thing. The homosexual "rights" movement does not recognize the right of dissent. This by itself is extremely destructive of our fundamental freedoms. The book gets into this to some extent. It finishes by discussing the situation from the Christian viewpoint, and urges people to show Christian compassion for people caught in the lifestyle. The book designates the lifestyle as a form of addiction, and since it is known that homosexual activity stimulates endorphins, this is a reasonable designation because, simply put, a person gets high on his own endorphins. It has been found that outside of marriage, sexual activity that stimulates these endorphins are inadequate to maintain the same level of pleasure indefinitely; eventually in order to maintain the same level of endorphins, a person must engage in ever more abnormal and harmful sexual practices, which can lead to sadism and even snuff scenarios. This is the trap of this addiction. The book could have explained it better, but it does indicate that the homosexual lifestyle arises from this addiction. It talks about the problem in scriptural terms, and urges Christians to reach out to those who are afflicted, which so far, has not happened as it should.
Some of the reviewers here would call this book hateful. I did not find it so. Stating your disagreement with a perspective is not hate. All material is stated in a matter of fact, compassionate way. The reviewers demonstrate hate by the way they mischaracterize the tone of the book. If they had their way, it would be illegal for anyone to disagree with them. This strikes at the fundamental structure of rights guaranteed in the United States, through the Constitution.
Some reviewers here are accusing the author of being involved in an international child kidnapping. This is an area of law with which I am familiar. Quite simply put, the felony of international child abduction can ONLY be committed against the child and the child's other legal parent. It CANNOT be applied to taking your own child to another jurisdiction in order to remove the influence of a legal stranger from the child's life. In other words, the accusation that a person is guilty of kidnapping his or her own child, absent another biological or legal parent, is nonsense.
The most important consideration is that children need and deserve legal protection of their right to be raised by their biological parents, both of them. Having been though a personal situation in which it was graphically demonstrated how destructive it is to the CHILD when one parent acts to deprive the child of the other parent, I can attest to the fact that a child grows up best when both parents lovingly raise him or her. Somehow in all the vitriol in the reviews here, this is forgotten. This is the primary issue, because children cannot protect their own rights. The government owes it to the child to protect those rights. We cannot suddenly turn the world topsy-turvy just so some people can have something they're not entitled to. A child needs to develop an intimate relationship with a parent of each gender if she is going to live an upright life as an adult. Another book I read showed that absent fathers often result in children who cannot grasp the reality of God's existence. The other reason fathers are so necessary is because children need to learn how to have a healthy relationship with a man. The price of not learning this can be astronomical. The courts have no authority to change this fundamental need; indeed, they are incapable of doing so. The last thing we need is courts that play god. The reviewers here want to ignore this vital right of a child. Kudos to the author of this book for stating it so plainly and courageously.
If you are considering buying this book, please ignore the rating. It has been skewed by a "flash mob" and is NOT ACCURATE. Shame on people for doing this! It makes a mockery of the rating system.
God, as a loving heavenly father, gave man free will, but also wrote a users manual called the Bible, which is not as confusing as parts of this book are concerning Lisa's plight ... a few I had to read multiple times to wrap my head around them ... Although many Biblical accounts talk about the subject, the last part of the first chapter of Romans exposes the sin ... and the conduit it becomes for many other types of evil behaviors.
The writing style of the book, filled with a plethora of verbs, adverbs and adjectives ... could be interpreted as a call to action to help women like Lisa, who have the monumental task of dealing with the fallout ... but only a true understanding of what's happening spiritually behind the scenes can help a person to separate the sin from the sinner ... giving women, like Lisa, the best shot at deliverance.