The history of Pentecostalism starts in Africa, home of Voodoo (vodou), the traditional religion of the motherland and the traditional religion of the diaspora. Here, the Damballa snake worshiping people were sadly shackled and sent abroad as human slaves. Coincidentally, the West and Central coast of Africa was also exporting slave religion, Orissa spirits and the spiritual culture of the homeland, including glossolalia. African slaves made their way to the Americas, particularly to Louisiana, which is a continuum to this narrative. Why? One hundred miles southwest of New Orleans, in Hoodoo country, William J. Seymour, child of slaves, was born. William J. Seymour had early life experiences with spirits and parallel manifestations like unto his forefathers who practiced pagan Voodoo religion. Unlike them though he was tainted with Protestantism and in his early thirties, around 1903, he became associated with the Church of God Evening Light Saints. This white, but racially inclusive group of holiness people, became his home. Here he was saved, filled with the Spirit and had a ministerial position. Seymour’s story continues as he changes denominations, doctrines, spirits and locales. In 1906 he is found in Houston, where he is schooled by Charles Fox Parham concerning a spiritual work needed by humanity, above what Seymour received while part of the Evening Light Saints. According to Parham, there was a third work which was evidenced by xeno glossolalia. It was a miracle, like Pentecost, whereby ministers and missionaries could speak in the native languages (tongues) of foreigners. Seymour bought in. In 1906, after arriving in Los Angeles, Seymour “got the Holy Ghost and tongues” and became the Father of Pentecostalism. Under his leadership multitudes of people received this glossolalia at the Azusa Revival and a world-wide missionary effort began. But the Devil is in the details, for understandable language did not take root as promised by Parham and Seymour. The whole concept was ill-fated and nothing more than the unintelligible gibberish, like African witch doctors practice, was the result. Not only were the missionaries disillusioned with their Shaman-like tongues, but the entire outgrowth of Azusa was thrown into a series of exact and parallel manifestations, those seen in Voodoo and in African traditional religion. Early on, numbers of denominations and ministers took the snake oil of Damballa and experienced his pagan-based reactions, from illicit sex to glossolalia. But Pentecostal Paganism is an energizer bunny, for the initial 1906 pagan manifestations pale in comparison to what the so-called “Holy Ghost” is doing in post-Azusa. It seems that the Damballa Spirit of Paganism has camouflaged himself as the real Holy Spirit – and created Pentecostal Paganism. His cunning methodology has allowed Pentecostals to “pray in tongues” while at the same time hiss like snakes, practice gay sex, steal widows money through false pretense, talk to dead people, laugh uncontrollably and indulge in witchcraft. These, among many other Pentecostal Pagan manifestations have been used to paint the picture. Now that the final colors have been placed on this rendering, take time to study its hues and composition – then contemplate the interpretation of its pagan shades, 50 shades of Pagan Pentecostalism.