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Parenting With Love And Logic (Updated and Expanded Edition) Hardcover – April 19, 2006
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From the Back Cover
About the Author
JIM FAY has thirty-one years on experience as an educator ans school principal. He is recognized as one of America's top educational consultants ans has won many awards in the educational field. He successfully guided his three children through their childhood and teen years using love and logic.
Top Customer Reviews
In general, I like the idea of natural consequences, enforcable choices, and encouraging children to think through their problems. I can see myself using these principles with my own daughter, but not always the way the authors do it. Some of the sample dialogues in the book are reasonable but many do not sound as genuine and empathetic as the authors imply.
Some of the examples in the book and in the "pearls" are making me very upset. In one case, a child has been neglecting her dog by not feeding it, so the mom just gives it away with no warning and without confronting the girl about it. The authors admit this is a really tough approach but that's how kids learn that unless you take care of your health and your animals serious illness or death can result. Now this sounds crazy to me. In our home, we think of pets as a family responsibility, so that might be one difference. Still, wouldn't it teach the girl more about empathy to sit her down and say "you can either come up with a schedule and feed the dog or we are giving it away, you have one week to improve." Why do these authors feel that giving someone a second chance is a bad thing? It seems this might teach her "if I don't fulfill my responsiblity, someone else will take care of it for me."
Another example is a mom who asked her son to do something and he mouths off and refuses. So the next day when he asks for a ride she says, yesterday you showed me that asking nicely can be ignored, so I'm not going to drive you to your activity, even though you asked nicely.Read more ›
My background: I am a linguist and cognitive scientist who advocates neurological nurturing and optimal brain health through parenting the sound, scientific way. I have a two year old, and I am a devoutly practicing Orthodox Christian. So note that when I say that I find this book lacking in the Christian principle of love, of treating others how one would like to be treated, and full of evangelical wrong-headedness. It is also chock-full of bad neurological strategies, and takes advantage of a child's dependence and immature brain structure by making them choose out of helplessness to the situation. This is dangerous stuff.
1. Chiming into the chorus - no innocent animal should ever be allowed to suffer; If we took the sound conclusion that the authors make elsewhere in the book, that warnings allow kids to know that they have stretch room in our discipline habits, and that we should avoid warnings and make a serious point to let kids know that unacceptable behavior has an immediate consequence, then the logical conclusion to come to is that if your kid can't take care of the dog they wanted, they have to find that dog (with help, of course) a loving and better home than the one they're providing...not withhold food from the dog. It's cruel, and the dog never deserved to have to suffer.Read more ›
Most Recent Customer Reviews
Love the book and appreciate how quickly you mailed it to me! THANK YOU!!Published 4 days ago by Michelle Middlebrooks
Made perfect sense to me. This was the first parenting book I read, so I am planning to read more books and use their strategy together with this onePublished 10 days ago by Rippa
There are some good points in the Love and Logic approach. It asks children questions, offers them choices and lets them make their own decisions - rather than giving orders and... Read morePublished 11 days ago by Lucia Flamini
I'm still reading this book. It was recommended by our agency, and it has been very informative.Published 18 days ago by RGue
It's confusing to figure out which book to buy for toddlers. I think since they've been around so long, they have lots of books published. Read morePublished 19 days ago by Kathryn C.
My daughter and I see a play therapist, well my daughter sees her and I arrange the appointments & stay as an active parent in my daughters learning moments😂. Read morePublished 22 days ago by Allison
The love and logic principles comprise one of three or four pillars of wisdom that have guided my wife and me through 27 years, parenting four kids. Read morePublished 29 days ago by Brian Smith
A must for every parent to read and practice. Finally a manual for being a parent in a good way.Published 1 month ago by tan in texas